I have an overprotective mother, and I can't stand her...

Question

When I had both parents my father was never around to give me moral support and my mother was very overprotective of me and judgemental of everyone. She and dad broke up and she constantly compares me with him when we argue. We argue over the stupidest things. Now I'm 20 years old, getting my Associate's Degree and working 2 jobs but I can't stand coming home. I can barely save money to move out because I don't get enough hours in either job to pay for my food, gas, and phone bills and I'd rather keep my classes full time. My mother won't allow me to chose a degree I like, she says if I want to pursue psychology I have to pay for it on my own and live on my own but if I pursue law she'll pay for my pre-law bachelor's degree and let me live in her house until I get to law school. I feel insecure about standing on my own because I have no money and my mother is the only one who can help me but she emotionally abuses me A LOT. And I'm afraid of making many friends or girlfriends because in the past she quickly overjudged them and tainted my view of them. She interferes with every aspect of my life and when I break down and tell her straight to her face that I want MY OWN LIFE and she's being controlling and abusive she invalidates it and calls me a *****, or even throws my the same accusations back in my face. I want to be out there on my own, and I get my license in 2 days. I really need help on how to survive these 2 more years with my mother until I graduate and go out on my own. Please, any kind of advice, I'd be glad to take.

Answer 1

why don't you just put an advert in the newspaper in the area that you would need,i am sure that a lot of people in the same boat,are looking for someone to share digs with,that way you could share the cost,i hope it works out for you............

Answer 2

Thats sort of what my father is like...I feel your pain. But I am 17...

Answer 3

Now you know what her previous husband went through-this is why your mom is single! Now she gets to take it out on you! Listen, you do not have to take her abuse and let her think she gets to choose what you go to school for. You can get loans if she won't help because she doesn't approve of what degree you choose. s***w her! Take a stand and find a roommate to room with, you can make it!!! You will never feel better about yourself as long as you are around the toxic verbal abuse from your mother! I hate people that do this to their kids, they want to control you so you feel dependent and they feel powerful at your expense! You can do it somehow, you will find a way to do yourself the favor you deserve! I believe in you and you will make it in whichever degree you choose. All you need is a good work ethic and desire for your dream, the money will follow! Good Luck!

Answer 4

You can't. Move out NOW and if necessary, take longer to complete your studies, nothing is worth going through all this.

Answer 5

Rent a room which normally is like $500 a month and get a third job or a better job to pay this. I moved out at 16 and been making it on my own every since. Jobs and school can be a challenge but overnight jobs tend to pay better and you can sleep during the day.