I just need to know if it me or very mother?

Question

ok i have three kids age 8 yrs old boy and twin girls 2 yrs old

i am not looking for anyone to feel sorry for me in any way thats not why i am here . i feel like i am loseing my mind with these kids my girls are into every thing and they don't stop the fright with eachother pull hair bitting the works my son is a good boy he goes to camp half of day i dont work and have no help all day with my kids my husband works 12 hours a day 6 day a week .. my question is does every mother at some point feel like there are losing there minds or is it me and what do i do i love all of my kids with every thing i have but i feel like i need some space is this wrong to feel like this

Answer 1

It is absolutely not wrong to feel this way. Of course you love your kids. I have 2 kids and I often feel frustrated and overwhelmed. I understand your husband works 12 hours, 6days but you are working 24 hours 7days a week.  Tell him you need just a little time alone. Maybe a couple of hours at the mall once a week even. Or ask him to watch the kids for an hour while you have a bath. It is not good for the kids if you are always stressed. You must take some time for yourself to re charge and this will make you a better mom to your kids. Do you have other family or friends that can help or watch the kids for a little while. Use akk your resources, you dont have to do it all. Maybe join a mother's group in your community...just get out a little!

Answer 2

Of course your daughters are getting in to everything, they are toddlers.  This means you have to keep an eye on them more often.  They are also going through "The terrible twos" so they are going to take it out on one another.  When they start getting physical seperate them and place them both in time out.  One in one room the other in another room.  You might also think about hiring a teenager or college student to come in as "mother's helper" to help you with your kids until they have passed this phase.

Answer 3

We have all felt this way. My husband works a ton as well and it is so maddening at times. I would say it is time to implement time out and the corner on your twins. 2 years old is definitely old enough for punishment. Once you get them a bit more in control it will help some but bottom line they are 2. I found no quick fix and thought i would go crazy many times. All I can say is it does get better with age. As they get older it does get better. Hang in there, mine are 7 and 9 and as I look back I am so glad I stuck it out and stayed home with them. There were days the shower was my only space LOL and one of them would open it to ask me for something. Hang in there.

Answer 4

I hear you.  Your son's a good boy, so you got that going on.  Just try, try, try to remember that the 2 year olds will grow out of their bad habits as long as you handle it right.  I thought I would lose it with my 2 year old from the time she was born.  Now she's almost 2 1/2 and is getting better.

Answer 5

It sounds like you need some YOU time. Do you have someone who could watch the kids once a week or maybe your husband can keep them while you just go out with a friend or go window shopping or something to just get out for awhile by yourself. Every parent needs that in order to ease the stress.

With your twins, try and be as consistent as you can. NOW is the time to have set rules and be cosnistent in your discipline. It's sometimes easier to give in or ignore bad behavior but it will only get worse then.

Also try and keep a good routine. The more structure you have the better behaved the kids will be and the less stress you will have.

Answer 6

Hiiii,

Yes we all certainly feel this way at some point (hahaha) my sister is 36 and has 6 children ranging from 18yrs to 15 mnth old twin boys so i understand completely as she loses her mind LOTS !!!

You are normal dont worry , just take time out even if it is going to the letter box breathe and count to 10 hahaha.

All the best :-)

Shelly

Answer 7

yes, i go through that too..

you totally need a vacation from your kids, even if just for one night.

if nothing else make them all stay in their rooms one night just to give you a break.

Answer 8

You are not alone.  

Get some help.  If a man works 12 hour days and doesn't make enough money to pay for some help for you, he is an idiot.   If you remain with such a person, you are also.

Answer 9

Yeah, almost every mother feels nutty from time to time.

Your girls are at a tough stage. My motto at that age was to keep 'em busy. Develop a list of "okay" activities, and be ready to get them started on any one of them whenever they get into stuff or pick on each other. For example, if they are always good in the bathtub, give them a bath. I had one kid that I bathed 3 times in one day, simply because it was the only way I could get her to pipe down.

Here are some more ideas:

Buy cheap paint brushes. Take them outside and give them each a brush and a pail of water and tell them to paint the driveway or sidewalk or even the house. Harmless and kids just love it for some reason.

Give them old newspapers or magazines and some paper-only scissors and let them cut them up and fill a paper sack with them.

Fill a rubbermaid tote with about 3" of plain, raw rice and stick it on the kitchen floor while you are cleaning or cooking. Give them sand toys and let them play in the rice. (Rice is a ton easier to vaccuum up than sand.)

Save out the plastic bowls, containers and utensils from the dishwasher and let them stand on chairs at the kitchen sink and wash them in lukewarm water. You'll have to wash the stuff over again (or beforehand), but it's amazing how much they love that sort of thing.

Turn on music and DANCE. Get out the camcorder so they can watch themselves when they get tired.

Put some of their baby-to-todder photos in small photo albums (taping the photo sleeves shut so they can't destroy it) and let them look at themselves. You can tell them stories about themselves, too.

Let them help fold laundry. At 2, they can sort socks by color into piles for you. They can also learn how to fold small towels, washcloths -- anything square or rectangular -- by laying them flat and folding corner to corner. If you have to refold stuff later, no big deal.

You get the idea. Some of these things last a minute, some 5 minutes, some 20 minutes. But thats 1-20 minutes without them screaming or fighting or whatever, so that will make your day go better.

Answer 10

Yes we all feel like that at some point. I am a stay at home mom of a 4 year old and a 2 year old who are always fighting. On your husband's day off ask him to watch the kids for an hour and then take off.

Answer 11

i hate to be the one to tell you this but, your husband is not being a very caring Father nor Husband... If he cares about his children, he has to give their care giver a break from time to time... and if he loves his wife, he would want to do something to ease her stress... God forbid, but what if something happens that you CAN NOT take care of them? What would he do then? I say, get some time away, and when he tells you to come home now... tell him you will be home as soon as you can and maybe offer some advice on how to get him through the TEMPORARY crisis he is experiencing... the children are not your sole responsibility... you did this together, and should see it out together....

Answer 12

Some do, but I was never like that. I hardly ever misbehaved. You have to punish them! That's my bit of advice. For the twins, time outs galore. Take away a toy, Send them to YOUR room (without toys, and tv.)

The boy, if he does something, you should be able to handle that. If not, god help you.