I am worried about my Hubby?

Question

He works all the time, or sleeps. We never do anything together anymore. He says he is madly inlove with me and we still tell each othe we love each other all the time. Why do I feel so alone. He and I don't have s*x only maybe 3- 6 times a year. I am lost. I cook, I clean, I keep myself up, I am a halfway attractive lady.. His personal hygiene sucks too. He won't bath unless I get pissed and tell him he is going to sleep on the couch, he quit brushing his teeth, he don't shave.. Is he depressed or what?? He says hes not, but who knows.. Can anyone give me an advise. I am still young, and I feel like my life is just passing me by.. It really hurts.. TY, :)

Answer 1

My reaction is that he does not respect you or is resentful.  s*x in a marriage of only 3-6 times a year is enough to cause a divorce on it's own.  The fact that he will not bath could be a form of showing you resentment to you - that you are not worth cleaning up for.  Of course, some people always have had bad hygiene for whatever their reason are.  I am assuming this is a change in him too.  Sit him down and let him know how serious this is to you.  Show him your post if you want.   If he insists that nothing is wrong, ask him to accompany you to the doctor for a check-up.  If that checks out, then marriage counseling.  

Answer 2

I can kind of relate to you. I have a lot of those problems too. I think my problems are because I married into a relationship too young. It feels like we have nothing in common. I don't know about the hygiene thing though. Maybe you should suggest counseling for him or you both together (if you have insurance). Tell him how you feel. Remind him how young you are and how you want more in life. Maybe it might help him get himself in check. Good luck to you!

Answer 3

well sound that he's lost and could be some sign of depression . You need to feel your not alone .but you need not stop talking to him look on the computer about depression and he might need to go to the doctor and you might know that women are very strong well and need to see if you love him and want to do anything to stay in a married and you have done everything you can for him and you have no love to give.honestly really think things out.Remember you not only person that going through it.

Answer 4

It sounds like depression to me since he doesn't even keep up his appearance anymore.  The best thing you can do in a marriage is communicate - let him know how unhappy you are and see what else may be going on that's making him behave this way.

Answer 5

sounds like clinical depression, get him to a doctor

Answer 6

This sounds like clinical depression.  Or possibly a bipolar disorder.  You should consider seeking help for your husband.

An accquaintance recently had a problem like this.  She, though, has five small children.  Her husband threatened to kill her children in front of her, and then kill her.

He was committed for bipolar disorder.  He had some of the same problems.  Working long hours, and sleeping when he was home.  Bad personal hygiene and he was always sick, and didn't want to deal with his children or the rest of his life.

You can research some more specific traits of these diseases using the internet.  Wikipedia.org, any search engine... or even WebMD.com a personal favorite of mine...

...of course these internet self-diagnosis tools aren't any replacement for an actual doctor.  Try talking to him about getting help.  Making him feel better.  Use it as a good thing... say things like "you'll feel better, you'll feel better about going to work" and "nobody needs to know that you're getting help to make our marriage stronger, and your life easier."

All of these things are the truth.

Good luck

Answer 7

yes that really sounds like sure signs of some sort of depression, i mean for him to not bathe, or shave or brush his teeth, then to sleep all the time,it sure is sounding alot like depression he feels, either way you should talk to him, and try to get help for him, if you are truly concerned for him,GL.