I just have a question about why kids act a certain way? My husband and I were watching a super nanny show ?

Question

night and these kids were hitting and kicking, spitting and just out of control towards the parents, and the parents acted like they had NO control whatsoever, so my question is, how do the kids end up this way? Is it because the parents failed? Or the parents let them be spoiled or what?

We have a 7 month old and we already know he will NOT be running our lives but we just didn't understand how parents let their kids get like this..Thanks!!

Answer 1

Complete lack of discipline. I will probably get lots of thumbs down for this, but if my son acted the way the kids on those shows do I would spank his butt. I would never let a child have the run of my house.  

Answer 2

hm good question i nevr thot of it tht way

Answer 3

The parents on that show do not discipline their children, and then they run wild. If they would discipline their problems would be nonexistant.

Answer 4

No I'm sorry sweetie you don't know how he is going to be. My sister has a 2 yr old extremely hyper child and cannot even take him in public. I have been a huge part of his life since he was born and We have tried everything with him time outs, spankings, and you know what that is pretty much the only options you have to displine a child that age and guess what they don't work and he cannot be put on medication until he is in preshcool. All kids are different, just like all adults are different. I have a 18 month old and she is an angel thank god! But I don't think you should judge all these other parents until you have walked in there shoes.

Answer 5

It's the parents' initial response when the children started acting like this. All kids will test their parents to see where the boundries are - if parents act like there is nothing that can be done about it then the children learn quickly that the power is THEIRS! It is lack of parenting skills or it's being afraid to be a diciplinarian (I don't want my child to hate me or see me as the bad guy - I want to be the nice parent!). I am a firm believer that kids MUST be taught by age 2-3 that they must have manners, they must respect and obey their parents and throwing tantrums will get them nowhere. It is really for their own safety, as well as peace in the house.

What these parents fail to realize is - this is not helping their child grow up to be a productive citizen, by withholding discipline, and it creates chaos in the home. Any house that runs well with happy well-adjusted kids is a house where BOTH parents have established their place as head of the household and the kids know "the buck stops here with mom and dad".

Another thing to consider is an allergy which is causing behavioral problems (probably not the case though if all of the children are acting like this). My youngest daughter was allergic to dairy and to soy and she threw absolute fits when she had any - it was very dramatic to see the change in her behavior. She totally could not help it and when she was 3, we did an elimination diet (removing dairy first) and she became her good sweet self 24/7, within 1 week. I've seen kids allergic to a certain tree react the same way without their medication.

Meant to add - the safety issue comes in (and I have witnesses this and had to save 2 boys from being hit by a car when they wouldn't listen to mom) - if the kids are not taught to always obey mom and dad (and any other adult in the family that you tell your children is safe) - are they going to listen when they are in danger and do not know it? If my kids were about to get hit by a car, or I needed them to come with me RIGHT NOW, I knew all I had to do was say, "Come here by me" or whatever and my kids listened without hesitating. Do you think the kids on the show would react like that 100% of the time or would they fight, disobey or throw a fit instead?

Gotta love it when the toddlers talk back to mom and dad too - what do they think the kids will be like as teenagers?

Answer 6

Personally, I think its bad parenting. My stepdaughter is almost 8 and she would NEVER act like that. Shes not the perfect kid either, she talks back and does things she shouldn't but she would never even try to hit me.

Alot of those kids get whatever they want, eat candy and drink soda all day so that is a big part of it.

My 8 month old will not act like that either!

Answer 7

If that's the same one I saw last night, I totally know what you mean!  I know I don't always know how to handle certain things when it comes to discipline and my daughter, but hitting, spitting, and wiping boogers on things are just things my daughter knows aren't allowed.  I was wondering the same thing about how they even get that bad.  It's weird to watch kids like that when you've never had to deal with those things when it comes to your own child.  A lot of it I'm guessing, from watching the whole show, is just the kids acting out for attention (from the dad) and getting away with it.  They probably figure some attention from him (even though negative) was better than no attention at all.  I also liked the 50 warnings from the mom in the car!  lol  Why bother wasting your breath?!  Geez.  Oh well, I hope things have changed permanently for the family, they seemed to adjust well on the show by the end.

Answer 8

I prolly speak for myself when i say this. Super nanny is made for the parents who choose NOT to spank. I know it might sound a lil off but i spank, and i have not had the 2 year old biting... the tantrums of the 2 year old. He does get swatted... but it is not alot of spanking... maybe a swat but nothing more then a swat or 2. he knows when he is acting up, i say... *imma swat you if you dont stop.* One 2 3. and then the swat if i have to count to three.

They did not fail you cant fail till you give up. since they are on the nanny show they are asking for help. But i think to make it that far you have given up.

