I know you've heard this problem a million times but...?

Question

i really need someones advice. And it involves a guy (what a shocker i know) but I just recently started my senior year at a brand new school. There's a guy who helps out for the volleyball team at my school. I really really really like this guy. I think about him at least once every hour. I don't really talk to him that much unless it's like a few sentences about volleyball. And he has a girlfriend. But I really like him and I don't know what to do. Any ideas??

(if your gonna be a d**k don't even bother writing an answer. I'm really looking for advice.)

Answer 1

if he has a Gf then don;t bother, theres not enough there to suggest he likes you in that way, you may just get hurt

Answer 2

My friend used to tell me this all the time: when it comes to a guy having a long term relationship with a girl, he's probably not going to break up with her. If it was long term, then there were so many opportunities for him to break up with her but he didn't. That means the guy likes her for who she is, inside and out. If they've only been together for a little bit, then all it takes is a girl prettier than the previous girl, because he hasn't developed an emotional attraction yet, just a physical one so it will be easier. I know it sounds awful, but it's true. How long has he been with her for? If it was a long time, then leave him alone. Sorry hun, but if you try to mess things up, he'll hate you for it and even worse you'll never talk to him if his really close girlfriend doesn't want him to talk to you. If they haven't been together for long, flirt with him but not overly excessive. Either way, he shouldn't cheat on his girlfriend, because he might do the same to you.

Answer 3

Well I usually don't like to answer questions outside of P&S, but you are one of my contacts so I would be glad to help. =]

The best advice I can give you is just try to be friends with this guy. You mentioned that you don't really talk much to him unless it's about volleyball. Try talking to him about other things, what he likes to do for fun and what classes he is taking. You know basic stuff like that. You also mentioned that he has a girlfriend, so it would be bad for you to interfer in his relationship. One tip that I found out first hand is that you should never be with a person who will leave their current bf/gf for you because you never know if he will do the same to you. Right now take it slowly and just talk to him. Show him that your interested by doing those little things that girls like to do when they flirt. Laugh at his jokes, play with your hair, and pretty much just listen to him. I am a guy, and I love to be approached by a girl. It takes most of the stress off of me and I won't be there worried that I have to impress her. Once the guy knows your interested, then you can pursue it even further. Like I said before, just be careful you don't want a bf that will leave their current gf for you. I hope this helps.  

Answer 4

i'm in the same situation, but the other way around.  i'm a guy and she has a bf.  there are two main answers that i have gotten.  wait and see what happens or tell how you feel and hope for the best.  the up side to the first option is that you can gain some "friendship points" with him until he break up with his gf, if he ever does  the down side is that it is possible that they are meant for each other and will never break up.  the up side to the second option is that you control when things happen.  if you can not wait any longer then tell him, but of course the down side to that is that he has the right to reject you at that very moment and everything will be over, unless he has a change of heart later on.  in my particular situation i'm choosing to wait and see what happens, but i can't wait forever.... good luck

Answer 5

My advice, from experience. Is to just leave it alone. I know it's not what you want to hear, but chances are if he has a girlfriend, and you suggest something, it's always going to end up badly.

Just say you told him and he wasn't into leaving his girlfriend, you'd be shunned by both his and her friends. Or if he just wanted to use you as a booty call. Or even if he left his girl for you, what's to say he wouldn't do the same to you later?

I'm just suggesting you find someone single and who you know is into you.

If he breaks up with his girl, UN-influenced by you, make sure to have him call you. ;)

Good luck.