I don't get it, can someone explain this to me?

Question

It seems like everyone today in my office has an attitude. Especially my boss. I work in a law firm in Center City and sometimes it's not easy. But that's not my issue. My aunt of 49 years old passed away this past Tuesday. She died of cancer. I've been so upset these past few days and the family is in bad shape. She's basically been slowly dying. It's been hard and my boss knew about this from day one when I told her that I knew she was going to die within the month of July. She understood to a point, reminding me that I only have so many vacation days. Well, my aunt passed and I was not aware of the funeral date because my uncle hadn't addressed any of this yet. I'm sure it's very hard on him and their daughter, my cousin, Katy. She's only 21 and lost her mother so suddenly. That would kill me. Anyway, so I called my boss after my mother had called me and she answered the phone. The first thing I noticed was her attitude and tone of voice, which displeased me because I had left her a message stating that I would need to take a day next week for the funeral. I figured she would have some compassion, but there was none. She again, told me that my aunt passing doesn't cover under their policy, which meant that I would need to a PTO (paid time off). I already knew that, but I could do with out the attitude. I just lost my aunt and she was very close to me and I'm very upset over it. So, how about some f***ing compassion... She's human, right? No, none. Then a secretary walked into the room and asked if my Co-worker was here and I started to tell her that she called out...She said no need to explain. It doesn't matter.. And then she said that she, her self didn't matter. And I questioned it. She talked about all of us being able to be replaced like that. Like none of us matters. And I told her about what my boss told me. She said she acted the same way when her father died. All that my boss said to her was, you have two extra days for him. No, "I'm sorry for your loss", nothing! I don't get it. Why doesn't anyone care about human life? My goodness, have some human compassion! Like, it makes me sick to think that... I just don't get it.

Answer 1

I am so sorry for your loss.  The problem with business today is that it is all $ and cents. The family equation has gone out the window. Most business can replace anyone at any given time, and don't care about their personal life. Your boss is in between you and her boss, and she gets static if it doesn't run right. It would be so easy to show some sympathy, but she doesn't get shown any and doesn't think she needs to.  How cold the world has become, when they don't have compassion for the family of someone that has passed.  

Answer 2

First of all, I am so sorry for your loss.  I hope the memories of the good times you had with your aunt will comfort you and your family in your time of need.

Second... Wow!  I can't explain that absoloutely appaling behaviour of your co-workers, but I will say I think you need to find a new job!  No compassionate leave is absoloutely ridiculous, and clearly this is a toxic environment for you or any of your coworkers to be in.  Unless you absoloutely NEED this job I would say get out as soon as you can.  And when you do remind yourself to give your notice with the same disrespect your boss has shown to you.  Good luck and again I am sorry for your loss.