I don't understand myself?

Question

I dont' understand how I feel, which I know is odd. I love my husband and I know that I would be heart broken if anything ever happened to him, but I stll somehow let myself have feelings for other people. If I love my husband so much and know that I'm never going to do anything to hurt him, then why do I feel so guilty for likeing this other guy, and why the he ll do I like this other guy?

Answer 1

i ask myself that all the time (i really love this guy but i dont want to love him but i love him anyways),

you can't really control your emotions, and especially not when you have feelings for other people.

as long as you don't get invovled with them in any way that might hurt your marriage...it's alright.

Answer 2

I wonder whether you think about how you would feel if it was the other way around?.. Your thoughts and guilt could be happing it to your husband also, How would you feel?... If a man or a woman cheats on one spouse, there is a very good chance he or she will cheat on the next woman or man in their life.



This is addicted to the clandestine nature of this type of  relationship. There is a rush in waiting for the next tryst...the next meeting. The affair distracts people from the the own life issues. It becomes like a drug used to stop pain or discomfort. Once the pain stops, there is no need for the drug. I just found out I was dating a married man.. I talked to his wife put everything in the open and RUN AWAY FROM IT.. is painful and soo dishonest to the one person who is not a cheater.

  

This is just my very honest Opinion

Answer 3

You're human. Attraction is attraction. Can't control this feeling no matter what you do. But since you're aware that you would never do anything then the attraction is ok. Does your husband know the guy? If he doesn't maybe introduce them. Perhaps the secrecy of the guy is making you  feel guilty.

Just because you're married doesn't mean you lose all interest in other people. If you know for sure that you're not missing anything in your marriage and your relationship is secure, there really shouldn't be any problem with being attracted to another guy.