I have an addictive personality?

Question

i take everything to excess i have spent my adult life taking things to th eecess, i have smoked drunk took drugs and eat to excess... if i dont do one thing its another or just a good combination of all of them...but... i have responsibilities i should be passed this phase and be a responsible adult and parent im getting to old (in my 30s) and need to sort it out and stop it but i cant let go of this way of life

Answer 1

It's really difficult to quit an addiction, but it is possible and people do it every day.

The main things are that you really have to want to quit, and you have to believe you can.  

It helps a lot if there are people in your life who can be supportive and can encourage you when you're tempted to give in and eat/smoke/drink/whatever.

It also helps if you find ways to reward yourself.  For example, if you quit smoking, save the money you would have spent on cigarettes, and every week buy yourself a treat with the money - some CDs, or books or whatever interests you.

Also, a healthy diet and daily exercise make quitting an addiction *much* easier.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Seek counselling. Addiction is much deeper and probably needs expert attention

Answer 3

I know EXACTLEY what you mean im ****** !

am seeking mental health but dont see a way forward at moment if it not drink drugs or shopping then its s*x with strangers.

Am on prozac trying to get lithium at moment but b******s wont give it to me....

Go to the quack mate or email me

Good luck    ;-)

Answer 4

just DRAW THE LINE

Answer 5

go to your GP/doctor and ask for help there, they will know what to do

Answer 6

You certainly have which really only leaves you with 3 choices 1] Stay that way and whinge about how it's not your fault you were made that way. 2] Get a grip and take control and responsibility of your own destiny 3] Do positive things and be addicted eg  sports, charity work or just plain old fashioned work.

Answer 7

Looks like you may need to look at why you are developing these addictions, once you have sorted that then you are on the way to solving your addiction problem.

Answer 8

Some psychologist or psychiatrist (pseudo-sciences) made up the term. You really lack self control.

A very bright lady once told me, "You are where you are doing what you want to do. No matter how much you complain or whine about it. If you want to change things enough, you'll find a way to change them." She was absolutely right -- at least as far as I was concerned. Sometimes it might take a little courage to leave our comfort zone. But it can be done.

Answer 9

Find a good therapist that can help. Therapists usually deal with people who have "adjustment to life" issues and don't really work with people that are mentally ill. They should be able to see how you think, what triggers you have, and recommend some changes you can integrate slowly into your life.

Another thing I would recommend is to find some things that you like that are good for you and keep yourself busy. Having a lot of time or being bored makes it easier to indulge. Get involved in things where you have to be somewhere, or you have to produce something, so that you are occupied and can't easily get out of it if you just don't feel like it. You can even make a mental game of it where you make goals that if you do xyz that is productive and healthy, then you will allow yourself to have a "treat". In the end though, we all fight with urges to do what we want vs. what we have to.

If you're not addicted physically, then it will come down to how badly you want it, what actual (practical) steps you are willing to take to make it happen (not buy something anymore vs. bringing it in the house), steps you are willing to take to find other more productive and healthy things to occupy your time. etc. But be realistic... do you really want to change? If so, you will more likely commit to doing better things and you will get more of a satisfaction out of them. There are many people who say they would like to be different but inside, they know they are really not willing to do anything to disrupt the status quo. You first need to decide if you are serious about it and then start making actual goals.

One thing that will not work is if you do something half-assed by saying "oh I want to do this and that" but you make no plans, no phone calls, contact no people, or you just do a little bit of it, and then when you fail, you will think you're not good at it and lose confidence. Don't attempt it unless you want to actually do the work because then it will drain your belief in yourself. I've done the same with diets where I tried them half-assed and then wanted to think "diets don't work for me" but the truth was that I wasn't sticking to it like I should and it wasn't the diet but my engagement in it. Be honest with yourself and with your efforts.

Also, people in your life are paramount!! Who you surround yourself with is important. Find friends that don't do the c**p you don't want to do and hang out with them. In other words, if you don't want to drink, don't go to the bar. Maybe you liked scrabble as a kid... find a scrabble club. Too boring? Something else good you enjoy. Surround yourself with the kind of people and activities that are positive and then the more you live it the more it will become second nature and you will not miss it as much. Unfortunately there isn't one easy way to do it - it takes preparing yourself mentally for the fact that it will be hard, that you will have to do it when you don't feel like it, and that it's up to you and nobody else (you can't blame others). Taking responsibility is very important in order to conquer something.

Being from another country where strict discipline was practiced in school and at home, I am very taken aback with the permissive American attitude in schools and in parenting. There is little power coming from adults to try to shape kids to have self discipline and self regulating abilities. Excess is everywhere (look at the ice cream cones!) and marketing targets kids specifically and parents rarely set strict boundries... I see many kids today growing up without a lot of self discipline, goal setting, time manatement skills, etc. Sometimes they seem unprepared for the temptations of the world (first credit cards marketed to college kids) and the ability to delay gratification. Not saying anything has happened to you, just saying it's not necessarily an addictive personality - I see many people with problems like this where proper structure and discipline wasn't taught early on and then people struggle. Good luck and if you have kids don't hesitate to be FIRM with them. You have the power and it's up to you to help your kids develop a sense of balance and the ability to say no to fun until the work is done. Don't give in because they cry or complain or raise a fuss. The more you stick firm by the rules you make the more your kids will learn how to set firm boundries and stick to them, even when it's hard. But the younger that's learned, the better, because then these skills can be used earlier (college, etc.) and lead to success more than failure.

Good luck!

Answer 10

you need to eat healthy, that is very important.

no smoking, drinking, eat veggies, fruits, plenty of water.

and after that you need to learn how to just take life easy. let come what may.

dont stress over things, etc.

try and find people to love, etc.

maybe the reason for your "Addictive" personality is you spend time worrying about losing things, instead of enjoying what you have at the moment and who you are with.

Answer 11

that's a statement; not a question.