I have some social problems? Help?

Question

I have a huuuuge foot-in-the-mouth problem, even if I watch what I say. I have really low tolerance for annoying people, and I get frustrated if my team loses. I want to be like, a really nice person and all, and not really loud (haha, i'm freakishly loud right now), so that more people can like me. Basically, I kinda sorta maybe ish want to be popular. FINE, correction. I WANT TO BE POPULAR. :( and it's not working. Any good ways to "cure" this thing? Haha. Oh, and I'm waaaay too sarcastic and a lot of the times, people get offended because they don't get my jokes :( help?

Answer 1

Congrats:) I love sarcastic people. I adore House-isms and caustic humour. Find people like you and you'll be the cream of the crop.

Answer 2

Hmm. I’m reminded of an Indian mythological story of a (human) king called Trishanku, who wished to go to heaven, but insisted on getting there in his earthly form. Obviously, the ‘heavenly norms’ wouldn’t allow that, so he remained suspended forevermore between heaven and earth, i.e., neither here nor there.

Fact is ‘social problems’ and ‘popularity’ can’t go together; you need to transform one to get the other.  If your “I WANT TO BE POPULAR” wish is, like King Trishanku’s, only on your terms, you too end up neither here nor there.

The barriers to your popularity are those you describe - low tolerance, frustrated, loud and so on.  If you are to overcome them, your assumptions about people and attitudes to them must change, alongwith the action strategies you devise to interact with them.  

Just watching what you say doesn’t work because meaning isn’t carried by spoken words alone. Your body language – tone of voice, expression, gestures, postures, etc., are far more eloquent transmitters of what you actually mean to say.  

Like, you have to be “a really nice person” for people to accept without doubt that you’re one. For them to like you, treat them always as you’d want them to treat you. And to be popular, you need to genuinely think about others before you think about yourself.

Answer 3

Wow you seem to be really fast-minded,

I guess ur more 'socially energetic' so to speak,

And if u can manage to slow ur mind down a bit,

NOT put every detail into every possible opening of the conversation, you wont seem AS outgoing.

The thing i notice about ur type of personality is that u want to force every detail you possibly can into a short conversational opening/space.

You need to realise that conversations are give and take, and your taking too much, whilst not letting others give what they can.

Find a way to manage ur speedy mind,

like practicing some technique to amuse ur mind whilst letting the speaker say their part.

I find (even tho im an introvert) that analysing what someone says while they say it is a good way to share, by waiting for all they have to say...

Hope i helped =S

btw "sarcasm is the lowest form of wit"

try another form...

Answer 4

You can either find people similar to you, or try to be popular.  If you want to be popular, you'll have to work on changing the ways you act.  That's hard.  No matter what, you should really try to be observant of how you treat other people.  Maybe your foot in the mouth problem originates from you not paying enough attention to what's going on around you.  I don't know.