I been with him for 5 yrs....?

Question

i have been with my boyfriend who is my best friend for 5 yrs on and off . we have been through so much together good and bad.... i am so ready to get engaged and finally move to that next step , we have both proven how much we love each other and cant be with out each other. But he told me a few times in the last 2 yrs how he wants to get engaged and married real soon. I feel like he keeps making false promises , i dont know id he is saying it cause he know that is what i want so badly or he is just scared to commit because he has had that problem for the last 5 yrs .... i talked to him about it almost a month in half ago telling him i am sick of not moving forward and need more in our relationship already... he said ok we will get engaged in the next couple of weeks , i agree and i think we should take out relationship to the next step. i was so happy and excited . Here i am still he hasnt talked about it since then hasnt proposed , nothing! am i wasting my time , what should i say

Answer 1

Well you don't want to push him into it.I know he may be slow about things,but if I were you I'd rather have him do it on his own when he is ready with no regrets without me nagging him to do it.Just a thought...Good luck!=)

Answer 2

So did you keep the baby?

Why don't you propose to him?  Its a two way street and if he doesn't want to committ like you do there is no use in pestering him.  Just give it to him straight, either marry me or move on, maybe he needs a scare to get his act together.

Answer 3

Wow, you forgave him from making you get rid of the baby and making false promises?  It sounds like he's just saying what you want to hear.  Sit him down and have a serious talk about what HE wants...then decide if you really want to stay with him.

Answer 4

It all boils down to the old saying:

Why buy the cow, when your getting the milk for free.

and "no" you are not a cow. <}:-})

Answer 5

The real question is why do you want to marry someone who clearly isnt ready or doesnt want to take that step with you?  You should respect yourself more.

Answer 6

My fiance proposed to me 2 years ago when he was drunk -  I told him to ask again when he was sober,  you can imagine what I was thinking & how I was feeling (I have bpd & ptsd for the added bonus) when over 12 months went by and he hadn't mentioned it again.

I took control earlier this year (It's a LEAP YEAR GIRLS -WHO SAYS YOU CAN ONLY PROPOSE ON ONE DAY OF THAT LEAP YEAR???. I bought the ring set (engagement & wedder set we use joint funds anyways) and put it in front of him...Asked if he knew what it was & what it was for. He said he did. I told him I was going to wear it as it should be worn and if he didn't agree I was leaving. I told him I loved him - but I want a guarantee for my future and ours. He said to keep the ring on. Not to ever take it off.  Now I am planning a wedding!! With his help.. He is as happy as I am & I don't feel I have pressured him into anything he doesn't want.

On the other hand - he could be organising the surprise of your life for you....

It's up to you here, wait and be patient or take it into your own hands.....Good Luck.

Answer 7

Yes you are waisting your time in my experience people and relationships like this is tenative and predicable due to the past is perdictable for the present and future.

Say nothing and get on with what time you have left to start another relationship with someone that appreciates you for you.  

Remember why buy the cow when you get the milk for free.

No one is getting any younger.

LFT

Answer 8

Maybe he's just scared of getting out of his bachelor mode.  Yeah you may be bf and gf but there's nothing that is tying you down. Its like the first time you guys move in together.  Instead of always pestering him about it just let him figure things out.  One he's not ready or two he's thinking of a great way to surprise you.  If you're really that worried about it maybe you should tell him that you want to take a break from eachother.   That'll prolly scare him if he really loves you and wants to keep you haha : )

Answer 9

This has happenede to be before but not engaing. but doing other stuff. He probably doesnt have the time and doesnt have enough money to buy and engagement ring.