I need HELP!! My Mother in Law is driving me Crazy!!!!

Question

Ok. So me and my husband have been living with my MIL for a little over 2 years now with our 4 year old son. and recently I had a baby girl who is now 4 months old. Ok so This woman is crazy... She tries to tell me how to raise my son.. If I try to punish him for not lisitining she flips out. and what makes it worse is that on a few occations she said that she should be his mother!!! Now I was always taught by my mother to respect your elders. Which I do I have never said anything disrespectful to her. (good thing she can't read my mind) But I am really getting to the point where I am about to leave my husband because of her. She Drinks every night. Smokes pot. Doesn't listin to me or my husband when we say our son can't have something or do something. She thinks she is gods gift and is perfect. She smoked Pot all her life and even smoked pot and done worse drugs with her son when he was just 15!!! She thinks she knows everything and I know nothing. I want to get out of here but right now have no money and no place to go. I don't know what to do. I am really gonna end up going crazy. I was already in a hospital once before because of her and her s**t. She plays mind games with you. She is 2-faced she'll be your best friend in front of you then be talking s**t and soon as you walk away. She tried to get my son to call her mom. When he was about 2 and was just learning to say grandma he couldn't say it and so he called her "ma" and she Loved it!!!! I think because she screwed up her sons lives and was a bad mother she is trying to take my son and make him hers. She doesn't even ask me if she can take him somewhere anymore she just says " ohI'm taking him to here or there" I can't stand it. And my husband who I love so so much thinks I just have to deal with it. I can't do it anymore I told him I would rather live in a 2 bedroom basement apartment then live here. There is so much more to this but It would take me a year to write all she has done to me and MY family. Well I would really like it if someone had advice for me anything would help..

Thank You.

Answer 1

I think you should either kick her out or move somewhere and leave her at your current location

Answer 2

You and your husband need to get away so were you can talk. You need too get him to listen about his Mom. You two need to sit some ground-rules for her too follow while she is in your home,that you both can agree upon. Wait to your son is asleep and then both of you speak too her,about her bad behavior. Especially telling you how to punish your child and smoking-pot in your home.Both of you need too confront her about her two-face attitude,tell her her mind games will stop and right now,and if she doesn't like it too get the h**l out. It is your home run it as you see fit,not the other way around.

Answer 3

Why are you living with her?  I would live in someones garage before I put up with that woman.  She is being disrespectful to you and your children.  They should not be in a house where their grandma is smoking pot and drinking.  I'd get out of there a.s.a.p.

Answer 4

This is so sad for the children. This problem is between you and your husband. Your children deserve to live away from this woman. I dont know how you can solve this.

Answer 5

first off, if you are living under her roof FOR TWO YEARS.....you have issues as well -

your husband definitely has issues for wanting to live with his mother still - sounds as if he has a lack of responsibility issue

probably the best thing for you to do - is to take your kids, find a stable environment and raise them yourself -

however, i am not sure how successful this would be as it seems there is a lot of co-dependency issues going on in the entire household -

get counseling - services are free/low cost/sliding scale (you actually have to look for them)

good luck

Answer 6

Ok first you left alot of important info out and please don't get mad at me for this but........1st you cant act like your putting up with this evil pothead when you and your husband are no way near perfect......you know what i mean......the problem with that alone is just as much yours and his as it is hers and you know it...2nd you know my feelings on you living there but you know what with no money and your husband refusing to move out of a state that you will NEVER be able to survive in, you have no other choice but to live there unless you put your feeling for your children above and beyond your feelings for your husband....which you probably won't ever do. no one is going to have a miracle solution to this problem...your either stuck there forever with your husband or you can get out with your kids!!!  if he loves you and those kids he will follow and if he doesn't follow then hey is he really worth it?????

it's is a totally screwed up situation but you have the choice here no one is forcing you to stay there.....

Answer 7

GO! get out of there while you can. If your husband won't come with you, go alone. You need to get away from her lifestyle. What kind of message are you sending your kids that grandma does drugs. I would'nt want my kids exposed to that kind of enviorment. You and your husband need a place of your own. I suggest get one now, even if it's a small apt, but get out of there.

Answer 8

I think you r really in trouble!

But i know that old people like her think like children. When they don't have your attention they just do anything to tease you or to drive you crazy. I bet she gets so happy when she sees you mad or furious.

So I think you should play her game but the other way. Try to show her some love, and smile in her face ( even if you were lying).

find something to make her busy, let her help you cleaning the house or cooking. pretend that she knows better than you.

and for your kids, let your 4 year-old kid tell her that the smoke bothers him and he would love her better if she quit it.

just treat her like a kid, it is all psychology. If you read more about it you could manipulate her.

Good luck, I bet she is trying to make up for being a good mother but her dignity prevents her.