I know i seem immature but...?

Question

im embarrased to breast feed...yeah yeah i know, sound silly but im 22, my partener is 26 and his 24 year old brother lives with us, he has no job and just seems to hang around the house all day, now baby is due in about 3 week and i want to breast feed but im a little uneasy about feeding in the same room as his brother, plus he somethimes has his mates round, i know its silly but i feel wiered about getting my boob out infront of him and his mates no matter how natural it is. and i dont feel like i should have to leave a room to feed my baby, he should if anything but how do i tell him without offending him or sounding stupid..

* his brother doesnt work due to illness not just cos he's lazy so we cant make him work!!!

Answer 1

go nurse in your bedroom

your an adult as is your brother so take the baby and nurse in your room

or take a blanket  and cover your self and baby before you take your breast  out before you nurse

Answer 2

You might actually find it easier to breastfeed in a quiet comfortable spot. Maybe make a spot in your room or baby's to feed and that way you dont have to worry about unwanted guests. I am a very private person and have set up a corner in her nursery with rocker to feed, I dont live with anyone but my boyfriend. But at least its a quiet corner for some bonding time. I think once you get started you wont feel this way anymore, most women dont seem to, and you might be more comfortable to tell him to give you some space for a bit. Good luck and dont deprive that baby of such a special time just because of an unwanted guest.

Answer 3

Your question doesn't seem immature at all. It's a perfectly logical concern if you've never breastfed before.... But let me assure you that once you begin, you'll see how discreet it actually is. There is no need to leave the room as long as you have even a regular dinner napkin with you to cover the breast while the baby feeds. You'll be providing not only food, but also your antibodies and essential amino acids your baby can only get from a mother's milk. These will make him/her less likely to have allergies and will increase his/her IQ.

Try it and you'll see how uneventful it will be. Only the first few times is a production, then you'll get the hang of it and no one in the room will even know you're feeding.

Good luck to you ;o)

ps Why do you make one bad answer make you not want to ask anymore? Pay no attention to people who can't even read a question with enough comprehension to get it. I bet he was never breast fed! ;o)

Answer 4

You don't really 'get your boob' out when you breastfeed. Wear a blouse and you can unbutton a little and slip the baby underneath it, or use a shawl to drape over your shoulder.

Answer 5

You really need to make it clear to brother-in-law that having his mates round is not going to be acceptable when you have a new baby. It's not just feeding - you're going to be exhausted, you're going to be emotional, and you are not going to be up to dealing with random strange men in the house. If he's not reasonable about it, maybe you can speak to one of them (do any of them have kids?)

But if he lives there, it seems a shame to miss out on breastfeeding just because you might have to go in another room. To begin with you're likely to have to always breastfeed in the same place anyway (a particular chair or bed) - it takes practice to be able to feed just anywhere. A lot of practice. Several weeks. Since you'll have to pick one room anyway, why not make it your bedroom?

Answer 6

There's ways to breastfeed so that no one sees your breast.

My Dad lived with me for a short time, Yuck!!!!  But.....I still breast-feed with a light flannel sheet over my shoulder.

Never has my Dad said anything to me about the way I was breast-feeding. And of course, With my lazy boy in the corner of the room, and the blanket covering me, no one was able to see anything.

And if your brother-in-law is uncomfortable, believe me , he will leave the room.

So, Good luck with the breastfeeding  

Answer 7

I would just feed the baby wherever is convenient for you. You can ask BIL to look away while you get the baby latched and a blanket over you if that is easier on you. He may feel uncomfortable enough to leave the room when you announce that the baby is hungry.

I would ask him to not have his friends around for a few months after the baby is born.

Once you have had the baby you may not feel as modest about it. I remember nursing my oldest when the maintenance man for our rented house came over. he asked to see the baby. I just pulled my shirt up a tiny bit so you could see his face (and no boob). the poor man turned 3 shades of red and decided to peek later. He did not even realize that I was feeding the baby since I was wearing a big t-shirt that draped around the baby's head

Answer 8

He will probably be more embarassed than you and leave the room when you go to start the feed!

Answer 9

you dont have to 'get your boob out' in front of him...just drape a light blanket over yourself before you feed. If there are alot of people in the room then go into another room just while you are feeding the baby.  There are ways to be modest when breastfeeding, in fact I have been feeding my baby and no one has even noticed, it just looks like Im holding a covered up baby...dont let some guys discourage you from breastfeeding because you will regret it in the end.

Answer 10

1) Just while you're learning what to do, go into your bedroom. Make sure you're really comfy before you start and have everything you need on hand like water (you should drink a lot of water while you are breastfeeding). Once you become more experienced it wont be a matter of you just flopping your breast out - it'll be discreet and you will be able to do it in such a way that no one will be able to see anything.

2) He will most likely look away while you're breastfeeding - it's a reflex for anyone let alone a young guy!

3) Just take it easy and use this time alone (for example while you're in your room alone) with your new baby. It's a great way to maintain that special bond that a baby and mother has.

Research has shown that breastfeeding reduces likelyhood of obeseity later on in life, heart disease, diabetes, skin conditions, sudden infant death syndrome, tooth decay and even has shown that children who were breastfed have a higher IQ than children who were formula / artifically fed. These are only a few benefits to mention!

Don't let something so small come between you breastfeeding your baby. The benefits of breast feeding are endless - b*****s aren't just for foreplay they are there to provide all of the nutrients required for a baby to grow and develop.  

Answer 11

I would just tell him the truth most likely he will be the one to leave the room due to him being uncomfortable

Answer 12

So nurse in your bedroom.  Or ask them to turn away while you get baby latched on and then put a towel over your shoulder.  I think once you try it you'll find it's not so big a deal as you think it is now.

Tons of mothers nurse in very public places, and no one is the wiser.  Nobody sees them "get their boob out."  You can do it quite discreetly if you practice.

Answer 13

It's not immature at all to be uncomfortable with breast feeding in front of people who you are not extremely close to.  It's natural.  Even animal mothers find a secure-feeling place to nurse their babies.

Your first weeks with your new baby are a very precious, personal time for you, and you have every right to all the private time you need.  Discuss with the brother that he needs to meet up with friends elsewhere for awhile, and that you'd appreciate it if he remained scarce for awhile.  You don't have to offer up the specifics of the breast feeding issue because there are a number of reasons why a new mother would need her space.  Offer him some new videogames, books, or movies so he can quietly keep to himself in one area of the home so he's out of your hair. Hopefully he will be understanding and a compromise could be made.