I dedicate my pain to you...all the scars you never knew.?

Question

Um...even though I'm only a nineteen year old girl in college, I've been through a lot in life. :( From molestation, to abusive parents, to being traumatized with suicide, to abusive boyfriends, to rape threats, to...stalking...to...*sighs* the list goes on. I have a good life right now. I've had a good life ever since my boyfriend entered the scene and I love him a lot but all my trust has been completely shattered so idk what to do. I want to tell him I love him because he's already said it but even that's hard. how do i fix myself?

Answer 1

I hear your dilemma. You think you love this guy, but saying that goes beyond your trust level.

Can you trust him enough to tell him you have had a very rough past? If so you can explain that while you care for him, it takes you a long time to be sure of yourself Tell him you trust him but not enough yet.

He should be supportive.

Answer 2

have you talked to him about your past? if not, i suggest you do...because in order for him to be a part of yoour future, he needs to know where your coming from, and whyy you have such a hard time expressing your love for him.  

Answer 3

Try going to therapy or talking to him about this. That is what a good boyfriend is about, helping your girl with her emotional needs.

Answer 4

theres no "easy fix" only time will tell.. to get trust, you have to give it. Life is hard.. for a lot of people, trust me im not trying to "pretend" i know what ur going through cause you have deffinately been through a lot. But  thats why you have friends or a boyfriend.. To help you things like this.. (now to answer your question---or attempt) Wait to to tell him u love him--if he REALLY loves you he can wait.. Wait til you completely trust him--remember, dont hid behind a brick wall!  i really DO hope this helped...

                 good luck..      ([e-mail])

Answer 5

You're not a computer, you can't just 'fix' yourself.  You said it yourself, you've been through a lot in your life.  Usually when someone has been traumatized it takes patience and it's all about your progression as a person, ya know?  If your boyfriend is a great as you say he is, he'll understand if you can't say 'I love you' to him.

Answer 6

Just sit down with your boyfriend and tell him that you love him.

As you have been traumatized with many life events, I would suggest that you see a counsellor who can help you sort out what you have gone through and empower you to heal yourself.  

Answer 7

OUCH... that's pretty hard what you went through.. but on the bright it's all getting better now thanks to your boyfriend. you just have to explain to him that it's hard for you to trust people. i'm sure he'll understand. just explain that you need more time...

And besides, i know that must be hard for you and i really admire your courage i mean it sounds like everything is getting for you

just give it some time! you'll soon see that there's nothing to be afraid of and you'll gain your trust in people in no time.. meanwhile, focus on working on it and try to see the positive things that are happennig for you

i wish you the best of luck ! =]

Answer 8

How do I fix myself?

This is a question that most of us ask ourselves at least once in awhile.

The answer, Time, Prayer, and Love. You will have to work at it every day of your life.

If you truly love your boy friend and believe that he truly loves you then tell him what has happened to you.

I trusted the man I love and that was over 20 years ago. We have been very happy together.

Answer 9

Well, accept the fact and act now. Try building your self esteem. First step to building self esteem, don;t follow steps they;re retarded x__x you gotta make yourself happy.