I dont just WANT a baby i NEED one !!?

Question

ive figured out that if i have a baby when im 14 and find a stitter or day care for it from 8.45-10.45 then 11.00-12.40(wich ive found) i coud look after the baby and et on with school/ education,, i rele want a baby and im so close to getting one. i know what you people are gonna ay about me but i know this is gona work,,, thing is i cant find a decent boyfriend to keep for atleast 3 weeks let alone a month or more

Answer 1

Maybe ask your mom if you can get a puppy. Or maybe join the band at school or some sport to keep you busy.

Answer 2

OK, first of all, no one NEEDS  baby. They are a precious GIFT from God. Trust me, it is better to wait until you are older, married and more stable. This child deserves two parents and in today's society most young boys will run off when the girl gets pregnant. The child also deserves a mother who can give him or her the basic things he or she will need without having to depend on others. You aren't done growing up, don't force yourself to be an adult before you are ready. Trust me it will come back to bite you in the butt when you realize how much you missed out on because you were at home taking care of a baby rather than out being a kid with your friends. I know what you are thinking , you can still have fun with your friends, just leave the baby home with your mother, right? Wrong! Your mother had you, not your baby, it is YOUR responsibility to take care of that child, not your mother's ! Please do not have a baby!

Answer 3

what you need is a mental health check. no 14 year old in her right mind NEEDS a baby. think about all that you will be giving up.  and your comment about needing a father, that's just sad.  if you can't keep a boy for more than three weeks, you definately have no business being in charge of another human's life.

Answer 4

Oh, God, this is SO sad. I just hope you are joking.

Answer 5

who's paying for this sitter or daycare?  

You need to get an education for yourself and concentrate on preparing yourself for life in the real world where you can pay your own bills and be independent.  THEN, think about babies.

Answer 6

If you can't find a guy, why would you even want a baby.

Do you want someone to love you? Is that why you need one. I'm not a single mother or well not going to be anyway. But it is SOO hard to be one. And then dating after, guys are jerks and can be jerks to a baby. I was reading this other question and some boyfriend was taking a bear away from a five year old, that he loved and was hiding it. Where was the mom when this was happening? You need to rethink it. I'm 16 and pregnant. I am going to make this work. Yeah It was so not planned. But, I have already went through a lot in life and I had to grow up fast, not just for the baby, but because of the stuff I went through.

Re think it. It is definatly no fun being a single mother, paying for EVERYTHING. Its better when you wait and find someone you LOVe to have a family with. You should be commited. For the babies sake and YOURs.

Answer 7

Pippin - I couldn't have said it better.

This question is rediculous.  I hope you don't find a boyfriend.  You can't just "get" a baby.  And you certainly don't get "a lifetime of babylove".  Babies aren't babies forever.  You must not be getting the attention or love you need at home if you feel you need a baby to love you.

You need to talk to your parents, and redirect your need to care for something elsewhere.  Like, a fish or another small low maintenance pet.  Or better yet, volunteer at an animal shelter.  You'll be doing the community a service and you get all the unconditional love from the animals you can handle.

At your age, I wasn't even THINKING about babies!  All I was interested in was playing outside and not having to do homework!  What is up with kids these days?  Oy vey.

Man, do I hate questions like this.  But it does convince me that I will monitor my children's computer usage so I can try to ward off potential catastrophies like these.

EDIT:  Maybe you should watch that new show "Baby Borrowers".  You should start babysitting (with supervision - maybe go with someone who is experienced and learn).  You should also watch a PBS documentary on giving birth - babies don't come from storks or cabbage patches.  They come from a very hard process of labor and physical strength.  And it's far far from pretty.  And come to think of it - having a child at your age (you're not even 14 yet!) is dangerous - your body is not ready for that kind of work.  Just because the plumbing is working doesn't mean the house is ready to occupy.

Answer 8

Wow do ypur parents know about this

Answer 9

holy c**p

think about this- how are you going to take your baby to doctors appointments when your not even old enough to drive? i mean come on... when you have the baby 2 weeks later you got to take it to the doctor, then a few weeks later you gotta go again

think before you do this

Answer 10

This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Once you have a baby, you'll have it for the rest of your life. That means it can wait. And I'm pretty sure you'll want to have one with someone you want to be with forever, not some random guy you've been dating three weeks.

Answer 11

You are kidding, right?

