I feel so guilty! What should I do?

Question

I love my husband with all of my heart, but sometimes when I am alone a lot. I start thinking about other guys. I have several male friends and have never done anything with any of them, but sometimes I am tempted. Is it wrong?

Answer 1

Temptation is always going to be there... Just make sure not to act on it. Because your husband may not be what you want today because he didn't do this or that.... but then tomorrow hes the man of your dreams because he finished this or that....

Remember the man you chose and all is fine.

Answer 2

Yes, it's wrong. Vows exist for a reason. If you aren't ready for that, you should divorce him and make him your boyfriend.

Answer 3

No it's not wrong. Maybe your just not getting enough from your husband,weather if it's s*x or just the emotional connection it sounds like something is missing between the two of you. Do you think that maybe that could be the reason your having these feelings? Good Luck!

Answer 4

i dont think theres anything wrong with that at all.  

Answer 5

well ditch the male friends...point blank

Answer 6

yes.  It is wrong to have these thoughts.  Continue to feel guilty.

Answer 7

You really want us to tell you to s***w one or all of your friends don't you that would make you feel better wouldn't it?  Well i don't know you so go a head and do it if you want let them train you no sweat off my a. have fun.

Btw to answer your ? you know it's wrong if you don't you are a complete imbecile

Answer 8

No, it's only because your not getting it from your husband.  I do that too when it's been a while.  

Answer 9

Stop thinking so much. Occupy your time with other things.

Read, answer questions on YA, puzzles, go to the gym, go to a movie.

Answer 10

You should never be lonely is all i got to say.

If i was your friend you wouldn't be.

want to be friends?

Answer 11

The Bible says that thinking about it is the same as doing it.  If you fantasize about having s*x with another guy, you may as well have had s*x with them.  This is called LUST.  It's wrong.

When you find yourself lusting after another, find something else to do...pray, get busy doing something else.  An idle hand is a tool that's easily used by the devil!

God bless you, Darlin'.  I'll keep you in my prayers.

Answer 12

Yes. You need to focus all of your attention on your manly husband. Cook for him, clean and pick up for him, massage him nightly and always give him his needs and you will keep him happy.  

Answer 13

It would be wrong to do anything with them, but it's normal for people to think about other people.  

Answer 14

I think that all of us at one point think about another opposite s*x. As long as you don't act on it you are not wrong. It is easier to think that the grass is greener on the other side but it isn't always that way and can be more trouble than it is worth.  

Answer 15

As long as you don't act on it, no.  It's natural to fantasize and when your husband isn't around a lot of course you are going to.  Just don't do anything that will endanger your relationship with your husband.  

Answer 16

Temptation is never wrong, it is the subsequent giving into those temptations that is wrong.  

I would cut off the thoughts of those other men as soon as they come to you.  Refocus on your husband and why you love him.  Dwell on the things that make him special to you.  

Honestly, I would also avoid being in situations where you are tempted (being with your male friends). Don't add fuel to the fire!  :)

Answer 17

Stop now b/c it could end in disaster later! Dreaming is not bad but you are in a different situation now - it may have started out as dreaming about other men but now you abviously you have thoughts on cheating other wise you wouldn't have brought this question here... And if you haven't done anything wrong yet you are about to other wise you wouldn't be feeling guilty now would you? Good luck and be strong he works hard and you really should limit your male friends now before it's too late what do you want do you want a divorce do you want to be a cheating wife? It's all in your hands and only you can do something about it...

Answer 18

When we take a vow, we vow to love and stick by our mates for better, and for worst.  Well, right now you are going through a difficult time, because you're not spending time with your mate.  When we use our minds, and imagine things, at first it may seem as if it's innocent.  But your mind controls your body.  If you use your mind to imagine these things, then yes, sooner or later you would be tempted, and you will re-act.  If your visions impose on to your heart, then eventually, YOU WILL do something you'll regret. Baby girl, your heart is the root to MOTIVATION. Try to focus on something that is going to improve your relationship with your husband, because you are definitely focusing on something that is going to destroy it.

Answer 19

That is NOT emotional cheating!  Emotional cheating is when a man gets close to a woman and shares his emotions with her instead of his wife. There is no s*x involved. You are probably just fantasizing.  There is nothing wrong with that.  As long as your husband is the only one you sleep with it is fine.  Actually, it is good to fantasize. Just take out the fantasy on your man!

Answer 20

what i think that, to me it's not that bad. its wrong, but not really really wrong. why don't you have a sincere talk with your husband and talk it out with him. try thinking of you husband when you are tempted or have a really good picture of you and him and at the time you really loved him. like your wedding picture and then you won't get tempted.

Answer 21

~This is something called "emotional cheating". I dont think its wrong as all. I heard from a doctor on tv that its actually normal for a person in a relationship to sometimes have these thoughts. Just make sure not to let it get to the extent in which you are actually cheating on him with a person that you have once thought about.~

Answer 22

The fleeting thought is not wrong.  But if you feed those thoughts, dwell on them, and let them take up a more permanent place in your head, that is wrong and very dangerous.

Instead of feeling guilty, take some positive steps to protect your marriage.  Every time you think about some other man, remind yourself of something you like about your husband and stop and think of something nice to do for him.  

Would he like a special meal at dinner?  Would he enjoy you rubbing or scratching his back?  Would he appreciate an encouraging note on the mirror in the morning?  Is it time for some new, s**y underwear to surprise him?  

Plan something nice and then carry out the plan.  That will help you refocus your thoughts and energy where it belongs--on your husband.

Another way to step out to protect your marriage is to set some boundaries that will keep you from ever doing anything inappropriate with one of your male friends.  For example, don't ever be alone with an adult male in a private place; stick to public places or groups of friends.  If you need to ride alone with a male friend somewhere, then call your husband and tell him where you are and when to expect you.  This is not for your husband but for you.  It will help to keep you "honest" if you don't allow or create any opportunities for a possible "bad decision" or fall.  

Protect yourself and your marriage.  Put energy and time into your marriage.  And then you won't need to bother with feeling guilty.

Answer 23

You can't stop having feelings about anyone. As for acting on them that's something that you will have to deal with later on if you do. I would assume the being alone a lot has to do with your husband out of town or he has other things hes doing, perhaps it's time to let him know that being alone isn't what you want and that you would like him to be around more and if you like the being alone then I guess having the thoughts will eventually lead to something else as well....good luck

Answer 24

Technicaly it's wrong. It's called Lusting. Sometimes your desire may become so strong that you will be very temped to act on it. Keep your thoughts at bay and don't let them get too strong. Even though you love your husband you may not be able to control your actions if you end up in a tempting situation one day!

Answer 25

You would be smart to spend your time thinking about ways to make your marriage better. If you spend lots of time thinking about something, that  is where you will put your efforts. So if you want to keep your marriage you should put your efforts in that direction. No marriage is exciting or fulfilling all the time. So if you got with another guy eventually you would be thinking about still another and so on. It really is just a matter of choice.