I feel so bad for my friend.... am I crazy, or is this guy extremely rude?

Question

My friend has been hounding a crush on a guy that goes to our school for quite some time. Now, even I will admit, she's not the most gorgeous person around, but she's not ugly!

Anyway, she finally got the courage to ask this guy out. He laughed and said, "No way, I'm offended that someone that looks like you would ask me out!!" And then, he told his friend about it in 7th period (the friend is across the isle, so he had to lean across me to talk), so I couldn't help but eavesdrop, and I was shocked! My friend was too embarrassed to talk :(

What has society come to???

Answer 1

The comment was rude, yes, but if the guy is otherwise polite and well-mannered, perhaps she did something to provoke it.  Perhaps she failed to recognize a subtle hint he was trying to send.   Or, she was coming on too strong or persistently, and he felt he needed to be rude in order for her to back off.  Without actually having been there, I cannot say for sure.  

Answer 2

Boys have been behaving like this forever. I have a friend that experienced pretty much the same thing 35 years ago and it has bothered her all these years. The boy that said the horrible things to her grew up to be a child psychologist of all things! She confronted him last year about his long ago comments and he didn't even remember the note that led to the comments or anything about the conversation that was so hurtful to her. He apologized over and over and they have become friends again, but it doesn't negate the fact that he totally crushed her and her self esteem and she never fully recovered from it.

It is so sad that people don't realize what long term effect their words can have on other people. I can't imagine saying something like that to another person. This boy evidently isn't as nice as you think or he's got some serious issues that he needs to work on. Sadly your friend will probably have issues herself thanks to him.

Answer 3

What a creep.  She should focus on better guys.  

Answer 4

I think it showed a lot of guts for her to ask him out, that's never an easy thing to do (although with practice it sometimes gets easier as you get older).

He was definitely out of line by acting that way. There's no reason to be so mean when turning someone down is already a painful rejection.

But it's probably for the best. He may be super polite, funny and an all-around nice guy most of the time, but evidently it's all superficial. Better she find out now than after dating him for a while and getting attached.

This reflects on his character way more than it does on her appearance. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and all he did was prove to you and your friend that he's rude, superficial and completely inconsiderate towards other people's feelings.

What's up with the comment? He's probably just someone insecure who wanted to seem cool in front of his friends.

Well don't worry, one day his friends won't be around anymore and he won't be such a bigshot. By then your friend will be over him and probably dating someone who cares much more for who she is as a person.

Tell her she's beautiful and congratulate her on asking him out. Now that she's worked up that courage she'll have practice for when it's time to ask a guy out who's worth her time ;)

Answer 5

Honestly,

you shouldn't even care about this jerk and neither should she!

But you know what...you should have some fun in this...

Do exactly what the guy 2 spaces above says:

user cousinbonehead

Honestly that guy deserves that!

Answer 6

there can be two sides to this guy. you can never say that a guy is always nice and polite because it isnt true. she should keep her head up high and ignore those rude comments. Besides hes not the only guy in this world

Answer 7

Super polite?  Both that and what you described don't exist in the same person, do they?

Your friend needs to realize that she'll do much better than him, and probably without trying all that hard.  This sounds like she's smart and lovely, and he is a fool for being ignorant of those facts.

She needs to move on and realize that the guy is not worth her time.  She doesn't need to be snobbish about it, of course, but she doesn't need him for a friend, either.  He obviously doesn't know how to be a friend.

Answer 8

Well, he's been  conning you, apparently.  He is shallow, and self centered.

No way is he an all-around nice guy!

Answer 9

Here is what you and your friend need to do. I can guarantee, it will work. Ok, you both need to laugh your *** off at this guy EVERYTIME you see him. Basically, for one reason: he is freaking primadonna! What guy says he's 'too good' for a girl? The more your spread the primadonna rumor around, the less he may think of himself as being 'too good'. Further, it's hilarious that a guy would think of himself that way. He probably is going out with the reflection in the mirror. Seriously. When his birthday comes up, send him a cheap mirror. And get as many of your friends to do the same for the boy who is 'too good' for someone. What a dork he must be. lol. 'I'M TOO GOOD FOR YOU'. Laugh at it. Because in a couple years, you will anyway. He's a joke. What a girly man he is. lol.  

Answer 10

You see after snorting a bunch of cocaine there is a stage afterwards where you need to punch someone really really hard... definitely an addict..