I do i tell my Son's dad's family NOT to do this because i wont be there?

Question

i have a 5 month old son, i am not with his father anymore although i dated him 2 1/2 years. my question is, my son has started teething recently. and once when i was over to get my son my ex's grandmother told me to rub tequila on his gums!!! i was horrified! and said no. ok well today he called and told me to drop our son off tomorrow for the day, well i briefly explained to him how lately he is crabby and because i cant find another reason i assume he is teething, then he said rub tequila on his gums! i told him no i don't ever want that to happen. anyways, how should i handle this? i wont be there all day to supervise, but i definitely don't want them giving my baby any amount of tequila even if they mean well. what should i do. his family has strange remedies and rituals. how do i keep certain things from happening because i will totally freak if my son gets tequila on his gums?

Answer 1

Buy some Anbesol, or a baby equivalent. It's a product designed for tooth and gum pain and provides a numbing effect.

Let his family know that it is the product that works the best for him. You can also buy baby tylenol drops. Just say that you had mentioned the tequila to your pediatrician, and s/he suggested these products instead. Make sure they know you appreciate their respect in the matter.

Answer 2

the only way to guarantee he wont have this happen is to not leave him over there. because even if you ask them not to, they still might.

Answer 3

The only way to be sure that they won't do this is not to leave him with them.  Some people you just can't trust not to do something stupid and your son's well - being is what's most important.

Answer 4

Packing the Oragel and Tylenol are VERY smart.  Just let them know that these 2 items combined truly work for your son. Insist, with a please, that they NOT use alcohol on his gums.  Then cross your fingers and hope they oblige your request.  You will still worry, but alcohol truly was the remedy for centuries before Orajel and a small amount rubbed on his gums won't hurt him.  If anything, he'll hate the taste and fuss from it (serves them right for giving him alcohol!).

Answer 5

i guess you cant. unless you leave your son at a friend or relatives house. lol but maybe you should trust you ex's family for once. and if his gums smell like tequila when you pick him up, obviously do not let him out of your site when ex-grammy comes into town

Answer 6

There is no harm in them doing this to help with the child's teething. If you feel so strongly about it, then you need to buy the baby orajel and provide it to them. Denying his father the right to see his child because he doesn't use methods that you agree with, but yet are not harmful is flat out wrong.

Answer 7

First, a bit a tequila won't harm him.  But I do agree that I would be FURIOUS if someone did that to my child.  Now - I say that because the only thing you can do is be very very clear to NOT use anything on his gums - that you've talked to the Dr., and they said not to (okay, white lie,but gets the job done) and give them the benefit of the doubt.  Don't overdo or they might just to spite you (what my MIL did).

They may honor you.  They may not.  You may know if they ignore your wishes, you may not.  But if they don't, (and you find out) you'll have to take more direct action.  

And if you are that concerned about your child's well being that you just can't leave him there with out you.  period.

Answer 8

Although I don't agree with this, I can tell you where that "thinking" comes from.  In the old days....and yes, before my time....there were no gels to apply on the sore gums of a teething baby.  A lot of mothers would get a drop or two of whiskey on their finger, and rub it on the baby's gums, which would numb it a little, and give the child some pain relief.  Lots of mother's did that, and it never hurt the child, but I can understand how you would be upset.  I would suggest that when the father picks your son up, let him know there is a teething gel being sent with him.  Also let him know how often the gel should be applied.  That's really about your only hope.  I'm sorry.  Good luck!

Answer 9

Let me guess. Mexican, right? Those people have voodoo "remedies" for everything. Like "Shave off his hair mija, it will grow back thicker, si?" "Tequila on the gums to numb the pain. Tio, get me the bottle from the garage por favor." That's how we make alcoholics. Saints for every situation imaginable. "Pray to somebody. Anybody. One of them will come through for us. They're all tight with God." Abstinence. Like that's going to work in the middle of a cold night after an hour of foreplay. "Pull out before you come, Jose. If I get pregnant it is God's will." Your best bet is to never leave that baby unattended with those people. Period. Comprende?

Answer 10

its ur kid 2 tell them not to do it that you have his stuff paced for teething  

Answer 11

I'm sorry, but there is no way I would leave my child with anyone who would put alcohol in his mouth.  That method is a very old one, and I know it was used in my family "back in the day."  But it's not considered safe.  Even a very small amount of alcohol can poison an infant.  I really wouldn't take the risk.

Answer 12

wow you should talk to your son's father about this.  if his family means well, maybe you should ask a doctor about this.  if it is fine to do, then dont' worry about it.  if you feel strongly about this, dont be afraid to stand up to your ex family and tell them that this is your son and you are forbidding them to do this.  tell them this nicely though and that you know they mean well.  they were good parents and you are agreeing to their other methods but not this so dont do this for the sake of their grandson

Answer 13

You don't really have many good options here unfortunately...

you can

~~ refuse to let them see the baby without your supervision

~~ or trust that they will honour your request

It's a really tough spot and as long as they know how strongly you feel.

Just make sure you provide them with other remedies (teething gel etc)

You could also tell them that you tried it and he broke out in a rash and the doctor said he is severely allergic??? Just a thought

I'm with you though....  

Answer 14

buy that stuff at the store to put on the babies gums when they are teething and give it to them so they will use that instead of alcohol.