I have to give a wedding speech?

Question

i have to give a wedding speech, toast to the groom. i'm looking for a few good wedding jokes to tell. any suggestions?

Answer 1

Say, "I want to say a few words about s*x.  It gives me great pleasure.  Thank you."

Answer 2

here's one:

Why did the chicken cross the road?

- to get away from his wife (drums)

..But seriously why did the chicken cross the road?

- to cross the street to get a prenup from the lawyers office (drums)

But seriously folks..Marriage is not like what you imagined. It's going to take a lot of work, committment, honesty and forgiveness. So just buy her a house and get some therapy (drums)

ouch!