I feel empty but LIKE it?

Question

Ok, so basically 80% of my day I feel empty. Other ways to describe it is calm, normal, sad, nothing. These are what some people have said. to describe it to someone I would say when they are staring off into space and feel nothing in particular. That's not how it is for me but many people.

Anyways. I have seen a therapist and was really good at telling him everything. He couldn't figure out what was wrong. I think I puzzled him.

I am NOT depressed. I know that much. I go day by day feeling nothing. The other 20% include confusion, happiness and tired. I don't feel fun. Like I go with people and they have fun, but I don't. But, I sorta like it. What I mean is there are good things. Like, I don't get jealous, angry or sad. I like not feeling these things. It makes life simple. Someone told me I am like a earthquake monitor. The line stays straight with occasional flickers up.

What I want to know is is this ok. Many relatives of mine are worried about me.

If this helps.......I am a 13 year old girl. My grandma died in January and I didn't feel anything. I noticed the emptiness in the end of June when my friend told me her dad has cancer and I did not feel sad or bad for her. I think it has been happening mainly sense my g-ma's death but started before that(she had been slowly dieing for two years).

Can I live feeling nothing? I rank second in my class(idk if this helps). I don't consider myself smart but everyone else does. I like being alone but don't mind being around people. I do stuff with my best friend because my mom bugs me about it.

Answer 1

Your like the same as me, it's weird but I feel like life is just soo routine that is lost it's spark to me so these days all I do is watch as it goes by. No I'm not depressed I have fun at times and but It's like I'm in a constant non-emotional state it may be me subconsciously thinking something thus creating a trance or something like that. It's as if life is going on and you just dont want to catch up with it. My resolution to this was God, occassionaly these days ive been thinking about god more and it sort of makes me less empty despite me liking the empty feeling. Doing meaningless activities is great when feeling empty.

Answer 2

I think feeling empty or content is better than feeling alone and suicidal, My husband is one of those people where it takes alot to stir any kind of emotion not really a bad thing because he is always a very level headed person. The only negative thing is he's unemotionally attached to everything. I love him to death and I know he loves me he just doesn't express it well. I think you'll go far in life with this attitude, he did!

Answer 3

Subconsciously your g-ma was your mother figure and when she went you went. You should find something that gives meaning to your life. Transform your feelings into an art form. It could be art, writing, or some other form of healthy and productive form of art.