I have problems with my step-dad.. what do i do?

Question

im 16 year old and my real parents have been divorced since i was 1. My mom when i was younger around 6 met this guy that started coming into the picture. he was a very nice and respectful guy and seemed like a really nice guy to be around. We ended up moving in with him when i was 9 and that changed my outlook on him forever. Hes always had this attitude and always out to get me kind of thing. he used to yell at me for having my elbow on the table, not cleaning off my dishes, having my tv on for the 5 minutes im out of the room and used to put me in the corner for 2 hours at a time when i would come in the house ONE minute late. Well i started getting older and yelling like that changed because i got smarter the way i did things. I always feel like im walking on egg shells around him. But now the things are a bit different now i will get yelled at for not asking him formally to go somewhere instead of asking MY mom and he will yell at me for having the tv on 1 minute later than my bedtime and im only allowed to take ONE shower a day and i have to take my shower before 9 PM or i cant take it and all these rules that if broken all hel would break loose. he is like a crazy psycho guy. he does nothing but to go out of his way to try and yell at me. he says he doesnt hate me and im just so fed up with it. i kinda had a splitting moment and i told my mom once again how i felt and she talked ot him. he says its my fault that we dont have a relationship and he beleive that EVERYYY TIME i see him i have to start the convo. i havee to say hi or he will ***** about it. i have to say goodbye. or he will not say anything. he doesnt care about me. he says its my fault for everything. the list is almost endless. what should i do about this im running out of options here =[ if u answer something that requires more information please ask me and i willl get back to you within 5 minutes of u asking it please help. Thankss

Answer 1

He sounds like a control freak, unless you are exaggerating. If he does the same to your mother - demanding exact actions at precise times - he is one. If he just does it to you, I'm at a loss.

There aren't any simple answers. In two years you'll be 18 and can move out. (Or, you may come home on your 18th birthday and find your clothes in a heap on the front porch, and the locks changed. Be prepared for that.)

If your real dad would take you, it might solve some problems. It would probably open some new ones.

For the time being, play the game by his rules. They are clear enough, if stupid. Do what he asks, just like it was a game of softball or you were an actor in a bad movie. Take your shower at 8, say hello and goodbye every time you come into the room with him, call him "Sir".

You can go through the motions and not believe in what you are saying. All those Marine recruits shouting "Yes Sir" and "I love my rifle more than my mother" are play acting for their sergeant. You can too.