I don't know what to do! What should I do?

Question

I been with this girl for a year and 8 months. We have had our ups and downs, but I love going to the club and partying. I'm about to turn 21 and I will be partying alot. I be with her almost 24/7 but I just like to go out some saturday nights with the guys and party. She gets upset, but I tell her that I can't help it I'm young and I want to enjoy partying. I'm not going out and sleeping with other girls or anything. I tell her to break up with me but she is still staying around. I don't want to hurt her because I care about her a lot so I stay with her. I feel like I will destroy her if I just leave her because she doesn't have it all together right now. Am I wrong for going to the clubs and partying? Should I just choose between one or the other?

Answer 1

It's okay that you go clubbing, but don't ditch her every weekend when Friday and Saturday rolls around. Why dont you go to 18 and over clubs if clubbing is what you want to do? And she shouldn't be mad if you explain to her that it's "guys" night... just reassure her that your not there to hook up  or talk to other girls and she should understand. If not, then just be single. You're young, and if it's meant to be you'll get back together later in life when your ready for a commitment.

Answer 2

I think you shouldn't just be selfish and not care about her feelings she must love you to deal with it but its like you can't just be so ignorant about and say you don't care and you have to understand its gone to be hard for someone to deal with the fact that there boyfriend is going to the club and dancing with plenty attractive women and just having fun without her like you say you want to go out with guys but what do guys do besides prey on women like a sigil. ok you spend time with her 24/7 that don't make it right she obviously she feel some way about it and you should come to an agreement instead of making her feel like if she talks or disagree about you going to the club that you are gone to go anyway that’s just disrespectful but your young party do whatever and you say I told her to break up with me maybe it isn’t that easy for her to just break up with you especially if your the first person she loved and she really cares about you and she jealous that your technically spending time with others females and having fun with them by dancing it probably makes her feel inadequate and she probably just don't want to lose you or share you with any other female just take that into consideration and most guys want to go hang out that cool but there limits and most likely she don't go out because she don't want to go out then you go out and do some crazy *** stuff because you think she is and plus she rather spend time with you and she happy doing that and it probably make her feel bad that spending time with her isn’t enough and she probably think once yawl start going out you will feel more ease about it and start wilding out but maybe since you think you gone to be partying a lot once you turn 21 maybe a relationship isn’t the best thing who knows but don't just drop her like she is worthless just give it time maybe things will figure it self out.

Answer 3

You are not wrong for wanting to act your age

and you definitely do not have to chose between one or the other

have you ever tried bring her out with you occasionally?

if you just want some time with friends without your girlfriend

explain that to her and tell her its not you abandoning her

you just want to go out sometime and have fun

she should understand that you have a life with friends too

Answer 4

yes you are being a terrible boyfriend! your girlfriend needs you and if you truly care about her like you say you do, then you'll give up your childish ways and stay with her!

she may be the one, you won't be able to get her back and have what you used to share with her if you don't stop being careless

even if you guys do get back together if you brake up with her from your stupid mistakes, you'll never be the same

my boyfriend stopped drinking and partying for me because i needed him more than a drink or anything

i also quit drinking and partying. i don't do any of that stuff anymore. i will not be a hypocrite.

if you want to be a good boyfriend and help you get a good future in line, you'll stop partying. she may be the one! don't lose her unless it's for something really serious

please, take my word for this! you're 21...that's not a time for partying it's a time for growing up

Answer 5

she should just be your booty call.

Answer 6

You should pick. End of story. Yeah, you are young. A 21 year-old guy wants to party every chance he gets. He wants to hang out with friends and do all that. And there's nothing wrong with that at all--a young man wants to do young man things. That's that way it should be.

However being a man means being mature and making mature decisions. That means not having your cake and eating it too. You can't just keep her around and see her when you want. That's selfish. So you gotta be straight up with her. If you know you're gonna keep going out and hanging with the guys and all, you just gotta tell her, 'Look, I care a lot about you, but I'm a young guy. And there'll be a time when I won't be able to live it up anymore. This time in my life is for doing those things. If you can't deal with that then we need to have a different arrangement.'

Now if you want to be with her then you have to quit going out. I mean, yeah, once in a while is ok. But it has to be ONCE IN A WHILE.