I m 19 && ive been through many obstacles in life...i feel like im ready to commit...am i TOO young!?!?

Question

i feel my time is ticking && im never going to see life after my 30's...im ready to get married && have my very own children....why do i feel like this...!?!

Answer 1

Hun, I'm young, and I've felt like this before, the real question is is there a specific someone you love and are sure you want to me with forever and start a family with, or are you just lonely? I know what both are like, but I'm 21 now, and glad I don't have a husband (or a specific man as my husband) or kids. I'm just not ready. I get lonely and all, but people need time to learn who they are, and plus don't you want to find the perfect guy? Give yourself some time to live and know you, find the most wonderful guy who you know will make you happy forever, and then settle down. And then wait a while before having kids and enjoy some time being married and loving each other without the burden of children.

Good luck!

Answer 2

if i where you i'd make sure to get my college degree first and hold down a job long enough to be insured through them, so you can actualy provide for another beeing

Answer 3

Well, if you're with someone you truly love, then I would say go for it. I just turned in late July and am 6 months pregnant, been with the same guy for 5 years. If you're ready, then I would do it, but just be positive it's the right time for you and your partner-not anyone else. Good luck!

Answer 4

I got married 2 months before I turned 19. I found out I was pregnant just after that. That didn't turn out so good, but we're going to try again come October or November.

As long as you've found someone you love, it's not too soon. Some people may disagree with me, but a lot of people thought I was crazy for getting married and pregnant so quickly and didn't think my husband and I could handle a miscarriage (it made us closer).

If you've found the right person, go for it. If not, wait a little while. He'll come eventually.

Answer 5

Too young. A marriage and kids is a TON of work. I know at everyone thinks they know what a TON of work is but you don't until you actually have a family to deal with.

Enjoy your youth - you will have plenty of time to grow up later.

Answer 6

i always wanted a baby from a very young age and i was 19 nearly 20 when i had my first girl (she is now 6) and i have just had another girl 4 months old and i feel that i am more patient now than i was at such a young age, also when your so young people judge you so i felt likee i was always being judge and wasnt doing a good enough job, i dont know why you feel that your not going to see life but if you think you are going to die and 10 or so yrs why would you put a kid through loosing there mum at such a young age my dad died when my brothers were that young and they are paying for his death now by the way theey act and stuff good luck with what ever you decied

Answer 7

If you think you won't see life after your 30s(I take that to mean you think you will die before or during your 30s), then why would you want to bring a child into the world only to turn and die leaving it motherless?

If that's not what you meant, then maybe you should re-word your question.

Answer 8

I think that at 19 you need to find your own voice, find out what you really like, find out what you don't like, explore new things and be totally and completely committed to yourself. I assure you that if you do not, you will regret it. When you get married and have children, most of your life is being a mommy and a wife, there's not a lot of time left for yourself. How do I know? I got married at 21 years old, I am absolutely IN LOVE with my husband and have a great life however, I have to admit that I really wish that I would have waited until I was 30 to get married. I wish that I would have traveled more, dated more, bought a home on my own first, had my own money coming into the marriage, etc. I know that in the end you'll do what you feel is right, but I hope that you take into consideration what I have said. Best of luck to you.

Answer 9

Its not about age. There are SO many factors involved!!

You've got to think about who, what, when, where, and why! (man, I wish I wasn't too tired to answer this thoroughly).

Who are you going to have a baby with? Do they want a kid? How long have you been together? Can you trust them completely? How much money are you making? Can you support yourself and two other people? How are you going to pay for child care? Medical? (Baby's have a TON of shots, and expensive check-ups in the first two years of their life; not to mention what it costs for pre-natal check-ups, even if you have insurance.)  Where will the baby sleep? Formula or breast? Are you happy? Think about what kind of life you want your kid to have.

Now, I'm going to tell you a little about myself:

Growing up, my parents were separated. I lived a somewhat "cinderella story". I was pushed and pulled around, here and there. I didn't have a chance to really settle down, get a place or job, or vehicle, let alone continue schooling. When I was 19, I got accepted to a trade school (a job corps center). When I was about 21, I'd finished trade school. My major was welding, and minor was Information Technology. I'd won third place in a welding competition, and so I got a scholarship to go to a secondary school. I was dating this guy. He took care of me, he was sweet, he loved me, bla bla bla. We were gonna get married someday, and all that.

About a month after I was preggers, I found out. The guy began to treat me like c**p. I moved from place to place, because my bf and I couldn't keep jobs. I wanted to give up my daughter, because I realized I couldn't provide the life I wanted to give her. I wasn't going to be able to pay for school supplies, I couldn't stay home with her cuz I'd be working, if she got sick I wouldn't have insurance to take care of her and I didn't want to live off the state. I wanted her to have a life with a family that would love and take care of her.

I still have her, and I had another child. We live on our own, I married that guy, and we're just now really on our feet and getting along - its been about 4yrs since it began.

We struggle, and its hard. And, NOTHING can prepare you for a real, live baby of your own. lol.

Btw, its natural and normal to want to be married and have kids. I think you should just take the steps to provide all of you, as a family, with the best life you KNOW YOU can provide. It costs a lot - financially, emotionally, and physically.

Best wishes.