When you are 14 you will be in the 8th grade.  How do you expect to support a child?  You can't get a job at that age, let alone work while you are in school and caring for an infant.

And having a baby ISN'T just about having a baby.  Babies grow up.  When  your baby is no longer 'a baby' will you decide to have another? And then another?   When your 'baby' is starting kindergarten and you are still in school yourself, how will that work?  (Will you ride the school bus together?  How cute.)

You have your whole life to have kids.  You only have a few years to be a teen-ager yourself.  Enjoy it.

EDIT: "A lifetime of babylove?"   Do you have ANY idea what being a parent is all about?  Do you have ANY idea what it takes (money, committment, sacrifice) to raise a child?  Yeah, you'll get a couple of years of 'unconditional' love from your baby.  You'll also have years of sleepless nights as you struggle to balance full-time work (probably of the mnimum wage variety) with daycare costs and the needs of your child. You'll have the humiliation of having people look at you in disgust as you pay for your groceries with food stamps and WIC coupons.  

If you need something to love, get a goldfish. (I'd say get a puppy, but puppies require a lot of care too.)

If you aren't mature enough to know what you are letting yourself into, you are definitely not mature enough to be mother.

Answer 12

Come on, you really need to grow up before having a baby.

Answer 13

Think it over, how are you going to pay for everything?

And you won't see the baby if you're at school all day.

The baby NEEDS its mum and you won't be around enough.

Answer 14

As glamorous as it may sound to you it isn't all that easy.  My sister was 15 when she became pregnant and left her childhood behind there.  She worked full time and graduated early to support her own child.  It wasn't easy for her but she did what she had to for her son.  She did not get government assistance because she felt responsible to do it herself.  Her boyfriend?.....ya he took off and that was that.  You found someone to watch your child while you went to school?!  What about work?  To have a baby and make the government pay for it is not right!  If you want this you need to realize what is in store for you!  They need to go to the doctors regularly, they get sick alot and that means alot of sleepless nights and attention that you used to get.  They need clothes and food and formula.  The need a routine and a schedule which means while your friends go out and have fun you stay home!  That cute outfit you want to buy becomes the food and bills you have to pay!  What you want no longer matters!  What you need no longer matters!  You are really not thinking this through!  What happens if by chance there a problems?!  I was 22 when I had my daughter and even at that age I was not prepared to take care a child w/needs.  It was so hard and my man was there!  She never slept and cried and there was nothing I could do!  I am not saying you wouldn't love it but emotionly you can't be prepared at that age for something like that.  I spent years in and out of hospitals I lost my job because I put her first.  Had I been in school there is no way I would have been able to graduate.  Rethink it.  It isn't a puppy you can take to the pound, give away or neglect when it gets tough.  It's a lifetime commentment.  I would never regret having my daughter she is now a healthy happy six year old but if I would have waited just a few more years I would have been more financially and emotionly more stabel to handle have a sick child.  Get yourself stable first.  A college education and good man and have a family.  It makes all the more difference in their life to have that stability.  My mom was a young single mother and was wonderful.  But she worked three jobs to take care of us and my dad took off.  I was happy but never understood why he didn't want me.  It took adulthood to understand is wasn't my fault but trust me you don't want that question from your child it is painful,  just ask my sister.  I commend both my mother and sister for their sacrifices they gave to provide for their children but don't do it purposely.  Give your child a chance at a family and life where you can be there not at work 12 hours day just to provide for them.  Please just think about it before you not only sacrifice your childhood but another child's chance at a stable, healthy, happy life.

Answer 15

i'm confused- you're 14 and want a baby!!!!!

Answer 16

what you NEED is a good kick in the ***...how are you gonna support a baby? you cant even spell half way decent and you think you are ready for a baby...YOU are still a BABY yourself...

Answer 17

Have you told your parents? and i was a 17 when i had my son so i cant moan about it but it sounds like you jut want a baby so you have someone to love and your baby will love you and hunny it don't work like that. You need to find a man that want you and wants to have a baby and will stay around and look after you both because it is the hardest job in the world to bring a baby up. And its not fair on the baby if it doesn't have a dad that is there for it and cares for it. babies need alot of attention,care,money,love,time,routine,h... environment i mean where will you live? I'm not saying you wont be a good mum but they are not a toy or a possession they are a little human being. so please just think about it the age isn't a major problem its not being in a stable relationship because your baby gonna have different men come into there life as there daddy and then go again and that's how my childhood was and i wouldn't wish that on anyone. THINK.

