I have zero confidence, so can I build some up?

Question

I'm not a very social person. Don't get me wrong, I mean, I'm not a total outcast or anything, like I have a girlfriend and some really good close friends, but when it comes to being 'out and about' I usually keep to myself. I'm S****y at being confident, and I'm usually pretty quiet around strangers, mostly due to the fact that my parents have kept me pretty sheltered. (I'm 15 right now.) Today, I'm going to sign up for boxing classes at a gym near my house, I'm really hoping that the interaction boxing requires will boost my confidence. However, when I meet the instructor I don't want to seem like a total introvert. How the h**l can I force myself to be a little more relaxed and social when I meet the guy? Don't suggest that I "Quit being a q***r," because I'm doing this in an attempt to improve myself, which is hard to look down upon in my opinion.

Answer 1

Well, in my experience the reason why we seem insecure is becuase we are afraid of how others perceive us.  I was very shy and in turn people thought I was stuck up.  I didn't have very many friends but I had had some good close friends that saw me for who I was.  Boosting your confidence is not an easy task, but the one thing you should remember is that you aren't going to be like everyone else and you are who you are.  The people that don't like you isn't your fault.  If someone doesn't want to be your friend or get to know you then that is there decision.  When it comes to meeting this instructor, you just make sure that you inform him that you are there to learn and put the best effort towards it.  Just remember he is getting paid to help you so it doesn't really matter if he likes you the best or not.  Just ask questions and try your hardest.  There is nothing wrong with being you and people who are good hearted will respect you for it.  Everyone makes mistakes and has some insecure moments.  It isn't that big of a deal it might seem like it but it isn't.  Good Luck and I know you can get over your confidence issues.  You have more going for you then you know.

Answer 2

Recognize your insecurities. What does that voice in the back of your mind say? What makes you ashamed of yourself? This could be anything from acne, to regrets, to emotional abuse (past or present) from a loved one or friends at school. Whatever is making you feel unworthy, ashamed, or inferior, identify it, give it a name, and write it down.

Talk about it with friends and loved ones. Wear it on your sleeve. Each day you should chip away at it; wear it down. There's no quick fix. Get to the root of the problem; focus on it and understand that you need to resolve each issue before you can move on.

Remember that no one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in any of our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality. Learn that life is full of bumps down the road.

Identify your successes Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.

Be thankful for what you have. A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.

Be Positive, even if you don't feel positive. Avoid self-pity, or the pity and sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior--they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others. By doing so, you reinforce those ideas in your mind and encourage your growth in a positive direction.

Look in the mirror and smile. Studies surrounding what's called the "facial feedback theory" suggest that the expressions on your face can actually encourage your brain to register certain emotions. So by looking in the mirror and smiling every day, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run.



I am gorgeous, huh?Fake it. Along the same lines of smiling to make yourself feel happy, acting confident might actually make you believe it. Pretend you're a completely confident version of you; go through the motions and see how you feel.

Express yourself, whether it's through art, music, writing, etc. Find something you enjoy. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. If it's difficult to name two or three things you have some ability in or just plain love to do, think about things others do that you would like to do too and take some lessons or join an enthusiasts club. When you're following your passion, not only will it have a therapeutic effect, but you'll feel unique and accomplished, all of which can help build your self confidence. Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends!

Stick to your principles. It might be tough, but if you don't have something you can believe in, you don't have anything. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything. No matter what's happened in your life, you can always lay claim to the fact that from this day forward, you've followed your principles to the best of your ability.

Help others.When you know you're kind to the people around you, and are making a positive difference in other people's lives (even if it's just being kinder to the person who serves you coffee in the morning), you'll know that you are a positive force in the world--which will boost your self confidence. Go volunteer twice a month at an elementary school. Bake something for your neighbor for no reason. Confidence that you have earned is the most long-lasting.

Stop worrying. What worries you today will be forgotten by you and people around you tomorrow. Can you remember what you were so worried about the same day the same time last week? If not, then you should not worry right now. You will not worry about it even one week from now.

Answer 3

good for you. easy 10 points

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 4

http://www.essortment.com/all/howtogainc...

Answer 5

most people are insecure. u just gotta live with it.

Answer 6

I'm 13 teen years old and I'm not really social person ether, but eventually I got more confidence. Just give it more time and I think taking the Boxing classes will help.

Answer 7

I feel for you because I went through the same when I was your age... and still have a phobia when in a social situation.  It is tough but you can do it.  First of all smile and look people in the eye...it is hard ,but that breaks the ice and shows everyone you carry yourself well.  Ask easy breezy questions that shows you are accessible and not too aloof...stay away from controversy like religion, politics, things that would be considered "not cool"  Remember to smile and look confident...and keep reminding yourself you can do this...it is not brain surgery.  I still have to talk myself into going to social events because I am introverted by nature but I constantly put myself out there because otherwise I will crawl into my shell...surround yourself with people who laugh and make you feel good.  Sometimes the environment drags you down also.

Keep up beat...many people think I am very outgoing but I am really a walking panic attack...I just don't give in to it.  Good Luck I am pulling for you

Answer 8

do crack

Answer 9

No, you're a failure and your life will never amount to anything.

End it quickly.