I don't trust anyone. I'm paranoid about my friends.?

Question

I didn't have a great childhood, was bullied in school nt many friends but now i'm perfectly fine. I have many friends and im a happy teenager but the problem is im very paranoied and dont trust anyone. I dont tell them any of my secrets because i'm afraid they'll go blabbing or that their not really my friends and talk about me behind my back. I don't trust ppl when they tell me stuff like i think they might be lieing. And if a guy asks me out i audimattically say no because i'm scared they were put up for a joke.

I know i'm parranoied and i want to gain more trust in people, i just would like some advise.

Oh and the spelling cheak is broken and im a c**p speller so sorry bout that.

Answer 1

I think you are worried over nothing. Let’s look at the worst case scenario and your friends tell your secrets to others. Unless you killed someone and are hiding it I’m sure your secrets are really not that big of a deal.

If they talk c**p behind your back…..who cares? I have been a leader all my life. Being a leader and usually being the one to initiate and get the group going involves some people agreeing and some not.

I started a motorcycle club and wanted to make everyone happy. After a short while I determined I can’t make everyone happy, so I will do what I like and those who like the same will be happy and those who don’t can talk bad about me. Do I care?….no, not really. Why should I.

Quit worrying about little things like this, stop focusing your attention on yourself, and unclench to let the stick out. Do these three things and you will be happier.

Secrets are usually for things you are ashamed of. If your not ashamed of yourself or what you have done you wont have secrets. Lies are for the same reason.

Answer 2

hm. well most teenagers shouldn't be trusted.

but you should have at least

one or two friends you can really

trust.

because the secrets thing is

true.

no teenager can really keep a

secret.

you just have to make

really close friends.

Answer 3

I can see why you don't trust anyone. Most teenagers aren't to be trusted. What I do is this: Whatever is going on in my "love life" persay, or even if I find myself attracted to a certain person; I tell no one about it besides maybe even my three closest friends and sometimes I even wait it out and tell no one until I'm practically going out with the girl. I think things operate better that way. And the secrets ordeal....we tell secrets in High School and stuff of our own to usually get a desired reaction. For example we had this one girl last year going around telling everyone that "she fought with her Mom all the time and she called her a s**t and her Mom told her she wants her out.....etc." We all knew it wasn't true because her Mom was like the nicest little thing in town. She just wanted the reaction from people like "Wow your a BAMF" or whatever; you know? And believe me.....I've been screwed over on multiple occasions by people who just simply get pleasure out of making a simple situation huge and seeing you turn red in the face practically sweating from embarrasment or fear. Don't fear these people  whatever you do. Regarding your friends....Try to do activities with them that are less apt to bring big personal topics to the table. Like go out and do something that you know won't lead to "Ok girls, now its time to tell our biggest secrets." In doing so you won't be pressured into revealing information you don't want to, and it will be a good time to really see if your friends are legitmate and real. Lastly, if I guy asks you out without knowing you....don't say no and run but don't say yes instantly either......get to know him if your interested and even if it was a setup or a joke.....don't be so embarrased, I know that might be hard but just punch him in the face or something to make him look like the idiot, then look him right in the eyes and say, "You are a real A$$!oL3!" You could gain so much power and respect for that, but I doubt many of the times you get asked "Wanna go out?" it won't be a setup. And do yourself a favor......just recognize the guy and be a good judge of his character, and you should be just fine.

Good Luck!

Answer 4

I have had issues, serious ones.

Sometimes it is better to get a perfect stranger form who knows where to talk about your problems, than friends who might get you ashamed, hurt, or something similar.

One fine example is you here, asking this to us instead of somebody closer home. Or your common psychologist, that at first is a stranger you pay for help.

With time, patience, and the development of common sense, you will gradually trust some people bit by bit. Sometimes when we think about something a lot we make a bigger issue of things in our head tha what it would be in real life.

Start by trusting in yourself. Then trust in others will naturally come.