I feel so guilty charging my bro in law to babysit his children?

Question

Hi. I babysit my husband's brothers 5 year old daughter and 22 month old son because him and his wife both work. I only have them from Tuesdays-Fridays, from 9:30am-7:00pm. I feel so guilty, though, because both of them really are in so much debt its pathetic, that they are always paying their rent late etc.Since i recentlty gave birth to a now 5 month old and am a stay at home mom, they asked if i could take care of their children for the summer, just untl the children go back to school. I said yes because i know how their economic situation is and i felt like they really needed my help, so that they can work extra hours to get back on their feet. They insist on paying me100 dls a week but i feel so guilty because i really love my niece and nephew and i babysit them out of love, and really feel bad accepting money because i feel like my in law could use it to pay off debt that really needs to be payed off. What do you think?

Answer 1

OK, here is what you do.  Take the 100.00 a week they give you and put it away for them and give it to them after the summer is over!  It makes you feel great and it helps them out!  I wouldn't tell them though...let it be a surprise!!

Answer 2

hey first off everyone has bills to pay and if you have a child it is your resposiblity no one else to provide for it and so they are paying you.  It is great that you can, being family makes it better for the kids but you arent charging them more than they would have to pay out at day care and it can be twice as much.  A day care charges around 65 per child and up depending on state and such. If they are struggling that bad you could tell them a little less would be fine.

Answer 3

Its obvious you have a wonderful relationship with your niece and nephew. You understand that your Brother-In- law and his wife are having financial troubles and the economy isn't making things easier on them. I suggest you stop charging them. They need every penny they can get and they both are working hard to put clothes on their kids backs. I understand you recently had a baby so you may not have a lot of energy to watch after all those children but remember this. When it comes to times like this remember that you all are FAMILY and FAMILIES look out for one another. Say if you were in his shoes.....

I agree with you on suggesting for him to use that money to pay off his debts. It's totally up to you though... I wouldn't take the money but if you had to have some kind of payment you could accept something less then $100.

Keep positive things will get better for you and your family.

Answer 4

yup..its pathetic...explain to them that you're babysitting them out of love and because of this don't let them pay ...... you already know and understand their situation

Answer 5

use the money and buy stuff

for their kids

NOW ARENT YOU SMART?

becuz deep down you really wana take dat money

Answer 6

I think that's extremely generous of you to want to do it for free, as it is a lot of your time and you do have to feed them and things.  Maybe you could use the money to give something back to them, like buy the kids clothes for the next season, like start buying them fall/winter clothes, or buy something they need for their house.  That way you don't insult them or hurt their pride by refusing money, but you're kind of giving it back to them.

Answer 7

Don't make the poor people pay!

Answer 8

I think that a daycare facility would charge them between 1000 and 2000 per month, I think that you are doing them a favor

Answer 9

if they are both working and can afford to pay you that much for looking after their kids - they should be able to pay their own bills.

BUT

if you really want to help them why not keep half the money and put half away and when you know that they have a bill to pay offer them some of their 'babysitting' money to pay the bill - that way they are still paying you to look after their kids and you won't feel so guilty.

Answer 10

WELL YOU SHOULD BE BLUDY GUILTY!

Answer 11

Well, you should tell them that you don't need the money from them, and you understand their financial situation, and you're babysitting them out of love. If they say they're still gonna do it, try to persuade them to give you less money..like $50.00 or so.

Answer 12

If you feel guilty, don't accept the money; it IS probably expensive for you to be feeding 2 more kids, maybe just ask, instead of money, if they could pack the kids a lunch, then you would only have to worry about dinner, and it wouldn't be so expensive.

Or just say, instead of money, they could babysit your 5month old once a week so you and your husband can go on a date? There are probably a lot of ways they could help you out that doesn't involve money!  Then, they would have an extra $100/week, and you wouldn't feel so guilty!

Answer 13

If you don't want to take their money and you want to respect their need to pay you something, then you can alway barter services that they have the ability to give you in lieu of money. This way they are paying and you are getting paid and everybody is happy. But I would write up an agreement so that they know you are serious about getting paid since they really want to pay you. Or you could take their money and invest it in something that could help them in the long run.

Answer 14

You are family and one day you may need their help. Do you plan on paying others for their support down the road if you need help? Do you really need the money?

Answer 15

If your fine w/not taking the money, and if they insist just save the money for them, if they can't pay rent give that money back.  Or just save the money they are paying you and when the kids go back to school return the money to them. Tell them you watched their kids out of love, and you don't need the money and you would be offended if they don't take it.  A large sum back to them will be wonderful & maybe they can take that large sum to help pay off a bill, you'll actually help put them in a better place.  Thats what I would do - hope this helps!

Answer 16

Dont make them pay, refuse it. They need all the money they can get and as someone said above, what if you were in this situation. I think they just feel obligated to pay, dont accept it

:)

Answer 17

Tell them you will accept 50 dollars a week. They will be grateful for the drop in the amount, and happy to still be able to compensate you some for your time and efforts! You honestly deserve some money because watching 3 kids can be very difficult at times. They are lucky to have you in the family!

Answer 18

Well, if you have a 5 month old, you should ask yourself whether or not you NEED the money.  When I was a lot younger, my uncle would do work in my yard, and even though he was blood related to my mom, she still paid him because he needed money.  If however, you feel like you don't need the money, and they need it more do not accept the money

If they push you to take it, take it as to not insult them. Otherwise, if they really need it, try to deny it.

Answer 19

4 days a week. Yeah they need to compensate you, but if you dont need the money do like an earlier answer. Save it up and give it to them for a Bday.

Answer 20

thats nice of youu. just refuse the money and tell them that you just can't accept it.

Answer 21

My wife and I have 3 small kids of our own.

If it is only for the summer, and they are both working so hard to "catch up" and they give you their food, diapers, etc. for you to use on their children, then, do not charge them or accept payment. They need every extra penny they can get to "catch up" to quickly reunite with their small children. As much as you love your nephews and they love you, they need their parents more with them.

If they humbly asked for help and you accepted to help, then help them. I am sure you do like those extra 100 but humbly refuse it.

Answer 22

save up all the money they give you, and then give a really generous birthday gift to any of them.