I have a 11 year old son and has just started football, he hates it. How can I motivate him not to drop out?

Question

My is son 11 and hates going to football practice. I have to fight with him every night. The only reason i am pushing it is because he is over weight and will not move to do anything. I see him struggle and it just kills me but I know this is something he should finish. As the days pass I find myself wanting to give in and drop him form the team. I don’t think he is in a harmful situation but I know it takes allot out of him. Should I continue to push him or should i just pull him from the team?

Answer 1

You do not have to fight with him every night.  You can refuse to engage in a fight, regardless of what the other person does.  Every time you fight with him & he acts like he's miserable he's chipping away at your resolve to help him.

Why does he hate football?  If its just that he hates this particular sport, there are many ways to get exercise.  Maybe there is something you can do together?  If he just hates exercise of any kind, then he should probably stick it out.  As his skills improve, his attitude should do so as well.  You should know, though, that the main component of weight loss is eating properly.  If he's getting lots of exercise but still eating tons of fried/fast/junk food, he'll stay fat.   You are correct about playing football not being a harmful situation.  And your instincts are also correct - being fat is a very harmful situation!

Answer 2

Look, I'm thirteen I know what it feels like to be a kid!

You can't force a kid to do something he doesn't want to do!

Try different sports!

Or at least explain to you kid why you want him to continue foot ball!

Answer 3

Let him go in the direction that interests him.  Don't eat within 4 hours of bedtime.

Answer 4

It's important that you let him do what he wants, but I do understand why you're doing this. It's important that you're son stays healthy. You should start little by little, like start eating healthy meals everyday, then it'll become a habit, and then he'll grow up with that. You can also try doing activities, get physical. Do things with your son, be active. Go swimming, bike riding, or walking in the park daily. If he sees that you're doing it along with him, then he'll sort of be motivated. In my school, in P.E, we lift weights, run the track, and we do different types of game units. My mom signed me up in 24 Hour Fitness and swimming lessons at YMCA, and all I do now is stay active. I don't watch T.V all day long or sit at the computer for more than 5 hours, like I used to. good luck.

The YMCA is a great place for having fun and working out, it's also a place for kids too. they have two huge pools, one inside and one outside. and they have exercising machines.

It's a bit expensive to be a member, but you can always exercise at home also.

Answer 5

football isnt the only option but if he only hates it because its exersize then he will hate everything else too lol.. I say you bribe him tell him if he sticks it out till the end of the season you will get him something that you know he will love or want and will motivate him. He will probably go along with it and maybe by the end of the season will actually like practice. Encourage him the best you can. If he just dosent like football then tell him you will take him out if he joins soccer or something...otherwise watch what he eats and exersize with him

Answer 6

Well, you want to help him with his weight problem...have you considered alternatives? Being on a football team isn't the ONLY option...there are tons of other reasonable ways to help him, find the best one that interests him, and keep going with it.

Good luck.

Answer 7

i would continue to push him but i would definitly think it would back fire on you...see if there isn't something deeper going on. football can be an opportunity for other kids to take advantage of tackling and knocking ya around. i am sure he isn't telling you the whole story....just make him hang in there for a while longer and if it is absolute horrible for him then i would let him quit...but not until he explored every option. oh yea talk to the coach not in front of others and if the coach has good things to say then let your son know.

Answer 8

Football might not be the best choice for him physically. It's a high impact sport and for someone overweight, that means more pressure on joints already taxed as is and there's alot of running and drills and being overweight he's more prone to heat exhaustion as well. You should talk with him and see what he'd like to do. I personally would reccomend swimming because it's great cardio and alot easier on the joints. Another good choice is simply biking. Then there's things like dance or tae chi which although he may be resistant to, he may actually enjoy! Just put the emphasis on him doing what he likes and take focus off of him being overweight. It's hard enough being overweight without feeling your parents are against you.

Answer 9

Forceing a child to lose wieght will not encourage a healthy lifestyle. Alot of overweight kids don't like team sports she if he likes more unusaual sports like hiking, horseback riding, or ice skating.

Answer 10

I would find out why he does not like it first of all. Is the exercise to intense for him? Are other kids picking on him? etc.  Maybe you can find a way to deal with it if you know the root of the problem.

I have a rule with my kids that if they choose to participate in an activity and sign up, they must complete the season. It is all about integrity and keeping commitments- invaluable traits. Then, after the season, they have the choice to sign up again or not.

If he chooses not to do football, find other healthy activities that he will enjoy. Maybe he'd like to do martial arts? Walk the dog every day? Frisbee golf? Biking? Anything that motivates him and gets him out of doors.

Answer 11

If he hates it, why not let him find another sport he likes? Have you spoken to his Dr. about his weight? Are you providing him with healthy food instead of junk?

Answer 12

My husband and I have told our kids. You do not have to play next season/year. But you are not quitting. My husband is adamant about not letting our kids quit things, unless of course they were being hurt etc. But if it is just because now they don't like it, too bad you are in it for the season. Go to his practices and support him if you can, that may help some. Did he want to go, or did you make him? If you made him that is a different story, we have never made our kids play any sports, it has always been their choice. If you forced him then you should let him quit, but work out with him at home as a team to help him loose weight.