The children on the show have prolly never been told not to act a certin way. they just do as they please and get away with it. almost like they do what they want when they want. If a child never learns that they cant do certin things they will do them and then it is too late to tell them no. So they need to learn that they cant do things, and stick to it.

I hope i have not confused you!

Answer 9

i think its guilt.  

i don't have any kids but i noticed that the parents on those shows appear to be uncomfortable with discipline. its almost as though they feel guilty.  

the nanny told this one guy to tell his daughter not to hit him.  he said in a very passive way, "u can't hit daddy", while he is saying this he is gently rubbing her hair and taking it out of her face.

Answer 10

you have to hit kids i remember when i was little like 5 or 6 i tryed to hit my mom and then she hit me (hard) and i never tryed that again  

Answer 11

Well, if some of those kids on there are ADHD I can understand that.  I have a 9 yr old son that is severely ADHD and couldn't do a thing with him. I couldn't even take him out in public without him embarrassing the c**p out of me. Thank GOD he has outgrown some of it!  So if I ever wanted to go out and eat rather than cook dinner, I went somewhere where I could go through the drive-thru or ordered pizza and had it delivered.  The truth is, you can say your child isn't going to be that way all you want, but you really have no idea HOW your child is gonna be.  They each have their own personalities and are gonna be the way they want no matter how hard you try to change them and make them what you want them to be.  I also have 2 daughters and neither of them have EVER done anything like my son! It's not always bad parenting.  It could be, but not always.  not in my case.  I've raised my kids all the same, treated them the same, disciplined them the same and they're all different.  Just like adults.  You're never going to get the same results out of any 2 children no matter how hard you try!  Sorry!  It just isn't like that!

Answer 12

People just don't discipline like they used to.  

Answer 13

Hahaha, I watched that last night too.  The dad was a douche bag in my opinion.  

All I know is Johnny BETTER not act like that.  

Answer 14

I wonder the same thing my daughter is 3 and she watches the shows with me some times and she always says "Mommy those kids need the time out chair" I think it's funny that she knows this and she is 3. I don't know why I think it's because they don't use effective discipline if time outs aren't working then they should taking away toys or something and they aren't consistent that's why they end up on those  shows.

Answer 15

I honestly think most of the time it is the parents fault...they don't put their foot down early on so the kids know they can get away with it..

Answer 16

most of the time it is from lack of discipline. they parents on there do not punish their children like they should and they are normally ( pay attention and you will see this too ) upper scale families, so they spoil the c**p outta these kids and then the let them do what they want to, and then when they act like complete hoodlems, the parents do not understand.

And then you also have to remember that there are the rare cases when they get a family with a ADHD child on there, and trust me from experience, that is real and hard to handle.

good luck with your child.

Answer 17

From what I can see from those shows, the parents have no control over their children. Some spoil them and other can't control what they do ( more so if they have a lot of children). It's a discipline thing. And you have to realize that it's a t.v thing also, the show won't take a family that has little problem, they will take a family that they can do a show with so they have people to watch.  

Answer 18

i think it's just because the parents never do anything about it but yet again when someone tries and tells them what to do that's NOT their kids they start acting like the kids. so yeah i think it's just because the parent's attitudes have a huge effect on the kids. my advice if you don't want that to happen to your kid just don't yell really loud or smack them when they do something bad-- put them in time out or something that way they'll no what they did wrong and not think that you did something wrong and that's why they got smacked. im not telling you what to do or anything but since i babysit i see this type of thing happen about every day. lol but yeah just good luck and idk why people let their kids act like that

Answer 19

It simply comes down to the fact that people have kids when they are not mature enough to handle them. They are too self-motivated to really care what happens with their kids. If you notice, the first thing they always tell the Nanny in the beginning is that THEY are unhappy because of their kids and how much it is inconveniencing THEM. They never express selfless concern for their kids. Quite honestly, if they had any concept of that, they would not have bad kids to begin with.

Plus, having kids takes a spine. You can't "soft shoe" with them. You have to be firm and consistent.

Also realize that it's TV, and it is hard to tell where fact ends and fiction begins. Some sensationalizing has to go on, or the show would be boring.

Answer 20

A lot of it is due to lack of proper discipline.  They say no, but they don't follow through.  And often the parents on those shows are too focused on their own lives to really focus on their kids, so the kids are acting out to get attention.  There was one I saw where the mom was so focused on cleaning house and keeping up appearances that she was totally neglecting her kids.  Once she put the broom away and played with them, their behavior improved drastically.  

Answer 21

It is because parents have created this. They haven't provided adequate structure and they give to much power to a child who has no clue what to do with it. Some kids repeat behavior they see from parents, some act out to get attention even if it is negative attention, some aren't properly or consistently disciplined. I could go on and on, but 99.9% of the time it is the parents creation.