I have some major doubts?

Question

So my Orientation for my college started yesterday; this was my dream school and now I'm miserable. I'm commuting to school and I guess I'm like one of five because it's a small school; I feel so left out like everybody already has their groups and I have nobody. I'm at home now because I just feel left out. They make you feel so bad for commuting; who has 7 grand laying around? How can I feel better, I feel so miserable, like I made the wrong choice and I just feel absolutely miserable. Are these feelings normal? I just want to feel better. Thanks.

Answer 1

don't feel bad. if you feel like a loner or something just because you don't know anyone....DON'T FEEL THAT WAY. it's college, not high school. i'm guessing your a freshman...it's normal all freshman feel like that because of the transition from high school to college. in high school it's all about who has the most friends and a bunch of useless drama, in college, most people just mind their own business and do their own thing (especially for those who work).

don't worry, people aren't going to point at you and laugh cuz you're walking alone or eating lunch by yourself....if anyone does do that, they're immature and they need to grow up (or get beat up).

but, yea...don't feel bad. just meet new people in your classes. there are probably other freshman who feel the same.  

Answer 2

Your feelings are completely normal!  I went to a small college with a predominately residential student population - the off-campus students had it quite tough.  However, many learned to fit in quite well.  Try some of these tips:

- Do your best to meet everyone you can during Orientation.  It'll be hard if you're shy, but try your best to stick your neck out.  Say hi to these people whenever you see them on campus over the next few months.

- Spend as much time as you can on campus, especially in major places like the library, cafeteria, campus center, etc.  Again, say hi to faces you see a lot.  Also, don't be afraid to sit with someone you don't know.  Sure, it's uncomfortable at first, but on-campus students are just as nervous about meeting new people (you at least have the luxury of going home to people you know nightly!)

- Find extracurricular activities you think you might enjoy and go to their meetings.  This may mean being on campus a LOT longer than you'd really like, but sometimes you have to make some sacrifices in order to meet people.  

- Groups change from week to week and semester to semester freshmen year.  Meet as many people as you can and you'll see yourself gravitating to certain ones more than others.  Get phone numbers, join Facebook, and smile.  Seriously, it helps.

- Organize study groups in the library before tests (even with just the person sitting next to you in class). Start with a "Wow, this test seems like it could get tricky.  Do you maybe want to get together and study some time?"  

Trust me, things will get easier.  I hated my college when I first started it, but learned to love it very quickly once I started sticking my neck out. Best of luck!

Answer 3

Students that commute do miss out a lot on being apart of the student life on campus.  It is part of the choice you made to be a commuter.  If it is really important to you, apply for a loan, financial aid, scholarships, whatever it takes and you can be apart of the on campus experience.  If it is not all that important to you, then save yourself the expense but know you will miss out on a part of college life.  I would say to do it just for the first year, you will make a ton of friends, and if you begin commuting after, you will still have those friends who live on campus and you can hang out with them at their dorm rooms.

Answer 4

I go to a commuting college, as in only a few people live on campus,  that is relatively small. At first I had doubts too because I felt like I was missing out on the college experience by not getting to live in the dorms and by missing out on alot of activities that go on in larger colleges.  No matter how small the school is, there will always be plenty of activities. Try looking for clubs, dances, service activities, and sororities/fraternities if your school has them.  Your major department usually has special clubs and activities designed for students who are persuing the same major so you can meet people with alot of your same interests.  Just reach out and try to meet people in your classes, join clubs, and participate in the activities.  Most colleges have a student union building where students can hang out, eat, and do homework so try hanging out there.

Answer 5

It's only your first day and it's hard to feel left out when everyone already has someone to hang out with, but don't get too down. It'll get better. Once you start classes, it'll be much better because you'll meet other people and can form friendships that aren't just with new people in your orientation group. It'll get better once you're in a routine and can start classes and meet others. If people make fun of you, that tells you who NOT to be friends with. You can meet others who aren't so insecure that they feel they have to put you down to bring themselves up. You an also find friends away from school so you're not left out of social activities. That's tough. Hang in there.