I know he's a player but i need all the advice i can get????

Question

basically i see this guy 2 months every year. last year (2007) we had so much fun. we became good friends and then he would wink at me alot and try to kiss me but i would duck out the way. i live in a different country from him. so this year im back and he was walking down the street and it has been a year since we last saw each other and we held eye contact for so long but didnt say anything. he was with his friends and i was with my cousin. and he gave me this smile that just made me want to melt inside........ later that night i saw him holding hands with some girl that is just my aquattiance . at night time me and him normally hang around in a big group and he was like hugging her from behind and i was standing opposite them and he winked at me i just rolled my eyes at him how did he have the check to risk that infront of his gf. then my best friend told me that in march he cheated on his gf with her and when i heard this i was like OMG! anyway i was walking down the street and he came up behind me and said heyyy! and i said hey i got you a present and he was like omg you ddidn have to and i said i did your such a good friend and he said well im gonna have to get you something to! and i said i have everything i dont need anything just stay my friend and thats enough. and he said im sorry but im gonna have to get you something. and that lil silly disagreement lasted long! and i asked where are you going he said im going to met my gf in a really quite voice and gave me like a half smile. anyway i asked my best friend that he cheated with to ask him if he likes me and she asked him and he said shes cute but not my type! and i felt like telling him you know what i never even noticed you until last year and ur not my type but i love you! anyway know hes gf has gone on hols and hes free from her any tips what is your advice? how shall i give him the gift shall i send him a text and does he like me after all the things he did. what shall i do to tempt him? any help is appreciated(he also tryed to kiss me on the lips when iu was in the shop)

Answer 1

Okay the last part is very confusing but I am a guy and here is my advice to you.

Honey, the guy is not interested!!!! It may be difficult for you to accept this but I am begging you, do not let this idiot play you for a fool like this. Stop deluding yourself into thinking that something can or perhaps will happen between the both of you in the future.

Respect yourself a little and drop this fool from your life. Clearly he is one of those guys who loves the attention he is getting from you and is masking the fact that he is a "nice guy". If he was really a "nice guy" as you believe he is, then he would not be playing these immature childish games with you.

You are not his type and yet he flirts with you with all the kissing and eye contact and winking and ****!!! Do you want to know why he does that? Because firstly, he loves the attention that he gets from you seeing that its obvious to him, and I am sure to everyone else, that you like him. Secondly this is his way of keeping you at bay in his life so that if things should ever go awry with his current gf, he knows he can always come crying to you about how allegedly bad his gf is treating him, knowing fully well that you will drop everything that you are doing just to be there for him.

And of course you know you will drop everything to be there for him and comfort him in his time of need because that's who you are, a good person who cares about the people you love in your life. He already knows this and he is going to make you think that he feels the same way about you and that he loves you for caring about him and then you guys will kiss, kissing will lead to touching, and touching will lead to you know what!!! The next morning you think it means something special and then you don't hear from him for days and weeks. When you do hear from him he tells you it was a mistake and that he "loves" his gf!!!

He cheated on his girlfriend with your friend this March!!! Is that the kind of guy you want to be with? Is this the kind of guy that you would like to call your boyfriend? He CHEATED on his current girlfriend. What makes you think he is NOT going to do the same thing with you.

As I said respect yourself and who you are as a person and get over this guy once and for all. Your friend told you that he is not interested and that he said that you are not his type. He has already made up his mind about you. Nothing you say or do to change who you are is going to be enough for him. If he cannot see the true beauty that you possess now, he is NEVER going to see it.

I say if you want to be friends with him and remain cordial with him, then give him your gift but make sure you let him know that you love him as just a friend. Don't let him think that you are soo in love with him and that you actually took the time out to buy him something. You will only be feeding his already over size ego by doing that.

Honey you will find someone just as gorgeous as he is and when you find this person, he will love you in the way you deserved to be love. Please don't allow other people's c**p to get in the way of you getting what you truly deserve, which is a real boyfriend who only has eyes for you and who loves you for you!!!  

Answer 2

Hello

I dont get what you ment at the end about giving him a gift, i thought he was giving you one? lol.

anyway, you reallly need to talk to this guy and see where his heads at because i think it's important that you and him both know where your relationship is at like just friends or more even tho he has a girlfriend he needs to sort him self out he cant have you both.

Also think to your self do you really like him? is it more then friends? because he lives in a different country it would be hard to have a serious relationship living so far away, maybe its best to stay friends? which ever you chose make sure he knows where the line is. And by the way there is something wrong with the fact he cheated that does make him sound like a bit of a player. But in the end it's up to you.

Good luck!

:)

Answer 3

I'm confused about what you want from this guy? If you just want to hook up with him (ie make out/ s*x a few times) then just send him a text to meet up and give him the gift and get with the guy?

If you want to be his actual girlfriend, I do not see how that is going to work. He told your friend he doesn't like you and he already has a girlfriend, who he cheats on. He's just flirting with you now because he knows you like him and you're a girl. Some guys are like that. If you have serious feelings for him its best to stay away because he doesn't seem to have any for you and probably won't develop any. He might tell you you're his girlfriend or something but chances are he'll have others. If you're OK with that and aren't going to get hurt by what he does then go ahead and text him and hang out with him. Otherwise just ignore him.