I can't get over my dogs death.?

Question

About 12 years ago we bought a dog (I was 4) It was a golden retriever named Chelsea and she acted really funny and did strange things like roll on her back with her feet kicking in the air lol.

But a couple of months ago, she had trouble eating, she wouldn't finish all of her meals. Concerned my dad took her to the vet and he came out with bad news saying she had cancer of the lymph nodes. Lymph nodes are in the throat area. He gave her an estimated time of 2-3 months to live. I couldn't believe this when I heard him on the phone. I couldn't even sleep well because I kept on thinking about her and what life would be like with her not there. Time passed, and she kept on eating less and less so my dad decided that it was best to put her out of her misery, and he had her put down. She was buried in the front yard, under a new tree that we planted. We buried a tennis ball (she loved to chase them lol) and her food dish and leash / collar with her.

Even after this time, I am still upset, I wish she was here so bad, and I really really miss her. She used to lay in this spot by the stairs all the time, and now seeing it empty, is a weird feeling.

Is there any way to rid me of these upset feelings? I tried being happy knowing that she is no longer in pain, but it just doesn't work.

Answer 1

She was with since you can remember, that's hard.  There's no easy way, you just have to remember all the good things.  I never had a pet until now, I'm in my 20's.  I am not looking forward to that day, but it has to come, it's part of life.

Answer 2

i wonder what will happen when your parents die

Answer 3

Your dog was your childhood friend and it will take time to not feel quite so sad.  

Answer 4

You had and loved this dog for a long time.  She grew up with you.  This is part of your childhood that is now gone.  The grieving process is hard and takes time, but it does provide healing. Know in your heart that you and your family gave a dog a warm, loving home which many dogs are not priviledged to have.

Based on your timeline, I am assuming you are now about 16.  I would not necessarily recommend getting another dog unless your parents are also wanting it as you are beginning to enter a new phase in your life and a dog may not fit well into it.

You seem like someone with a terrific heart that gave a dog a great home.  I would strongly recommend that you consider fostering rescue dogs as that will help you "give life" to many other dogs which can help you overcome your grief.  There is pain in letting those dogs eventually go to their new homes but it is mixed with the joy that gave them the opportunity.  You also make room for the next one to be saved (unfortunately, there is always a next one).  

If interested, you can find information about any particular breed's rescue on-line.  They are always in need of a good home to help the dogs adjust back to a "normal" life.

Answer 5

I am very sorry for your loss, only time can truly heal what you are feeling inside. Good luck.

Answer 6

I am really sorry for your loss i know an animals death can be so hurtful as they are a cherished member of the family.

Grief affects everybody differently so nobody on here will be able to tell you how long you will be feeling such great pain.

I can already tell that your dog had a great life with you and your family as it is obvious you all cared so much. Just take comfort in the fact of knowing you gave your dog the best life possible.

Nothing will be able to replace Chelsea though in time you may want to think about getting another pet? Since caring for animals is obviously something you feel passionately about.

In the mean time try and treat yourself to some nice things like pampering yourself etc, doing things you like. Remember the grief process is something you have to go through which means that you will feel a lot of emotional hurt but after your brain has processed this you will be able to move forward, keeping Chelsea in your heart always.

Answer 7

There's really know way to get rid of the feeling you will always remember her just think of all the fun times together instead of things that make you sad also try to tell people how you feel if you don't feel comfortable write down your feeling!  I'm sorry for your pets loss hope it helps!

Answer 8

get a photo of him and get a nother dog the same and call him cheasea jr  

Answer 9

im sorry but i went though the same thing i had a great dane (har.) and we had to put him down just a few months ago and he was my baby even though he was huge and he got really sick and hips were getting bad.... and don't get another dog unless u r ready for a new one try differnt types of dogs sorry but yeah

Answer 10

aww i feel so bad 4 u.. know how ya feel.. my dog had to be put down about a year ago now due to old age, although it dont seem like it now, in time you will feel better. Just think of the long happy life she had and that should make you feel better coz u were a part of it... neways hope that helps =]

Answer 11

Sorry, Only time eases the hurt.  I have lost two dogs to old age.  My current dog is 10 years old.  I dread seeing her age, it hurts so bad to lose them.  But, I always end up doing it all over again.  We love them and we lose them.  Be thankful that your life was blessed and your dog lived a lifetime of being loved.  Best wishes to you.

Answer 12

Your feelings are natural, Trav.  I'm sorry you have lost your best buddy, and have to go through this grieving process.  You will never forget her, but with time the pain does lessen.  Meanwhile, please accept a hug form me.    

Answer 13

I know it won't make you feel any better, but I've been in the same place as you are right now. I know how much it hurts. Dogs give so much to us; they don't judge us, don't care how we look, do lie to us, to pretend to be something they're not. They just love and protect us. What humans are capable of being all of that to us? No one. We humans are designed to be that perfect, but dogs sure are!

I can only have one male German shepherd at a time and that male becomes my everything. He's my shadow and is never away from me. I love him more than life itself. A few years ago, I was working in my office with my 2 1/2 yr old male shepherd, Moses, laying at my feet sound asleep. I left the room to do a few things and thought it was really weird that he hadn't followed me. Then I saw my husband and commented on how deeply my dog must have been sleeping and my husband went to check on him. He had died. No warning at all, he was gone. I was so destroyed I literally couldn't breathe. We later found out that he had died from a fatal heart arythmia - but the cause of death didn't matter to me, he was gone and I wanted him back!!!

