I have a soon to be 5 year old son who just started preschool........?

Question

so far he has been "bad" throwing toys at kids and knocking some kids down. he isn't fimiliar with school,either though.

is he not ready for school yet,or could there be a deeper problem here? all the rest of the children act fine,and they are a bit younger! i don't know what to do ?.......any advice..should he continue the school,or not??

Answer 1

Is he going half days or full days, if he is going full days maybe you should talk to his teacher and see when he does better (morning or afternoon) and then change him to where he goes to school durning that time and then gradually work him up until he is going all day.  The last thing I would do is pull him out of school, kids are very smart and he will learn that if he acts up or hits then he won't have to go to school and when he goes into kindergarten that will be a huge problem.

Answer 2

Keep him in! He needs help in understanding how to act around other kids. This will help him to get ready  for school.

Talk to him. Dont just tell him what he is doing wrong, ask him why he is doing it and let him know punshments will be given for acting "bad" .

Good luck!

Answer 3

At almost 5, he is fine to be in a preschool setting. If he hasn't had any experience with school, he may not know how to behave or what is expected of him. If he hasn't been around a lot of other children (especially in larger groups in a more structured environment), he hasn't had the opportunity to learn proper social skills for these types of situations.

Preschool can be a great place to learn social skills. The first thing you need to do is have a parent-teacher conference with his teacher. Work together on setting up a behavior plan. Your job will be to honestly tell her all about your son, what kinds of things he responds to well at home, and what things make him fight back. There may be a lot of trial and error at first, as you find out what works in a classroom setting and what doesn't. Just make sure that you're supportive of the teacher and follow through with any 'at-home' consequences that you've agreed to. (If you feel like the teacher isn't responsive to your ideas or willing to talk to you about solutions, find a different preschool; also try and observe the class one day and watch how she interacts with your child; she may not deal with your child in an effective manner).

The next thing you can do is work with your son at home. If you are told he threw a toy at school, ask him about it (try and really be interested in what he says; don't let your impatience or annoyance come through. You don't want him to shut down because he thinks he's in trouble). He may not be able to verbalize his reasoning, so help him with that. Once you determine the cause of his behavior, discuss how he will behave next time. Role play various scenarios so that he understands and practices his options.

And last, be patient! This is a new experience for him, so give him time to learn how to handle things appropriately.

~Kyanna

Answer 4

An important part of the parent's role is in training one's child to deal with other people. So far he has had only his immediate family to deal with. Suddenly he is in the rather frightening situation of having to deal with a lot of new faces, and he neeeds time to settle in. However, he needs to be encouraged to deal with his fears by being friendly rather than aggressive.  As you know, our deepest instinct is 'flight or fight'. Obviously he can't flee the school, so he is doing what all young animals do, which is to try to find his place in the pecking order by appearing dominant - and this he does by his aggressive behaviour. Do not worry, but do all you can to build up his confidence, and explain that the children he is surrounded by are potential friends. Encourage him to be nice to others, especially when you are with him, in the playground, maybe at the end of the day, and he will get used to being part of a group. Good luck, and don't panic.

Answer 5

It's hard to think of your child as the misbehaving one!  I have an almost 5 yr old son as well.  he started preschool for a little while last yr and every day I got sad faces b/c of his behavior.   I think it just takes children longer to catch on to the routine.  And a great teacher!  I think my son and his first teacher were having some issues so when they switched teachers his behavior completely changed.  I was getting alot more smiley faces,  Maybe he's just acting out b/c it's all new to him but I'm sure he'll settle down and really enjoy going to see his friends in a little while.  What I did with my son was rewarded him for his "good days"  positive reinforcement for him is key!  maybe watching his favorite show on tv when he got home of a special board game with mommy after school or time with just him and you.  I think he'll benefit from the school before he really starts kindergarden,  but if the situation doesn't get any better in the next couple of months you may want to think about a different class or location to enroll him.  But this is all just my opinion.  Hope it helps.  Melissa, Mommy to Alex 4 1/2 and Abby 1 1/2

Answer 6

sit him down and explain he has a choice as to how he acts. Let him know that you will not allow him to behave poorly. Please do not say bad.  Set up a punishment plan and FOLLOW THROUGH.

Answer 7

Has he spent much time around other children before? If not he may not know what his behavior should be. If he has this could be something that happened to him. I have a feeling he wants to go home and spend his days with mommy....He may just need for you to sit down and explain to him that this is important to him for his education and he needs to get used to going to school because this is just the beginning.......reassure him that you will always be there for him and maybe even volunteer a couple times so that he knows you are always around for him. He needs to know that being mean to the other children is not nice at all.....