I love my boyfriend but i hate his lifestyle.. HELP =( ...?

Question

my boyfriend stays out till like 3 am getting high and drunk with his friends, hes a pot head to the extreme (not to mention he got me started on it) and i hate that he's been doing it multiple times a day. i told him i wish he would stop doing it so often but he doesnt listen. i dont really wana be with a person like that but i do love him and i would never consider leaving him. what do i do??

Answer 1

Your never going to get him to quit. He has to want to quit first. If you really don't like the life style and the fact he smokes everyday multiple times a day...your going to have to leave him. Seriously, or you'll end up smoking with him more and more...it's a pattern.

Answer 2

same thing happened to me.

i felt like a complete hypocrite to.

he ended up leaving me because i wouldn't have s*x with him.

we're still really good friends, but i won't do any of that again with him.

since i did that stuff [drink and smoke] with him, we've been ok.

now i will ONLY drink with him.

it all depends on how much you "love" him.

my ex and i ended up in a sister/brother relationship.

Answer 3

ask him to amend or you will renounce him for all times to come. If still he does not correct himself, you should withdraw from his company

Answer 4

Dump him quick.  Then we he begs you to give him another shot (during the break up) say alright, but you must stop doing these things.  If he still slips up, you may need to move on.  

Answer 5

Umm, consider leaving him!

I understand that you love him as a person.  But you don't love life with him.  It's very possible for you to find someone who you both love, and have a wonderful lifestyle with.

Answer 6

I agree you should totally dump him because he could totally ruin his or most likely your life just think if you got pregnant what kind of father would he be?

Answer 7

ok...i understand how that is. just simply tell him he really needs to change his ways or you may think about taking a break. a little bluff never hurts anyone. tell him you are feeling that he doesnt care eough about you to not listen to how you feel about what he is doing...how long have you guys been dating....if you have been dating under six months...it may not be worth it.  

Answer 8

If you know what's best for you, leave him.  It is annoying you now, and it's only going to get worse.  Whatever you do, DON'T MARRY HIM!  Think about if you want your children around this kind of person.  I speak from experience (I don't smoke, but I know people who do,) weed is addictive and it will take a lot for him to stop.  Good luck, and please follow my advice.

Answer 9

Well, I'm sorry to say this but you need to consider leaving him!  Tell him that you can't stand to be with him if he continues.  Give him a chance, help him by seeking some counseling!  And if he doesn't change after this, you deserve better.

Answer 10

he's killing himself with the pot, don't let him bring you down with him.  dump him. find a guy that you can trust.

Answer 11

What's he running from?

Pot isn't that bad, just expensive.

If yall are young...this is the beginning of a slippery slope.

If yall are 30ish...this is who he is.

As long as he isn't spending his last $10 on a dime bag, let him cut loose.

Answer 12

I think you should get his family and friends and all tell him how you feel and whats its doing all your lives. and tell him to go to rehab and if he dosent wanna go then youll either have to get usto it or brake up with him.

Answer 13

try and introduce him to other things he can do with his time. maybe you should spend more time with him going places and doing sober things. i think it'd probably help if you stopped smoking pot (if you are) because then he'd probably get the message that you're not into it. if he's into YOU he'll listen to you when you show him your concern. just dont try and go changing him to a different person because he probably wont like that.

talk rationally with him, and good luck!

Answer 14

Well since you would never consider leaving him, get ready for a life of pain. You will be living from paycheck to paycheck, he will never be home, his friends will be more important than you and he will do whatever he wants. You will be supporting him. Good Luck!

Answer 15

first of all how old are you and how old is he? because most tennage guys go through these phases. if you love eachother you will be able to compromise on these issues.

Its a maturity thing really. eventually the novelty of staying out all nite and drinking wears off, and eventually his pot use will too. ive been thru it with my boyfriend and were coming up to our 4 year anniversary.  its just a matter of how long ur willing to wait for him to grow up

Answer 16

You can't change a person. He is going to have to want to change for himself and get help on his own. Giving him options on your relationship status may motivate him but he's a guy, they do what they want in their time.  

Answer 17

then dont marry him

not sure wh you posted this in marriage but you clearly don't like what hes doing and its no way for a relationship why would you never conside3r leaving him? hes only a boyfriend. Talk to him and if he doesnt change, move on. theres plenty of guys out there that dont smoke pot

Answer 18

wow i went threw the same thing.

im srry to say this but the best thing to do its let him gooo

n trust me it gets worst n worst as time passes

but if he loves you; then he`ll stop n get back to you.

Answer 19

You would never consider leaving him?

Boy are you stupid.

He's not going to change.

Move on.  

Answer 20

this is not the lifestyle that ever makes for a happy relationship, because the pot is more important than u are and always will be.u need to get out of this relationship, what u allow u become.

Answer 21

Well if he is constantly getting drunk and high he will eventually kill himself. Will you wait that long until he is an emergency room?

You need to give him a dillema between you and the drugs.

If he chooses the drugs then he doesn't love you and he doesn't deserve you.

If he carries on then this will make you upset and will be the end of the relationship.