I have an 8 month baby girl which I have not seen for a few months how can I make her not be scared of me?

Question

I am just returning from work and I am afraid of my little baby girl being scared of me. Her mother shows pictures of me but I feel she won't remember me.. any help in making her feel comfortable?

Answer 1

Keep your emotions in check. If she does shy off don't let it upset you, babies pick up on our emotions so easily. It sounds like the mother has done everything she can to keep memories of you alive so there may be no problem at all but don't let yourself feel hurt if it takes awhile to reconnect.

Even if you're not a big man keep in mind the difference in size between 8 month old and adult. Get down on her level without getting right in her face. Even if there hadn't been a period of absence it's important to always see things from their perspective. Some babies learn to recognize people from the shoes they wear because that's what they see first. I'm sure that your daughter will be in her mother's arms at first but once things relax and the baby is on the floor playing or wherever, approach while crawling or crouching so that you aren't looming over her, you want her to learn to recognize your face and voice again.

Don't be too aggressive.Don't take her in your arms immediately unless she makes a move toward you.  I like the idea of taking a gift, some kind of interactive toy that she can sit down and play with and you can join in.

Babies tend to bond with their food source, it's a built in survival mechanism so get involved with her feeding during your first week at home. She may not let you feed her your first day but work yourself into the feeding routine when you can.

Mainly....be ready for anything and let the baby set the tone.

You know, the fact that you're thinking about these things indicates what kind of daddy you are. Just be patient and I'm sure within a few days it will be as if you were never absent.

Best wishes

Answer 2

Babies this age tend to "make strange" to those they don't see everyday.  Don't let this upset you.  Once you are with her, she should be just fine.  Just play with her, and try to feed her once she is used to you being there. Good Luck!

Answer 3

I know you'll want to get right into her face and snuggle her, who wouldn't, but you'll probably have to take it easy at first.  Talk softly and happily.  Have Mommy hold her while you visit at first.  After she's gotten used to you a bit, then hold her while sitting next to Mommy.  It will take time, so don't feel bad if she isn't smiles and giggles right away.  She'll know you very soon and will be Daddy's girl again.  A little stuffed toy would also be good... never to young to bribe them a bit.  Good luck!!

Answer 4

Try to be relaxed and comfortable....they can sense anxiety.  Let her come to you...and don't be upset if she doesn't want to right away...it's not something you can force.  She'll warm up to you!!  Good luck!

Answer 5

bring her toys. buy her icecream. and smell nice,  so she associates you with nice things.

also don't forget to shave closely, men's cheeks are very unpleasant...

make sure you don't raise your voice around her, especially with her mom. I don't necessarily mean by being angry, but laughing very loud is a bit scary for babies too.

don't "take her mom away from her" too obviously. wait until you are behind closed doors to hug.

but most of all be patient. of course she won't remember you, you have to make your best first impression during this visit, so she remembers you next time.

Answer 6

If her mom conveys the excitement to her then she will be excited too. And even if she is scared, play with her for a while and she will be fine.

Answer 7

a baby that age will react negatively to anyone who isn't mom even if they see the person regularly.  expect the baby to need some time to warm up to you.  don't get discouraged.  this type of anxiety is very normal for an 8 month old.  she might fuss when you hold her the first few times, but she will get used to you soon enough and the anxiety will be forgotten.

btw, do NOT give an 8 month old ice cream.

Answer 8

Bring her a new toy home and let her get used to you a little at a time, play with her and sing songs with her, she should like that :)

Answer 9

Nap time does wonders. MY husband thought that our daughter(6weeks) hated him b/c she would cry every time he held her. He started holding her when she was really sleepy and she would pass out on his chest. It helped her know his smell and listen to his heart beat. Now she just smiles at daddy and all is good.

Answer 10

If her mummy shows pics, then all should be ok. How exciting for you all though!! It would be hard being away from loved ones that long