I farted on my honeymoon night-repeatedly?

Question

Beans at the reception - disaster for me.

I am mortified and now my husband acts distant and not attracted to me anymore. This was one month ago and I also had some diarrhea all over the sheets. He say ' marriage isn't s**y' and walks out of room.

how can I be s**y to him again, ?

Answer 1

Well, things like this happen. Just wait until he gets ill or food poisoning or drinks a little too much and you will see him in some horrible positions over the garbage, toilet, floor ect ect ect.  

Answer 2

Sorry to say that your husband needs to grow up.  

People f**t.  That's just how it is.  They pee and p**p and barf and burp.  Lots of bodily functions that we don't find particularly attractive.  So what.  Watching people eat can be pretty unappetizing too but that's life.

Your husband sounds incredibly selfish.  Rather than consoling you for your discomfort and helping you to feel less embarrassed about the accident, he chooses to belittle you and say that 'marriage isn't s**y'.

He needs to realize that real life isn't always s**y.  Being alone is even less s**y.

If he's like this now, what's he going to say when you are pregnant and the size of a walk-up apartment building?  What about when he sees the child being born?  What about when his son or daughter throws up or needs a diaper change?  What about when his Mom is dying and her body is giving up the ghost?

Pardon the rant but this kind of more-precious-than-you attitude really burns me up.  Be glad he's not here with me right now or he would get some kind of earful.

Answer 3

Kewl!  You are writing for a soap opera.  Good luck.

Answer 4

I believe you are making this up! hahaha

Answer 5

slip him a laxative and make him suffer. muah hahaha!

Answer 6

If he doesn't understand that $hit happens he must be a real JERK!!! Try explaining what caused this event and assure him that this was a one time mishap and that this has been tough for you and you would like to have a second Honeymoon Night.Stay away from the beans.

Answer 7

lol,  he need to grow up things happen if this is true.  how old are you?  If you afre young you should have more control over your bowels  if your older then so is your hubby and  **** happens.

Answer 8

lol!!!! if i did do that my fiance wouldn't walk out on me. he will actually laugh about it

Answer 9

There was a line in one of my favorite shows (Freaks and Geeks) that summed up what I was looking for in a relationship quite nicely. It was something like "True love is being able to f**t in bed." It sounds gross, but true love really is being comfortable with each other and being able to be together through everything. This is the person that is supposed to be by your side through everything, you had a nasty moment early in your marriage but there will be more. He will have to get used to it.

You may never be as s**y as you once were to him. You are now his wife and the potential mother of his future children. There are many other things to look forward to that are better than sexiness, but there are ways to spice things up. I am not sure what he is into, but there are some very easy things that may help a little. Don't feel like you have to do anything you aren't comfortable with, these are only suggestions and you need to stay in your comfort zone. Buy some s**y lingerie, ask him to pick it or surprise him with it. Go to an adult store together, there are some really gross ones out there but if you look you can find some relatively classy ones. This can be risky because many people have unspoken weird desires, but ask him if he has any fantasies he hasn't told you about.

No matter what you do, if anything, don't feel bad for getting sick. It isn't your fault, and he should be able to realize it. It is OK to get grossed out, but hopefully you both work out a way to deal with life’s messes.

Answer 10

you will never be s**y again. you might as well keep eating beans and keep farting. and maybe hire a hooker once in a while for your hubby.

Answer 11

Farts happen. To EVERYONE. Him included.

Answer 12

You liar!

hahaha.

Answer 13

lol!