I hate being adopted!!!?

Question

I am adopted and I hate my family both all of them including all of the foster parents. Infact I was adopted twice. The first one dont remeber much cus I was goven up by mom at 2 weeks. She did crack while she was pregnant with me and drank. She gave me up for adoption after the 2 weeks cus I was messed up with colic and ofcourse I was to much. When I was adopted by her friends things were ok though she moved away nad stopped all contact with me. My second mom and dad are now in jail for stuff that happened to me from 3-12,13. I now am 15 and have been adopted well just the papers are final now but they were my foster parents before aswell. Does anyone know if you run away from an adoptive parents house can you get arrest and if you keep running away eventually will cops leave u alone

Answer 1

Well it beats the alternative (being aborted).

And yes, if you run away long enough, the cops will leave u alone... when you turn 18.  Until then, you are a minor and must have a guardian.

Answer 2

look i have been  where your at now ...running is NOT the answer.and running is dangerous this day in time.... you could sit down and talk to your adopted parents..you are at an age where no matter who your with, you are not goin to like them..just know that they are doing whats best for you unless they are physically or mentally abusing u..about the time you hit the age of 17 and 18 you will see things differently..it is life my dear and we all have to go through it... BUT it does get better!!!just keep in  mind in THREE years you can move out on your own and do things your way.. til then get out get a job, save money ,and stay out of trouble..

good luck..

Answer 3

No, the cops will not leave you alone until your 18th birthday.  Sorry, they are just doing their jobs.  Although your home is not a happy one, the street is no place for a 15 year old either.  

You mentioned that you had bad experiences with your mother and her friends who adopted you (which is understandable, if they are friends with her they might be into the same bad things she was into).  You did not mention anything bad that your current adoptive parents have done at all.  Is it possible that they are very good parents and you might be angry because of the bad things in your life?  Is it possible that the constant transitions and this new change in your life are making you upset but they've not done anything wrong themselves?  Give them time.  This is scary for them too especially if you keep running away they must be worried all the time.

If there is a problem with neglect or abuse, please call the Deparment of Child Welfare in your state (google it to find it, I don't know what state you're in to help you).  Contact your case worker and let him/her know what is going on.  If they ever hurt you and you need immediate help, call 911.

Answer 4

dont do that...just tell people how  you feel...and hopefully they get through all that stuff.

Answer 5

At your age the police would not leave you alone.  If you keep running away someone will file a "child in need of services" petition on you, which would get you brought into court, and ordered by a judge to do one thing or another.  If your family and you have too many problems, or if they're not doing what is right, you may end up in a foster home (or a group home, which is where many kids your age stay).

If they're decent, kind, people why not ask them if they'll go with you for some family counseling?  They must care about you, or they would not have adopted you.

It is rotten that you biological mother let drugs take over her life, and it is horrible if you ended up with people who did something wrong once you were adopted.  Still, you need to believe that not everyone in the world is like that; and also, you must have some things to sort out about it all before you grow any older.

In only 3 years you'll be 18, and that isn't all that long.  In the meantime, if at all possible, why not try to work things out with your family (unless they're abusive, in which case call your social services department and report them).

You'll no longer be a minor in a short time, so why not try to work out any issues now, while you're still young, so you can build a good future emotionally.

Finally, keep in mind that you are at one of the worst ages anyone can be.  It's a hard age.  Life is difficult.  Nothing is right.  Nothing comes fast enough.   Boys sometimes have a harder time than girls.  Kids with difficult backgrounds can really have a super-rough time at your age.

Don't let whatever happened to you in the past take more away from you than it already has.

Answer 6

im adopted too

if you have a social worker, you need to talk to them bcuz i was in foster care b4 also and if there were any probs. in the family, you needed to tell them.(the social worker)

Answer 7

running away wont solve anything if u were adopted then that means this family cares about u. If u feel overwhlemed then talk to someone who can help you like a teacher at school, counselor or some one u trust but dont run away u need to show everyone that u r better then them that yes u can make it on your own but with an education and then a good job to succeed without that u can not move on in this world

Answer 8

You should talk to a social worker. Please don't run away. Alot of scary things out there ]:

Answer 9

I am so sorry for your experiences.  What a tragedy for your life to have been affected by so many people who should never have had children to begin with.  Your anger and rage is completely understandable.  Are you seeing a therapist?  Everyone can benefit from a good therapist.  But especially someone who has been abused and mistreated as you have.  A good therapist.  One you can talk to about all of the horrible things you have had to endure.  One who will let you express your rage and anger and tell you that you have EVERY right to hate those people who abused you.  

I hope you choose to stay and not run away.  If you are being abused--tell the social worker.  If you can live there safely, then stay there and get therapy for your pain.  You still have a future ahead of you if you can find healing for your pain.  If you run away, I can only imagine a lot of horrible things in your future.  

I know you hate being adopted.  I think almost every adoptee hates being adopted.  It just stinks.  Even when you have good adoptive families, it still stinks to be adopted!  Speaking of that, there is a great place for you to express your honest feeling with other adoptees who understand.  www.adultadoptees.org   Check it out and let them help you with your pain.  They understand like nobody else on earth can.

Answer 10

Obviously your new adoptive parents must care about you... you should try talking to them, and though it may be hard and awkward, I'm sure they'd understand. You need to work out your problems, not run away from them. Running away won't do you, or your new family any good, it'll make things worse on all ends. Please do yourself a favor, and just try talking first.

Answer 11

srry i feel really bad 4 u...i wont say tht i noe how it feels becoz i dont but i will say tht u should tlk 2 sum1 u can trust..cousellor///social worker

Answer 12

If you can stand up on your feet do it run away live your life alone... if not be thankful that there is someone who would like to took care of you... Be a better person ask them achieve your dream if you have dream... help your self be patience, believe in GOD look for him ask help... Pray sincerely... tel him all the pain and suffering that you have, ask him to help you to achieve your dream... to have a better life... to have you own life... to stand on your feet... and please don't hate anyone because the more you hate other people the more GOD hate you and he will abandon you... leaving you to suffering...

Luke 11:9 And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you...

Answer 13

I'm sorry. Just keep yourself safe and have as little contact with them as possible. Focus on your school. You only have 3 years until you are 18 and legally able to move out on your own. When you are 16 you can get a job and start saving money. Less time at the house too.

Hang in there. Everyone has something sad in their background. Don't let this be who you are forever. You can make it through to the other side if you believe.

Answer 14

not arrested but you might be put back in foster care,  Do you want that.  

I know it sucks, are your new adoptive parents bad.?  Or can you try and hang in there until you are 18 and can move out on your own.??  

Maybe you should talk to someone about all this,.

Answer 15

I'm adopted and I hate it too.  I know the feelings you have, I have them too.

But there's really no where to run to.  If you run away, the police may not come after you too diligently given your age, it's sad but true.  They just have too many other more pressing cases to worry about than to go after teenage runaways. And they won't arrest you, they'll just return you to your parents.

So if you run away you will be away from your parents, but then where are you?  On the street, kids your age usually end up being taking advantage of and becoming prostitutes (male or female).  You think now you'd never do that, but it happens all the time.  You will have no bed, no food, no one who cares.  On the street, anyone who acts like they care, probably just wants to pimp you.

It would be so much better for you to stay at home.  You can finish high school and go to college.  Take advantage of that at least, even if you hate your parents.  Then you can get away and have your own life.  If you need someone to talk to, maybe ask if you can see a therapist.  With everything you've been through in your life, I'm sure they will understand.