Question:

I have a 2yr old. What are you supposed to do when he cries and cries when he doesn't get what he wants?

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My son is almost 3, he'll be 3 in AUgust. It seems like his terrible two are just starting. Lately if I dont give him what he wants he'll cry and cry, and flail his arms everywhere and basically just throw tempertantrums. DO I just walk away and ignore him. Or should I sit there and wait til he is finished and then try to talk to him. But you see when he finally stops crying, I try to explain why he doesn't get it, and he still doesn't agree with me or he just doesn't say okay. He just has this pouty face on for a while. I dont know. Can someone help?

Thanks.

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  1. Sounds like he's just testing his limits.  I think you should just leave him for a few minutes until he settles down, and then do what you're doing.  Get down to his level, and in a calm and adult voice tell him why he can't have what he wants and why crying doesn't help at all.  He will eventually figure it out.

    My 2 1/2 year old does the same thing, and I just keep being consistent and I have noticed that he seems to freak out a lot less!!

    Good luck!


  2. i have the same thing. same age. he will be 3 next week.

    you have to walk away and ignore it. he is having a hard time dealing with his frustrations and trying to get what he wants.

    this is a defining time. you are the mom. you make the choices. after he calms down talk to him. validate his feelings. say i know you must be mad you didnt get that cookie. i know you really wanted it but i really want you to eat your lunch first. that would make me happy too.

    this kind of talk tells the child its okay to have these feelings and helps him understand what they are and how to deal with them.

    good luck. i always thought the 3s were worse then the 2s.

  3. Kids learn early when they can or cant work there parents. At this age he's testing you to see what he can get away with. If you dont think he should be doing something or dont want to give him his way then dont. Because once you do everytime he wants his way he will do the same because he knows what it takes for you to give him. Like if he throws a fit punish him but taking something he likes away for awhile. Once he knows his good and can get it back he will catch on. Dont worry it will all be ok. Just make sure that he knows that you set the rules not him. This is how they learn. :)

  4. Let him cry , stand your ground. mean what you say and say what you mean always.

  5. Why not try the same thing? No tantrums, he's too young to understand that; just being sad and crying, being quiet, and when he asks what's wrong Mummy, you could try to mention that you're sad that you didn't get your own way/what you want, and use that to go further with his understanding that we can't always have everything our own way. I know that I never liked seeing my Mum crying, and would do my best to cheer her up. All the best.

  6. try time out. just say do u want to go to time out.  make a time out chair with him.

  7. its hard but be Strong and don't listen to him.

  8. my daughter wines all the time(2 1/2)  a lot  of the time they are frustrated because they don't have good social skills or know how to communicate what they feel or want. i always tell my daughter use your words then i tell her what she needed to say to get things she wants or needs like "Lacie all u have to say is hey mom i would like ______ don't just cry" i have done this so much that now all i have to say is " hey mom" when she is throwing a fit and she stops and calms down and says "hey mum i lika da _____" its super cute but she stops crying and i try to reward her as quick as i can.

    when she throws a big fit after i talk to her i say  "sorry mom" and she will repeat me.so she knows the words to use later and she has started to say sorry after her fits now. just be consistent. good luck

  9. ignore the behavior.  you're the parent, act like one.

  10. My son will be 2 in August and he is fully into his "terrible two's".  At this point, I just walk away and let him work it out himself.  He's still too young to fully "get it" when I explain why he can't have things.  At three you might be able to explain a little more ("I'm sorry you can't play with that, it can give you an owie" or something like that).  I say things like that to my son now, but I don't think he understands yet.

    Good luck--tantrums have got to be the most trying thing I have ever experienced!!

  11. Ignore him. Giving him attention only encourages this behavior.

  12. You don't give in by giving in he understands even at 2 years old that if he cries he will get what he wants.

  13. The best advice is to ignore the tamtrum until it's over.  After he is done, you tell him calmly, If you want my attention, please tell me with words.  You don't punish him for it because you are giving him attention.  Although kids are very smart, a child this age doesn't understand things the way an adult does, or an older child.  He went from Mommy and Daddy doing everything for him to you wanting him to have independence...using the bathroom by himself, feeding himself, not playing as much as before, etc.  By punishing him or responding to him during the tantrum or right after is going to let him know that he gets your attention if he acts that way.  Also, you need to keep a schedule with him.   Don't take him in public when he's tired and hungry.   Good luck.

    Edit...Kids this young cannot vocalize the way we can frustrations....their way of showing it is the tantrums.

  14. its a stage, and he will get over it. try to not let it bother you. if he doesnt get his way, and cries, quickly try to distract him with something that will make him happy that is ok for him to have at the time in replacement. if that doesnt work try to ignore it. he WILL get over it.

  15. First of all stop being so affected by his pouty face. If he wont eat dont feed him.  If he wants something and you cant give it to him, then dont give it to him.. If you show a sign of weakness then your kid will know your weakness and exploit it for the rest of his life.  And trust me if you thinks its bad now wait till he becomes a teen, you have to show him whose boss now, becuase later will be too late.

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