I dont know what Im doing.?

Question

a short while ago i found out my husband was lying to me, I was so angry that I threatened divorce, for 10 days ive been at war with him. each day screaming and tearing him down in the hopes of getting some emotion out of him. I told him i hated him and at the time i did but I was never serious about a divorce. Hes on deployment right now and i haven't seen him for 5 months and he claims those 5 months changed him. its about 2 days before he comes back into town and yesterday he told me that hes not sure about marriage and wants to be alone. He doesn't want to answer to anyone. we have two children and have been married for 4 years, in a relationship for 9. Do you think he is really done with us or is he blowing smoke. How do I fix this now that its gone this far? also how should I receive him when he comes back- with a hand shake or with a kiss. I am truly torn here.

Answer 1

i hope u dont do that again. when a man lying thats means the woman is important to him. when he comes back tell him u love him so much thats why u r angry.tell him u r wrong to do,u will try to change. do what he like when making love,u must service him,dont let him do the job. next time he make u angry try to hug him tight n kiss him. u will feel better. try it.

Answer 2

You two need to sit down and talk this out. Not fight and argue, but talk. If this relationship is going to work. The point is that you are not in the wrong here if he truly did lie to you then he is. You are the one who is always going to have that in the back of your mind about a man you are living with. Can you handle that? Cuz if you cant then you may as well not even try to resolve these issues that are going on with your relationship. But if you want to resolve it, you cant keep throwing that back in his face either. So take that into consideration. Then make a decision as to what you are going to do.

Answer 3

Well one thing I know is being away fro the situation on a deployment can do 2 things make you realize that you really love that person. Or make you realize it's not going to work. I went through the same thing while I was gone I finally realized how unhappy I was. I say if you really wanna make it work try to talk about it not yell just talk. When he gets back try to get it back to the way it was when you were happy together get back to that honeymoon faze. Ask family members or friends if you can to help with the kids so you can save the marriage. Also look into marriage counseling with the chaplain. I say you hug him when he gets back regardless you have a kids together and married and follow his lead. And make sure you look hot when he gets there. Hope that helps I'm in the army so I know your pain.  

Answer 4

Hugs and kisses...and more hugs and kisses....find a sitter for your child and give him a night he won't soon forget!   tell him that you don't care about the past...he said she said stuff..today is a new day!!  now ROCK it!. .your man needs some TLC..give it without expecting anything in return...best wishes for you and yours :0)

Answer 5

wow we both have some issues with anger. I think you have to apologize for your children's sake. It depends on what he was lying about though. If he was cheating on you or something its appropriate. 10 days is enough, either choose to divorce him or keep him. Don't make this torchure keep going on. You need to end the fight one way or another.

Answer 6

You are really in trouble for threaten him and for giving her war for 10 days that was pretty bad, it shows you can't control your anger, it hasn't been the first time he sees you behavior so aggressively

During the time he was gone he had time to realize that your love and behavior wasn't enough, that life should be deeper in love, and all she might want is a new beginning with out you and just his kids.

Life is a learning lessons: you did your anger act and you affected him. He has his mind made up, so no matter how you receive him when he shakes your hand, he already knows what to do.