My husband went and picked up a German shepherd puppy for me that very day. I didn't care about naming him, so my husband and daughter named him Dempsey. At first I didn't want anything to do with him and then he'd come up to me and turn his head while looking at me as if he was saying, "What's wrong? Why don't you like me?" It would make me laugh which would make him really happy. Before long I was holding him and crying because I missed Moses so much. And then I started noticing him doing things that reminded me of Moses. Within a day or so, I was already attached to him. And he was already following me around the house. He even followed me as I took a blanket out to Moses' grave because it was so cold. I know I was being silly, but I couldn't stand the thought of him being outside in the bitter cold all by himself.

Dempsey didn't replace Moses, but he was there for me when I was sad and that made me love him all the more.

If your dad will allow you to get another dog, I recommend doing so as quickly as possible. But remember, the new puppy can't be you Chelsea - but the new puppy can help you get through your hurt.

In time you will think of Chelsea and the pain won't be there. Only wonderful memories of a dear friend. You are incredibly blessed to have experienced such unconditional love at such a young age. You have had the love that so many people have never felt because they have never owned a dog.

I wish you peace whild you're going through such a difficult time.

Answer 14

im very sorry about ur dog. this may or may not help but maybe you could get a new dog.

Answer 15

Oh Hon ,my heart goes out to you over the lost of your best friend.At this stage of life I have lost many wonderful dogs and horses to old age and other causes.It never gets easy,You never forgot the ones that really matter because they are a part of your heart.But you do come to understand the blessing of having them in your life for such a long time out weights the pain of the loss.Right now the best thing you could do would be to get a puppy=not to replace her (that will never happen) but to make you laugh again-to give you some thing to teach and train and fill that empty space left behind.The only thing that helps besides what I have listed is time.Best of Luck.Tilks Mom

Answer 16

you'll never really be able to get over it completely. i had a wonderful lab for 14 years before i had to have him put down. this was two years ago aug. 4 at 4:30. see, i still can't even forget the time he was put down. its a cheesy answer but just remember the good times you had with her. i had another dog already that was there to comfort me when the lab went. just know if your spiritual beliefs are the same, not that i'm some holy christian(i don't even go to church) that you'll be able to see her again someday. let yourself embrace this to maybe even better your overall personality. she's having a great time in heaven, out of pain, eagerly awaiting your arrival when it's your time. i hoped i helped, i know this can be hard.

Answer 17

Go to her grave and talk to her and tell her you love her and that she is with God now.

Did you ever think you might want to get another dog like a puppy?

My deepest sympathies.  I have a dog too and I love her so dearly she follows me everywhere.  Karen H in Cleveland, Ohio

Answer 18

get another dog??

idk sorrry i cant help too much

Answer 19

I'm so sorry for you, I know how you feel, it has been way over a year now since my dog Shadow has passed, he was hit by a truck while my dads friend was watching him, he was so full of life and then it was taken away from him in the matter of seconds, there really is nothing that you can do to speed up your healing process, I still grieve over the loss of my dog, it is going to be hard, but time will heal you, try doing stuff to distract yourself, keep yourself occupied. Getting a puppy is a good idea, you feel better when you have something that you need to take care of and will love you unconditionally, it will not fill that void in your heart for that space will always be for Chelsea, but you will soon fall in love with another puppy as you did with Chelsea.

Best wishes~*~*

Answer 20

I hope this helps you, it has for me. I feel for you dear!

The Rainbow Bridge

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....  

Author unknown...

Answer 21

I had a german shepherd for only 1 year. She died in my arms 2 weeks before my b-day. I was so sad. I cried everyday for weeks. My first advice:

1) don't rush anything. Getting a new dog, might seem as a disrecpect and you might not be ready for one yet.

2) It is alright to cry, tears help a grieving heart untill it is strong again.

3) Don't sit around moping about your dog, think about the good memories you had, you'll feel alot better.

4) A new dog, shows that life goes on. Perphaps the spirit of your old dog will be guiding your new dog.

5) All dogs are irreplaceable. Your new dog, (should you choose to get one), will help serve as a reminder of the fond memories you had together.

I myself got another dog, 6 months later. She is a darling and I love her so much. I still miss my german shepherd, but my new dog has helped me heal slowly and given me the courage to move on.

Answer 22

Get another one that was kinda of the same, make sure that its the same type and give it junior as a nickname but if its a girl name it the other name that you liked.

Answer 23

I know how you feel, I'm so sorry. You will feel better with time but you will not forget the memories. And actually that will be a good thing in time. Go light a candle at, www.rainbowbridge.com for her. The have a monday night prayer too! The poem there is very comforting too! Just hang in there she really is better off, and she is waiting at the bridge for you.  

Answer 24

I am very sorry for your loss. I know how difficult it can be. The wise thing to do is to let yourself mourn your beloved Chelsea. It is good to cry it out then to accept that this is life. Contrary to many people if I were you I would not get the same kind of dog or name it the same name. Chelsea was unique and can not be replaced. You need a new pup completely different with a different name and even different gender. With this new pup you will have a different, new, wonderful & unique experience.

Answer 25

try to get another dog and call her chelsea or charlie dude move on i went through the same with my 1st dog snickers i was crushed and dipressed but make roon in ur heart for a less fortunate pet rescue one u feel good about it and get a warm heart.