I have a 14 month old son.. Now I am expecting TWIN BOYS!?

Question

Hi.

I recently found out that I am having twin boys. I am very happy but worried about my son. He won't even be 2 when the new babies get here. I was wondering if anyone else had the same experience.

I know lots of women that had babies close together. But having a young one and then TWO more? I am afraid of what I'll do when if I end up on bed rest? What can I do for my son. Anything special to do before the babies get here to make him feel special? How can I make a good routine that fit my older son in with everything? I don't want him to feel ignored. He may though. Because my husband works and gets home at about 3:30 everyday.

So I'll have 2 newborns, a 1.5 yr old son, and I babysit a 7 year old boy.. So goodness I'm going to have to occupy 4 little boys.

So any helpful advice would be GREAT! Thanks

Answer 1

First, congratulations on your rapidly growing family!

Second, I would ask the mother of the 7 year old if other childcare arrangements can be made for him.  You will have more than enough on your hands, and there is no need for you to put additional stress on yourself.

Your first son is still quite young, but spending as much time as possible with him now, before the babies arrive, as a family will help.  Your husband can concentrate on spending one-on-one time with him when he gets home from work and until he goes to bed - some father-son bonding time.  I think keeping him involved in caring for the babies and being "mommy's helper" would be good.  He will be at the age where he wants to be a "big boy" and you can encourage him to be the best big brother ever!

The bottom line is that your plate is very full, and the load won't lighten any time soon.  Hopefully you have family and friends nearby who will be ready and willing to help you during this stressful, yet wonderful time in your life.  

Try to take care of yourself as best you can now - eat healthy, take your son for a walk every day for some exercise, take your prenatal vitamins, nap when you are tired.... whatever it takes to have you in the best condition possible as you near the delivery date.  Not all twin gestations require bedrest - though you may be ready for an order for bedrest by the time your third trimester is in full swing!  

Best of luck!

Answer 2

LOL, my children were all planned, too... except one of the twins!  It is not possible to plan twins.  I had a 7 year old boy and a 2 year old boy when my twins (boy & girl) were born.  That was 24 years ago.  

I always tell my youngest son that he was the only baby we didn't plan, and it was God who planned him.  We were trying for a girl, that third time around.  

And it was a busy time, but very special.  Your little boy is going to adjust very well, because, as my middle son always says, he won't remember a time when the twins were not around.  

One thing I did, to leave myself more time for my other boys, is that I used baby formula and breastfeeding.  I was then able to nurse one baby while holding a bottle for the other, sitting beside the infant chair. Then I switched sides and gave another bottle to the other baby.

I had a pack and play handy, with the two infant seats inside it, and when ever I had to put them down, they were placed in there for their own safety.  Otherwise, the older boys would try to help take care of them.

If you get your twins on the same schedule, that will leave you time for your older baby when they are sleeping.  Eventually, all three of them will be on the same schedule.  

Don't refuse any help from any friend or family member.  My parents were recently retired when the twins were born, and they came and stayed with us for a full month.  It was the most wonderful memory of my life.  

My husband is in the construction business, and the twins were born in the winter time when work was not so busy, so that helped a lot, too.  If your husband can take some vacation time, that would be a good idea, just until you get a routine worked out.

Answer 3

Don't worry, I reported fairy!

I did things a bit opposite from you.  :-)  I have twin girls, 14 months old, and I am pregnant now with a singleton!  Not sure what I'm having since I'm only 15 weeks along.

I'm sure you can handle it.  I've talked to many moms who had 1, then twins, and the 1 baby helped to prepare them for twins since you already know a bit of what to expect.

You may not end up on bedrest.  Twins doesn't always mean bedrest.  I worked up to 35 weeks and carried my twins to 38 weeks!  I was home 3 days later after my c-section.

One thing you can do to make your son feel special is to enlist him as your special little helper.  Have him fetch diapers, bottles if you bottle feed, let him hold a bottle for a baby if you bottle feed, etc.  My nephew was great about that when I went to visit.  He LOVED helping!  I'm going to let my twins be my little helpers this time with diapers, I'll let them help me burp the baby, feed the baby when the baby is on solids, etc.

You can make sure that when your twins nap that you do something special with your son.  Take him into another room for some reading time, coloring time, creative story making time, etc.  He won't be napping as much as your twins will be.

You can do this!

It's going to be hardest in those first few weeks since you won't be sleeping a whole lot.  If there is anyone who can help you out, see about it.  My mom was a big help to me and I didn't have another child at the time.

Good luck.  I know you can do it.  :-D

EDIT:  I also like the idea of joining a multiples club but if you're like me and you live in a rural area and there are no multiples clubs within like 75 miles :-( then look for one online.  Send me an email at [e-mail] if you want info on the one I belong to!

Answer 4

Lucky you! I`ve a new born of 7 months plus Princess. My wife was crying and quite worried. Because she is a daughter.

In the Chinese world, of course,  a son is VIP. I told my wife to relax. To me, either a son or a daughter, it` s all the same.

Oh yeah, you still have a pair of twins princes coming.

Please do not be upset or worried. They`ll bring you the greatest of good luck!

Why not try to buy a coming saturday lottery?

Answer 5

First of all, join a "Parents of Twins" club. My wife and I found the support and comaraderie indispensible!

There is a woman in out club who has twin girls and a 4 year old son. She says he is very protective about "his babies" and does a lot to help her out. She has a mother's helper (like a nanny I guess) to help out too and she keeps the older son occupied.

I suggest involving your son and giving him some "responsibility" (ie; get the milk, get a toy, etc) to make him feel like he's really helping and that you appreciate his help. I think that will make him feel more connected to them and is a way to keep him from being left out.

Seriously, join a club!

Answer 6

hey girl its me :)  - just keep zane busy with things and have him help out so he doesnt feel left out! u can do it!!!! :)

Answer 7

check out the tlc channel and watch JON AND KATE + 8! they have twins and sextuplets all within 3 years of each other. They have great tips how to organize, entertain, keep how clean....

Congrats on twins!!!

Answer 8

wow! I'll have my second about 1.5 months before my first turns 2, but at least I know I'm only having 1!

Do you have any other family support you can call on, your (or your husband's) parents, grandparents etc?

My mum had twins as her 3rd and 4th, and was ordered to bedrest for the last couple of months, so my grandmother bascially lived with us for that time to help out.

Perhaps the person you're sitting for could make alternative arrangements for at least the last couple of months of your pregnancy and the first few months after the twins are born.

I'm wondering the same thing as you though, about my son - helping to prepare him for the arrival of his little brother or sister and trying to minimise the upheaval to his life!

Congratulations (although you're probably still in shock about the twins!) and all the very best for your pregnancy and a fulfilling life with a bunch of boys. xx

Answer 9

god wont give you more than you can handle. its true weither your religious or not. i have 3 boys and a girl 9,6,5 and 3 months my husband works graveyard and sleeps all day its tough and it will b a little tough for you and someone else will have it tougher for you have you seen jon and kate plus 8, they have 2 6 year olds and 6 four year olds  thats crazy but you will be ok good days and bad days good luck