Answer 18

Your spelling is poor, and you're barely in  high school, you don't need to have a baby. If you were my daughter and I found out you were doing this, I'd sow up your v****a!

Answer 19

why do you NEED a baby?!  

Your baby will NEED way more than you can give it... sorry honey, wait 10 years!

There's no good reason on earth that a girl your age should have a baby!

Answer 20

Your question topic is the one reason why you shouldn't have a baby. When you say you "need" a baby, that baby is being born with a job, and that job is keeping you happy and filling a void in your life. Why would you want to bring a child into the world with so much responsibility already? It should be the other way around - you want a baby because it needs YOU not that you need it. Babies should NOT be brought into this world with a job already set out for them - to make someone else happy. They aren't aware of it but it's still NOT FAIR, and they do become aware of it when they are older and that is just not a good way to live life.

You are 14 and it is very natural to only care about your own needs, that's how 14 year olds think, its how you're supposed to think. Do not bring a child into your life when you are in such a self-centrered time of your life (I'm not calling you self centered but teenagers do not have the part of the brain that puts oothers needs ahead of their own, so it's technically called self centeredness).

It is beautiful that you want a child, and that you aspire to be a mom one day - that is a great dream to have. But please, for the baby's sake, wait until you are old enough and have someone to share the experience with. I'm not saying you wouldn't be a good mom now because you very well may be, but if you wait until you are financially, physically, emotionally, mentally, and cognitively ready to have a baby, you will be THAT much BETTER a mom. Please wait, it will be worth it in the end I promise.

Everything that's worth it in life is worth waiting for.

Answer 21

haha na you dont need a baby..at all....you will never be able to have fun...please dont do this to yourself

Answer 22

YOU DON'T NEEEEEED A BABY!! BABIES SHOULDN'T HAVE BABIES!!! If you were smart wait till you are older!! Till you have your own house, your own bills, your own life!! Be a kid!! Get a good education!! Watch the Baby Borrowers!!! DO NOT HAVE A BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Get a dog!!!! Talk to your Mom, bc I would put a chassity belt on you and lock you in your room!! Thank god I have a boy!!!!

I knew a girl who had a baby when she was 14.. its stupid by the time the baby was 1 yrs. old she was giving him up for adoption, bc she wanted to go party and be a kid! Your only a kid for a little bit of your life but your an adult forever!!!!

Answer 23

I am 25 and know I am still not ready!  Please think this over.

Answer 24

What you need is psychiatric help, because you obviously have emotional issues and feel unloved. Please get help before you do something stupid.

Answer 25

No sweetheart, what you need is mental help and a serious reality check. You have no idea what having a baby at 14 will do to not only you, but the poor child. Try to think about someone other than yourself. If you feel the need to take care of something, get a puppy.

Answer 26

How are you planning on paying for this sitter?  What about food for the child?  Where will you live?  What if the baby needs to go to the doc you can't drive.  I would wait a few years.  Your not old enough to live on your own and you want to have a child.  Just think about it.  Babies aren't just little cute fun things, they pee and p**p and cry and grow up to be toddlers who cry pee and p**p and yell and scream and then to the stage where they don't listen to you then teenagers oh my when they want a baby!  You don't even know what its like to be 16 you have no idea its not all fun and games and it is expensive.  Go to babycenter.com and look up the price of raisng a baby and of raising a child.  This may change your mind.

Answer 27

Sorry dear, but you are no where near responsible enough to take care of a baby.  You are still a baby yourself.  If you can't support yourself, it would be wrong to bring a life into the world.  Can you get a job? The answer is no, you are too young.  Can you get a place of your own? The answer is no, you are too young.  Can you buy formula, diapers, medicine, pay for check ups, etc. without having to have mommy and daddy or the state do it for you?  The answer is no again, you are too young.  Concentrate on making a great life for yourself, getting a good education, going on to college and getting a great paying career.  That way later on in life you will be able to afford a baby and spoil it rotten.

After reading your second response I have come to the conclusion that not only are you still a child, but you are also very immature for your age.  You have no business having a baby.  I don't think anything anyone on here says will change your mind, because I can tell you are going to get pregnant regardless.  I think its not only sad, but I would hope that social services in your area step in and take the baby.  It would be the best thing they could do.  You are too self absorbed and immature to handle being the mom you would need to be.