I just had a baby in new york state (live there as well) and the father isn't on the birth certificate and ?

Question

the baby has my last name. My whole pregnancy he's been saying "get an abortion, you're ruining my life!" Now the baby is here, and i let him be involved because I thought it was the right thing to do but he only comes to see the baby once in a while and doesn't call to see how she is in between visits. I would really like him to just go away but i'm not sure as though he will or that there's really a way to get him to go away. Also, if i put someone else on the birth certificate (that's not the biological father) can he do anything about it? He threatens to take the baby away from me all the time so Im trying to get as much information as i can about my rights vs his. Anything will be helpful!

Answer 1

Okay, well, you won't be able to put the non biological father on the birth cerificate because they will do a dna test, unless someone legally adopts her, which the father would have to sign off on. They will probably do a split custody unless you can get him for abadonment, but that's hard to do as he is visiting her. Is he contributing money for her? If not, you need to file for support but will have to put him on the birth certificate. Also, be careful because a lot of deadbeat dads like to beat their ex in filing their taxes and will file so they get the tax refund instead of you. The IRS will fix it, eventually, but it takes quite a while. You are the primary caregiver and have full custody as of right now because he's not on the birth certificate, but if he pushes he will be able to get split rights. As long as he's not on there, he can do nothing, in fact if he was to try and take off with her, you could get him for kidnapping. My friend went through this and is still trying to work things out, but she was stupid and put the dad on her son's bc. He took off with her son and hid for a week and the cops couldn't do a thing about it. He has two older daughters who he spends 100s of dollars on for birthdays and xmas, and he got his only son a 3 dollar plane and took him out to eat, once in his 3 years of life. But as it stands, he has no rights, so be careful about what you do.

Good luck!  

Answer 2

I live in nys and I am trying to get the father on the bc. First off you cant just put anyones name as the father on the bc, he has to sign the paperwork to fill it out, and there has to be witnesses to do that. What you have to do is to talk to a family lawyer about all of this, usually they go for the mother about this kind of stuff. Deff. talk to a family lawyer at least is my suggestion!  

Answer 3

To get better answers you should post this question in Politics & Government: Law & Ethics

Answer 4

If his name isn't on that birth certificate he doesn't have rights to anything regarding your baby. You could move across the world and he couldn't stop you from it. You don't have to let him see the baby. I wouldn't put someone else's name on the birth certificate though. If he wants to try to take the baby then there would have to be DNA tests done and everything and it usually takes a little while. The courts could hit him with back child support also from the time the baby was born til it gets settled.  

Answer 5

WoW, that's a rotten situation to be in.

Why would he want to take your baby away from you if he isn't even interested in her?

I don't have any advise I'm afraid, just want to wish you good luck.

Answer 6

Contact the courts and talk to a facilitator.  They will be able to answer any questions you have.

Answer 7

he doesnt have the right to take your baby away from you, especially when his name is not on the birth certificate and if he is not there for your baby.  

Answer 8

first off, you cant go back and add someone to the birth certificate after the fact unless a paternity test is done so thats outta the question. second, this happens alot. most women just see the 'warm and cozzy' side of things and want their kids to have a dad instead of no dad but end up finding out a part-time dad can be even worse. my advice would to be start documenting when he sees her (or how often he doesnt) and how much he calls or what he calls about (again, or lack thereof) and then slowly stop letting him see her. when he gets to the point that he wants to take you to court for visitation, you'll have the proof that he wasnt there as often as he should have been. wait, is he paying support? if he isnt, there reason to stop visits right now. if he is, there should be a visitation order in place. best thing to do is get one asap cuz as long as you cant prove him to be unfit, a judge will contine to allow him visitation but it will be on a set schedule. chances are he wont like that but either way you'll know when his time is and that thats all the time he has and if he doesnt stick to it, then you can take him back to court and fight for him to have less/no visitation due to unsteady environment.