I don't know what to do I'm losing my mind!!!?

Question

My father has alzheimers and almost died last week from a loss of potassium.Had to pick him up 2 weeks ago about 2 hours east of home as he was still driving. Mother has has 3 back surgeries and will soon be in a chair although she refuses help. She also has macular degeneration and bladder problems. Won't even consider a nursing home.

I have a husband and a child in college. Other family members live far away and refuse to help or just don't care. Any suggestions on how I can regain my own life through this difficult time?

Answer 1

I would set the rules now with your mother and father. Since it's all on you, then you need to take control of the situation. Tell your parents that they'll need a live-in caretaker, where they get room, board and small amount of pay or hiring an outside visiting nurse to help with Mom. Explain that you love her dearly, but unless she accepts help from a live-in or visiting nurse, she'll need to be put in a home. With your father, I would have him use public transportation, rather than driving. Drivers with alzeimers can be danger to the public. It might be the best thing to get him to stop driving. Check your state about any help with your parents. They might have care programs and other services that might be of help to you. Best wishes.  

Answer 2

a few sayings like let go and let god  when life hands you lemons make lemonade-  when you dont know what to do next dont do nothing     life is handing you a lot of problems at this present time that there isnt a lot you can do about them  with your dad  i hope he no longer has access to the car  for him if the alzheimers has progressed far enough maybe a nursing home for both mom and dad is the only answer  she cant take care of him or herself  sad but true  you have a husband and child that need a wife and mother too  so you are torn between the parties   be strong and realistic   mom and dad maybe need the nursing home  there dont seem to be any other choice unless they can afford 24hr custodial care at home