I have decided to become the first man to land on the sun?

Question

My reasons are firstly to escape this frightful British summertime we are having and secondly I think claiming the sun as British would be a massive coup for our fair land. My hot air balloon leaves at dawn tomorrow and with god speed we should touch down by sunset, would a sturdy pair of shoes and factor 25 sun block be enough to protect me from the suns rays once I touch down? As I believe I can expect temperatures to be in excess of 37 Celsius a mighty temperature to be sure.

Answer 1

This will not work....I'm sorry mate

a good idea... but far too late

the Chinese got there some time back

.....a little man with a rocket pack

they kept it secret from the West

I don't know why..they thought it best

but He Hung Low...that was his name

never came back..to claim his fame

and somewhere.. up there.... in the sky

his crispy corpse is..........  floating by....

Answer 2

Rotter old bean, might one suggest a flask of G&T and a hamper of the finest foods to accompany you on your journy, might one also suggest the safari suit as the sun can be warm this time of year and dont forget the mosquito spay old bean..the meat munchers can nip somthing horrid ?

please sent a post card when you arrive old bean i am collecting them for the the club...we still have the ones you sent from the moon and the centre of the earth ? tally ho

Answer 3

you forgot to mention....the name of the landing point

Like Cook ....Botany Bay....and don't forget the union jack flag

Remember your British...what what

Answer 4

You're HOT!

Answer 5

Good to see you again, Sir [whatever...sorry I forgot your title.].  And what a scandal that those bumpkins could devalue such a fine aristocrat!  It is sad to see you have to start all over again, but I know that indomitable chin-up spirit will prevail.

As always, I am impressed with your plans of exploration. I thought being the first man on the moon would satisfy your desire to claim a piece of the Cosmos for Her Majesty, but this proposed visit to the sun represents a level of audacity and derring-do so typical of your ilk.  I salute you, sir!  (And I'm an American!)  Best of luck!

Well then, old chap, how's the India campaign coming along?

Answer 6

Happy trip! But I think it would be better if you leave at dusk so you will arrive there at dawn. If you arrive there at sunset then you might not see anything. But bring along a good British umbrella so you don't get a sunburn. But please don't claim the sun for Britain. Ra,will get mad at you.

Answer 7

Well, if you believe in all this "Global Warming" rubbish on Earth....you'd  be a lot cooler over there!!

Answer 8

It's worse than India!

A wide brimmed hat and a stout stick for clearing a path through any locals should do the trick.  Top Ho!

Answer 9

Excellent idea Rotter, you will look dashing and well protected in your Harris tweed!............don't forget your brolly

Answer 10

You shall be missed, good sir.

Ring my mobile on your return voyage and I'll see that a hospital bed is waiting for you. They have an excellent burn unit.

Answer 11

I'm routing for you sir.  You can do it!  Your name will live on throughout all Earth's generations.

Answer 12

Jolly good old chap, I say.......make sure you claim the blighter for good old Queen Victoria don't you know!

You might consider taking a cold drink with you, just in case.

Answer 13

Don't forget your sunglasses and the union jack.

Answer 14

you may have decided that. but you are not the first idiot to decide to be the first man on the sun.

Answer 15

I think you should build yourself a set of wings and glue them together with wax and then jump off a cliff towards the sun.

Answer 16

May I point out a suggestion Sir, but wouldn't it be better to fly at night?

Answer 17

Sun block is for pansies.  Rub tanning lotion on instead (get some of that ultra strong stuff that makes your skin feel like it's covered in acid).

Answer 18

Sorry to inform you, but you can't land on the sun. It's a ball of gas. You can only "land" on solid objects.

Answer 19

Just remember to take plenty of bottled water , can't trust these foreign water supplies you know ! Mind where you sit , don't want the old farmers flaring up again . Last but not least  take an umbrella , you know what weather forecasts are like ! Have a good one sir .

Answer 20

You'll have to practise by standing on a burning hob (in your bare feet) for a while first.

Nothing like a bit of acclimatization.

Answer 21

You've been reading Verne? Wasn't he French?

---

Tales from the Milky Way bar:

I made an astronomical mistake at work the other day.  I wanted a Mars bar, which is available in the candy machine.  But i pressed the wrong number, and got a Milky Way bar instead.

--

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.  They have a few beers, pay, and leave.  On the way out, one of them says, "Say! I think i lost an electron!"  The other asks, "Are you sure?".  The first says, "I'm positive."

--

A neutron walks in, sits at the bar, and asks the bartender for a beer.  The bar gives it one (yes - neutrons are gender neutral). After finishing the beer, the neutron reaches into it's pocket to pay. But the bartender waves his hands and says, "For you - no charge."

Answer 22

Your have a weird sense of humor.. :)

GoRa Neateye

Answer 23

i think you might need factor 30, the sun is hotter than my pants, good luck sunshine

Answer 24

Good Morning Sir,

May I suggest that you take some cucumber sandwiches along, as I do not think you will make it by sunset, also you will probably need a stout brolly to keep the Sunlight from setting fire to your moustache.

Jolly good luck old chap!

Answer 25

I don't quite think the term "Land" is appropriate. Possibly "Become incinerated" would be more accurate. lol

Answer 26

Sun will be pretty hot.  I think you might want to go at night.

Answer 27

just make sure you're there at night, it will be more pleasant that way.

Answer 28

I would suggest you go at night.

Answer 29

hot air baloon! How has no one else picked up on that part?!:P LOL

Answer 30

I say governor, your admirers standing nearby with the white smocks and butterfly net are pleased with the trajectory of your thoughts for soon enough they shall once again be gainfully employed.  Do send me a postcard, old sport..

Answer 31

jolly good! bring your cup of tea and wait until sunset its cooler there ;)