I hate my adopted family?

Question

i was adopted 4 years ago when i was 9 i am now 13 n i hate my family they make me do everything i have 2 brothers and 2 sisters that were here when i was adopted they r older then me n i can never hang out wit any of my friend wat should i do please help

Answer 1

Hey there.

I'm an adopted child myself, I was adopted by my family when I was five years old. Try speaking with your adoptive family about it, and when you say make you do everything, what exactly is it that they are making you do? Do your brothers and sisters have to do the same or similar chores, if they are chores? And with the friends things, when I was 13, I didn't get to hang around with my friends much either. Out of curiousity, if you don't mind answering, how much older than you are your siblings? If you want to talk to me, continue to talk if you have further questions you can. I'm 17 and I didn't really have many people available to speak to about adoption when I was younger, so if you want you can. Email me at this email, or at [e-mail].

My advice, stay calm and collected and explain what you mean, explain how you feel. They don't know how you feel, this may be their first adoption. Try talking to a sibling you get along well with.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Answer 2

sometimes adoption goes wrong ecause in the end your not there blood and flesh, you are thirteen is there ahuman services around you you can look them up and call them or go there and speak witht hem about this or even a school counsellor,you could always try to find your real parents

Answer 3

Talk to a counselor at school and let the counselor know what is going on at home. The school has a responsibility to follow up and make sure everything is okay at home. The counselor can also help you sort out your problems and issues and lend a caring ear. Just be persistent in speaking to an adult at school and get your concerns heard.

Good Luck.

Answer 4

Call Child Services.

Answer 5

You are 13 years old

Its called Puberty

It would happen whether you were adopted or biological

Please talk to your parents :)

Answer 6

well....it is kind of normal to hate your family when you are 13 years old.... so you have normal feelings along with a big bag of extra reasons to fuel the fire of how you are feeling....

you might be right and you might just be the slave child they always wanted to take care of all of them....if that is true stay strong because when you are older you might be able to write a book and make a fortune selling the story of your life... There hasn't been a good adopted child slave story in a really long time....

you might be right and they might not be noticing how you feel...and you might be smiling when you hurt inside--or acting like a little brat when you feel anxious....or feeling a way you have hidden from the only people you have right this moment who WANT to help you....  

no parent has a magical power of being able to read a kids mind... So most parents don't notice unless you talk to them and get real....some parents sit and try to guess--and if the kid is playing the game of smiling when they are angry How the Heck could anyone actually understand the feelings....

When you get real and be honest and tell them how you feel and  let them know the smile is a mask you learned to put on or that you feel bad because when you are scared you act like a snotty brat or Whatever the actual issues you have and know I am talking about---then your family has a chance to do better too....

Do you plan to get married and have children?

Are you going to feel like another persons slave just because you don't share the same genetics--or do you think it will be nice to have a spouse that isn't a blood relative?

Just because people don't share DNA doesn't mean they cannot live as a happy family ...

Answer 7

Sounds like adoption is not the issue.  It won't carry you very far in life to blame all your troubles on adoption!  Instead, look to what your parents want you to do.  Ask about that.  See if people think it is unreasonable.  Perhaps it is, perhaps it is not.  That is really the issue.  MOST 13 year olds find their parents the most unlikable or boring people on earth.  You are not alone!  Talk to other kids on another section about parents.  You will find you are not alone!

Answer 8

Talk to your parents, please.  If you can't talk to them, maybe your school couselor can help you sort things out and find a way to help you discuss this issue with your parents.

Answer 9

You should try talking to the parents

Answer 10

You're thirteen years old and sometimes thirteen year olds have conflict with their parents, whether biological or adopted.  If you are not being allowed to hang around with your friends, is there a reason for it?  Have you been following the rules in your house, doing what you are supposed to be doing in school?  Even biological parents set limits on their kids!  It's normal, especially when you are angry with your family, to wonder what life would have been like with your birthfamily.  Guess what, non-adopted kids, when angry with their parents, also wonder what life would have been like if they were adopted!

So, take a breath, cool off. Then go have a reasonable conversation with your family.

Answer 11

Your 13 years old, you would have issues and hate your parents even if you weren’t adopted. Your siblings are older and that just means they are going to have more privileges then you and be able to do more things. Do your parents feel your friends are a poor influence on you?  You should sit down and have a  conversation with your parents.

Answer 12

Have you told your adoptive parents how you feel.Maybe you should try to analyze why you are feeling this way.Is it because you really hate them or are you just resentful because you are adopted and it would not matter who you were with as far as family goes.I do think that you really need to talk to someone who has an understanding of what you are going through and who might be able to help you sort through what you are feeling