I hate my mom, is this not fair or am I crazy?

Question

Last week Monday I asked my mother if I could go out with my friend Saturday night to this barbeque. She said yes & so on Saturday when I was getting ready around 5 o'clock to leave at 7:30 she decides to go out, she said she would be back by 7 & she was going to her boyfriends office. Hours pass by, she doesn't come back. I couldn't leave because I was home with my two little sisters. She doesn't come back until the next morning & then she leaves within minutes & comes back that night, Sunday. (by the way, my friend wasn't able to go either because we were supposed to go together) so anyway, I ask her if I could go out tonight considering the fact that I haven't seen the light of day in two days. She starts yelling "who do I think I am, she doesn't owe me anything I don't deserve it and no I couldn't go out because when she returned (for those few minutes Sunday morning) dishes were in the sink and I had an attitude"

I'M SORRY IF I WASN'T BURSTING W/FLIPPING JOY FROM BEING STUCK IN THE HOUSE FOR 2 DAYS & MISSING A PARTY BUT IS IT RIGHT FOR HER TO NOT ALLOW ME TO GO OUT?

I babysit my sisters every day of the freaking week, mon-fri from 8-7 and weekends random hours like 12-5 or 3-8 while she is at work, is it f*cking wrong for me to want to go out for the few hours I have when she gets off of work?? how do I make this woman realize that SHE is in the wrong and not me? I am 16 years old & my life consists of being in the house w/a crazy woman or my sisters. someone help me I can't even sleep at night because I'm so stressed & all she does is yell at me :'(

and goddammit I miss my f*cking boyfriend who I haven't seen in weeks thanks to her having me on freaking house arrest

I've basically turned to drinking which I do only when I'm EXTREMELY pissed at her, it makes me forget. but before she started acting like this I never picked up a drink in my life, no drugs no bad grades NOTHING it isn't as if I'm a bad kid..

Answer 1

She is your mother.

So she does have a right.

And maybe she forgot or something.

Next time dont tell her ahead of time.

When your ready to walk out the door then tell her.

It worked for me.

=]

Answer 2

i have sympathy for you.

i dont think you're overreacting, your mom seems like a *****.

and im sorry, it seems like your life sucks.

you should have a major talk with your mom for being so irresponsible.

Answer 3

Well i think your mum is having trouble. She's stressed and blames it on you and she might not mean it. If you ever see her on the couch stressed or crying(which might happen) ask if shes ok and try and comfort her and if she starts shouting at you dont shout back just tell her that you hope everything works out and that you love her and walk away. It will show you care. and if she isnt stressed then you have the right to be so danmed mad!! go to her and tell her you want to go outside tell her you demand a break(but make sure shes not stressed or upset first) and if she starts yelling then shout back whatever and storm into your room. After that if she goes out again and you wat to go out take your sisters out with you. It might not be the best idea but at least its something. Meet up with your boyfriend in a park or playground or on a field maybe he can play with your sisters =] leave a note and bring your phone just incase and if she asks where you were say you went for a walk with them. kk? good luck! =]

Answer 4

um she's responsible for your little sisters if your home or not..she leaves like that again tell her your going to call children services, but first demand she arrives home on the agreed time.

Also alcohol will leave you depressed and Shi7. Demand respect from her. Tell her if it wasnt for you she'd pay through the nose for a sitter!

Tell her that if she punishes you for her not wanting to be a sitter that youll leave and since your a minor she will get in serious trouble while you get a smack on the wrist and tell her she is causing you to drink. WTF in 2 yrs youll be an alcholic at this rate. Tell her that also.Tell her family is more important than some man.  

Answer 5

Sweetheart - first off.........drinking is not going to help anything but giving you more problems than you need.  Second - I would write her a letter.  It sounds really stupid, but when you write a letter it's easier to get the point and feeling across the way that you want without getting emotional or making her angry with a confrontation.  Don't give it an accusing tone like, I'm sick of you doing this.........but focus on how the things she's doing is making you feel.  I grew up in a situation similar to yours.........unfortunately sometimes there's nothing you can do.  Write a letter and if that doesn't work.......try to talk to her in a calm and heartfelt manner.  If that doesn't work........wait until your 18 and make your life what you want it to be!!  There is NOTHING wrong with you wanting what a 16 year old girl normally wants to do.  You have your WHOLE life to be a responsible adult with obligations and responsibilies.........to force that on you is to take away your childhood.  Which she'll regret later.  Try to be open, honest, and tell her how you feel.  There's a fine line between being a single parent and asking your oldest child to help you to get by.........it's quite another to ask them to share your responsibilities.

Answer 6

i think that you need to just lean back for a second. collect yourself, take a deep breath, and listen to me open-mindedly.

first, try not to turn to drinking when you are angry.

second, your mom could have a good explanation.

third, you have a good reason to be upset. you were treated unfairly, and your mom hasn't answered any of your questions, really.

(i'm 14, so don't be thinking that i haven't gone through similar things)

i also understand that i have never gone exactly through what you are going through now.

i think you should take out a piece of paper, and write down everything that happened. write out bad words, how you feel about your mom, everything. just let it out. scream into a pillow. (do all of this, it really really helps. what do you have to lose?)

then, just throw the paper away.

now that your anger is mostly gone, you should talk to your mom calmly and rationally, in a situation where both of you are not busy. be sure to ask 'hey, can we talk'

dont lose your temper, listen to her side of the story, and try to work it out. try and be the bigger person. if you can forgive her, and she cannot (even though, your right, you havent done anything wrong) then just know that you were stronger than she was.

Answer 7

Wow i am like very shocked. no mother should be treating her kid like this. your right being mad.

I feel so bad for you that i just dont know how to answer your question

Answer 8

ring up a social worker and tell them what you have just told in yor message. its not right your still young you have a right to your own life your sisters are her responsibility not yours. please seek help ring social workers or your doctor or anyone if it continues you could ask to be placed in foster care if your are becoming mentally stressed and abused. my heart goes out to you. but dont be afraid of telling someone who can take charge of the situation your a star your mother is taking you for granted. good luck pet best wishes. please take my advice

Answer 9

She obviously doesnt care for you and doesnt respect what you say. If your over 18(just guessing because you say you drink) move out. Or save up then move out.