I can't throw anything away... and by that I mean ANYTHING... HELP!?

Question

I don't know what's wrong with me. I just can't bring myself to do it. Everything seems to have some sort of memories or sentimental value associated with it. But it's not just photographs. Even mail, and sometimes even junk mail! I have to keep everything. My house has rooms full of stuff and I try to go through it but I just can't throw anything away! Even pencils, and I don't use them anymore at all. It's horrible. My guest room, dining room, office, and TV room have all become storage rooms. I know I'll get some people who just say "throw things away" but it's not that simple... I mean I literally cannot throw anything away without crying and feeling a huge sense of loss! What is wrong with me? I know other people who throw things away constantly. One of my friends saves a lot of money by living in an apartment... he makes plenty of money for a house but doesn't need one because he has no problem throwing things away so his place feels big. Help me please!

Answer 1

ahh...you are a hoarder. Did you ever watch the show "Clean House"? it's about families that are like you. THey have sooo much clutter and mess, they don't throw ANYTHING away, so the people from the show come and go threw it all and have a giant yard sale and donate everything that doesn't sell to charity adn makeover a few rooms of the house..

anyways, call up some friends or family and ask them to help you. You need someone else to talk you into getting rid of stuff. It won't be easy at first. BUT rest assured, once you give your place  bit of a makeover all that clutter gone will actually make you more relaxed when you are home. Have a big yardsale then donate donate donate, that way you are not just throwing things away!

Answer 2

The underlying problem is that at some deep level you have confused things with self-worth.  You feel panicky when you think of throwing something away because it feels like you'd be discarding a part of yourself.  

This isn't uncommon, but it does need therapy to overcome.  Forget the suggestions about sorting, about getting friends to help, etc.  Once you deal with the root cause it will be simple for you to get rid of things you don't need in your life.  Until then, it is not possible.

Find a therapist who has a lot of experience with this kind of problem.

Answer 3

I know how you feel, trust me, it's very overwhelming.  Yup its all about the memories and sentimental value.  I can find a reason to keep just about anything.  I have held onto junk mail too actually.  My situation is a bit different though cause I still live with my family and only have a bedroom to fill up, so I don't have alot of space to use anyway.  But I still know I have stuff that I don't need.  I do manage to throw some c**p away sometimes though, so my room doesnt look nearly as bad as the ones on "Clean House," but it isnt great either.  One thing I think of when trying to decide if I can let something go, is whether the benefit of keeping it outweighs the disadvantages.  Like, is the agony this mess causes worth keeping all these items?  The mess will make you feel depressed and anxious- it's amazing how much your surroundings can affect your well-being.  Also, another thing I've been doing is taking pictures of things with my digital camera before I throw it away, like if it's an old thing that you'd want to remember- it makes me feel alot better about getting rid of it.  I read about that idea somewhere and tried it and it really did help.  

Another thing I realized is that things I have thrown away in the past, I have not regretted.  Seriously, I can't even remember everything I've thrown out- if I don't miss it now, cant even rememebr it, I didn't need it in the first place- no loss there!!  So it's like the feeling of loss that hits when you throw something away, is TEMPORARY (and they are things, not people).  But the feeling you have from having a clean, organized, functional room, is something that will keep on as long as you keep it that way, and the benefits totally outweigh the "losses" .

This hoarding can be a big symptom of OCD, but even if it isn't OCD, it's a problem that needs to be treated and a therapist is your answer. Try my suggestions, which may help but if that's not enough, just get a therapist.  They will help you work it out.  You'll feel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders once  the rooms in your house don't resemble a junk yard anymore.  Good luck and I know it's anything but simple but u can overcome it.

Answer 4

You've certainly got a huge problem with hording!

Get therapy. And get friends to clean stuff out for you, since you can't for yourself.

One pack-rat to another, good luck!

Answer 5

This is actually a diagnosed disease and one that is treatable with a professional.  Studies have been done on this and even aired on TV.

You are a "pack rat" and it is not easy and in fact overwhelming to deal with, sorry for you.

Yet you are not alone.  So take solace in that.

Things you can do is try separating, not throwing out just separating.  Begin with small items like the mail or those pencils and separate them into things you think you can throw or you DEFINITELY need to keep.

Do it slowly and keep a bag next to you so that if you get the need to throw it out do it.

Then graduate to bigger things.  You should also realise that you are no longer able to find things so this leads to you having to go out an buy it again which leads to a big waste of money.  So your living conditions, your financial conditions and your emotional condition are all in jeopardy here.

Best of luck!!