I gave my child up for adoption 20 years ago in Alabama, what can I do to try and find her?

Question

When I was 17 my daughter was placed for adoption through an adoption agency, and they do not assist the birth mother with locating the child. I signed an agreement at the time of the adoption that said that I would not attempt to contact the child until she was over the age of 19. She turned 20 this week. Other than hiring an expensive company, how do I find her?

Answer 1

We found out what happened to a family member who was adopted out back in the 1940's by putting a few posts on Rootsweb.com. He had passed away some time ago, but his daughter has contacted us since. Our posts had been up for less than a year. You can also search the site to see if your daughter has made a post searching for you.

Good Luck.

Answer 2

sign up with isrr.net and as many registry's online that you can find.

registry.adoption.com

gsadoptionregistry.com

and any state specific or state run registry.

Have a letter placed in the adoption files (agency & state) that states you wish to make contact should she request information from them.  This will expedite the process as well.  

Many states have confidential intermediary services that will make contact on your behalf as well.

Good luck!

Answer 3

There are several options available to you. These are listed below:

a)  Approach the very Company which you were dealing at the time since the prohibition expired at age 19. Thereafter your daughter (20) is regarded as an adult and can run her own affairs. So knowing who her real martenal parent was should not be an issue.

b)  Using the websites such as yahoo.com, google, msnet

     etc. Where you write that you are searching for so and so.

c)  Using the television at aim at the peak prime time when most people are at home and put in the advertisement.

d) Using the various radio stations which are available at nominal prices or just for free.

e)  Using the national newspapers which come out on scheduled dates.

f) Using the Gorvernment daily newspaper if it exists and that could be run several times.

g)  Find out if there are free advertising pamphlets which you may put an advert.

h) Using placards and banners, although this may tend to be expensive.

Answer 4

search her on the web, post your info.....

Answer 5

if you know what her name is, you can go to your social services office and attempt to find her, assuming she wants to be in contact with you. do not just assume this, as i was adopted and i never want to be in contact with her again.

Answer 6

Hi Wendy,

You are in luck because Alabama is one of the few states that have equal laws for adoptees.  That means your daughter is able to access her original birth certificate from the state when she turns 18.  This assumes she knows she is adopted.

Are you positive you actually signed something that also forfeited your rights to contact your child and not simply the standard relinquishment form?  Adoption relinquishment just means you agree not to PARENT your child.  It is not an order of protection for the adoptive family against the natural family, despite what some may wish it to mean.  In any case, your daughter is over 18 now, so it wouldn't apply anymore.

I would recomment signing up with International Soundex Reunion Registry.  It's free http://www.isrr.net  There are also some good first mother's support groups out there.  Good luck,

julie j

reunited adoptee

Answer 7

If you know her name, a good place to look would be myspace and facebook online, you can search by using her name... Most girls around that age have one or the other.. if not both.. I've heard some success stories about other people finding loved ones that way!! Good luck in your search, I hope you find her!

Answer 8

Well the biggest roadblock to family members finding each other is out of the way in Alabama - as someone previously said, Alabama is one of the few states where an adult adoptee has access to their own birth records; so if she is looking for you she will be able to.

Put yourself out there to be found and register here:

http://www.isrr.net/

and here:

http://registry.adoption.com/

Best wishes to you and your daughter.  I would have been so thrilled if my mother came looking for me

Answer 9

well, you need her name in order to start the process.  there is a ton of info on how to find people on the web and there are books at library.  if you know her name then you can start with a basic google search and since she is 20 then she may be on facebook or myspace.  good luck to you.  YOU WILL FIND HER!  she may find you first so make sure you are easily google-able.  make a myspace page for yourself.  

it was a great thing you did to adopt her out instead of aborting.