I don't feel a complete mother bond to my child and it's depressing me.?

Question

Although I work 4 days a week for 7 hours a mostly spend all my other time with him we are around other family a lot but I just don't feel like he truely differentiates me from other family members and it's depressing to me. Is this normal does it seems like post partum depression? My son is almost 7 months old.

Answer 1

Do you interact with him?  Get down and make goofy baby talk?  That is what babies like and what they are drawn to.  Do it everyday and soon he should start to remember and gravitate towards you instead of others.

Answer 2

Your son definitely knows you, his mother, from every one else. He has from the time he was born. He is probably social and he is learning to be around and socialize with others, which is wonderful. It will make it easier for you to leave him with other people when needed. I guess it could be partly depression, and you should talk to your doc about it. Its nothing to be ashamed of. Having a baby is life changing, even a year later or more you can still be questioning different things.

Good luck, kisses to your baby!

Answer 3

I can't even imagine how this must feel.  My baby reached for my husband one day when I was holding her and I was totally heart broken.  I think babies at this age tend to prefer whoever they are around the most.  If that is spread out amongst multiple people then I would imagine they wouldn't have a preference for one or the other.  You can't take it personally.  People keep telling me that...I know it's so hard not to.  It doesn't sound like post partum to me.  But, if you have doubts about that you should talk to your doctor.  Just try to make sure that the time you spend with your baby is the most special time of their day.  Go to the park, sing songs, play games...do whatever your baby loves doing the most.  That will make his time with you more memorable.  Try to make sure that most of his firsts are with you.  I took my baby to the grocery store and let her sit up in the front for the first time, we went to the park and she got to swing in the swing by herself for the first time.  Little things like this make us both feel special.  

Answer 4

nope! many mother determine that it's depression. but i don't think so..

he might just not sure how to make different expression. i am sure that you want something different reaction from him he is 7month old but he doesn't know how to express variety ways.

i know it's good to be around the family. when is your day off. why don't you have some quality time just you and him. either go to park? or at the mall playground. even go out for lunch with him. let him seat at the restaurant high chair have some those gerber puff snacks and you have a lunch and talks.

he knows who you are. i am sure that you don't have a big bondage. but no! your are the mom.. you are the only person that he will count on. don't discourage yourself!  make some quality time that other people don't do with him something that you are the only one who can do with him!!

good luck! remember! don't feel that;s the depression. you can make differently..

Answer 5

okay  think i get what you are saying.  it is not that you don't love  him or feel affection... it is that you feel like he doesn't pick you out of a room full of people.  My oldest son was the same way. I could drop him off with nanna and no tears.  When i picked him up no huge reaction.  He would go to anyone and it never mattered where he was.   I felt jelious of parents that had kids that lit up when they walked in the room.  We thought maybe he was autistic.  He is 5 now and is very outgoing and likes everyone and everyone likes him too.  All kids are different.  our 2nd was very clingy and shy, our little baby now at 4 months is very out going but is very attached to me and daddy.  So i  would say not to worry but if it is upsetting you a bunch talk to the pediatrician.  And if it is  making you depressed for real

(not just really sad) talk to your doc about it too.

Answer 6

do you see your son as a burden? if you do, maybe see the good he brings into your life, instead of focusing on what you can't do because he's here, will make you form a bond.

my son is 6 months old and i love the h**l out of him. when he reaches up with his arms for his momma, my heart melts.

BUT in the beginning i had resenstment because i'm always w/ our son (i work a full time job too) and was use to be FREE and going when i want and stuff. now, i just worry about my lil' boy and when i go out now,  i truly appericate it.

ps. you need to spend more time with him. PERIOD.