I feel like the parent :(?

Question

Hi guys!

I'm 14 years old, and my family and I (Mom, Dad and Me) just moved into our very first house! We are very proud of it and are very excited. But for me, I feel very stressed. :(

I honestly feel like the parent instead....my friend and I were weed picking in the backyard and frontyard while my dad and mom were inside renovating. My dad made such a careless mistake, that he had to call me in. I felt the pressure because they were ALL relying on me. Now that that's fix I am using my own money that I am saving up for a dog towards the backyard. Since it is a very " crappy " yard and needs a lot of intense fixing, I have to go out tomorrow and buy around 50 or 60 bucks worth of top soil and get some grass seeds.

I feel like the parent because all my mom is doing is whining and saying " Ugh I hate the backyard I want this, I want that, do something to it, and hurry up with it! " So what I am doing tomorrow is going out to buy this book on how to make a paved cement

Answer 1

I think you should sit your parents down and explain to them that you are the kid and your only job is to focus on school and take care of some chores and that doesn't include re-doing the backyard out of your own pocket.

Answer 2

I've been in so many situations where I've felt like the "parent"--with my parents AND my siblings. I'm the youngest (I'm 13--turning 14 in May), and I have a sister thats 18, and a brother that's 17.

My dad's sick constantly (he's a diabetic, and can't walk) and my mom's both clinically depressed (the doctor at "Open Door" says she is 'OK' and won't prescribe anything) and constantly stressed. My sister's away at college, and when she is home she doesn't deal with any of the problems. And my brother, is usually out with friends so he can run away from the problems at home. I'm usually the one, who makes sure everything runs smoothly in the house. When my mum and dad are both sick it is me who makes the meals, goes grocery shopping, and makes sure everybody has everything they need. But it's been like that, for as long as I can remember. I already know now that I'll be the one who takes care of everybody later on, because my siblings can't deal with it. It's both a blessing (it makes me the favorite child [: ) and a curse.

But enough about me. I understand what you mean about feeling like the parent, but what I can suggest is, be optimistic and negotiate it with your parents. You want a dog, they want a new lawn--estimate how much it would cost to have a contractor do the lawn, figure in supplies and time, and create a figure you can show your parents. If you do the work (I'd suggest doing it with friends, because the work will go faster that way!) then they get you a dog, and supplies for the pup (leash, collar, training book, etc.) . It's a great business-type initiative, and everybody should end up happy.

Good luck with the work & I'm sure a new puppy would go nicely with your new home (congrats, btw!). :]

EDIT:

If you want to create good relationships with your neighbors (You said you've seen them do it) then ask if they'll show you how. It's a great way to become friendly, with the 'hood. :]

EDIT #2:

What keeps me going, is the secret tingling Super-Man feeling I get from being the all-dependable. It makes me feel invincible, lol. And it's nice to know sometimes that you're needed.. :]

EDIT #3:

Aww..thanks. :] I know, most kids I know would never give up something that is important to them (new clothes, going out with friends, money, what ever) for their family. My parents are also very supportive--and the good thing about being the parent every once in awhile, is that they cut you some slack and sometimes will grant you little "extras" (like my dad occasionally picks me up early from school, to take me out for ice-cream). Siblings aren't too bad, lol, they can sometimes be useful (like when it comes to needing someone to drive you someplace)...But not very often. =P

You are exactly right--the world DOES need more love and compassion. It sometimes seems that in the rush of caring about their own life, people forget about others. How else do you explain, the people who drive down roads 90 mph, racing to get to a meeting or a date? I think that caring for others, is something that is slowly slipping away from society--and it's good to know that you and I won't be contributing to the loss of kindness in the future. :]

EDIT #4:

Aww..:[

Well, it's good to have neighbors who want to lend a helping hand! One of my neighbors tries to let his police dog scare me by letting him snarl (and the 140 pounds beast weighs more then me!). Luckily, my two pups come to my defense most of the time, and give him a much meaner growl (One's forty pounds, and the other is eight! God do they scare the police dog!) . :]

EDIT #5:

I should try the dog treat thingy next time Blake comes around..:]

Hehe, well, I have a 9 week old Jack Russel Terrier/Beagle mix, and a 7 year old English Springer Spaniel. :]

Aww..Brittany Spaniels are adorable. Nine years is a long time..All the pups my family has ever gotten has been spur of the moment type thing. :]

OMG. You're right about the song.

And I added you to my Messenger contacts. I look forward to talking to you later. [;

I'll talk to you later on Messenger..Right now I have to go to sleep..I have to wake up at 7:30 to babysit for a family friend tomorrow! :x

Have a nice night. :]