I need a change -- but i'm too depressed to change?!?

Question

I am 32 and work as admin assistant (which i hate). i studied art in school but i was too afraid to make a go at it. i am now very depressed and see a therapist once a week. she tells me that i am depressed because my life is not moving forward. she think i should finish my degree and change my career to something that interests me. i agree with all of this -- the trouble is, since i am really depressed, NOTHING interests me -- including school or choosing a career. I feel like i'm in a terrible cycle that i can't get out of. I can't be happy unless i change things, but i can't change things until i am happy?! What can I do? I really need some advice and guidance... thanks. ;-)

Answer 1

Hi, I think your real problem is you are bored of your life and since you're getting old you wanted something good to happen in your life however you don't know how or where to start. you don't know how to move forward.

First I think you should set a goal. Dream for a something that is feasible and attainable. I don't think you'll dream for something that doesn't interest you. Maybe you could dream of having a restaurant or bar of your own. Or maybe dream of having an art inclined business like customized pillows, cards and bags. Whatever your dream may be start from there. If you want a bar or restaurant start scouting for good restaurants and wines etc. You may also get a course in culinary arts.    While you still have your work start little by little in fulfilling your dream. you don't really have to resign and focus on it right away. Start by gathering informations then when everything gets well you may start giving it your full attention.

You should also set a deadline for your dream, For example in two I'll be an entrepreneur and so on. Remember dream for something that is attainable. And remember don't take this as change its actually goal setting and achieving it. You're just giving color into your gray scale life. :)  

Answer 2

Meds are NOT the answer. I know for a fact. Doctors shove that stuff on you because they're in the pocket of Big Pharma. Sure...take a pill...walk around in a daze, thinking happy thoughts...happy thoughts...

You will not change. UNLESS you get the gumption to make it happen. No pill will do that for you. It can only come from one place. Been there done that started over from scratch. Time to leave the pity party and point your life in the direction you want. Scary? You bet your @ss it is. But exciting, too.

Now...quit whining and start living.

Answer 3

Try going out and seeing the things you used to like. If you liked to paint go to a gallery or a museum.  Or maybe just go hang out on a Art school campus.  Step out of the life thats depressing you and try to look at it from a differant angle. Make changes one at a time.  It may feel daunting at first but youll be surprised how fast it disappears and you get your passion for things back.

Answer 4

I'd try an antidepressant med of a 6 mo to a year and see if it helps. Sometimes you just need this initial kick to start moving forward.

Answer 5

you need to stop thinking about your life and just forget every piece of S**t thats gone on in it and move on, get over it. Get a job in a really busy place and wear a smile so people smile back and start talking to you so you make friends, join clubs go in with an open mind and dont say nothing interests you, i doubt you;v tried everything....

Answer 6

What is the point of paying a therapist and not taking her advice. Just ask her the question that you are asking here and keep at her until she gives you a concrete answer. A lot of these people prefer it if you come to the answer in your own time but that could take months. The rest of her advice is good. Good luck.

Answer 7

Its frustrating when you feel this way i know. But you are the ONLY one who has the power to change something in your life. Just remember you only have ONE life and you don't want to waste it!

Why not go out with some friends from uni - go out and have some fun! And try looking towards the future and make changes for the better.

If you love Art then make a go of it! Don't worry about what other people think, do it because you love it. I hope everything works out and remember to always believe in your self.

Answer 8

well, your therapist is right. you should move towards changing your career to something you enjoy and are good at doing, that will make you much happier.

but- i do understand what you mean when you say " i can't be happy unless i change things, but i can't change things until i am happy." a lot of people feel the same way but don't realize it. it's very good that you realize that, that's the first step.

i deal with a lot of anxiety and depression myself, and i have a lot of  ways with dealing with it. here's an article (it's not too long, don't worry) explaining how to basically make yourself happier.

i hope this helps

good luck and i hope you get the motivation you need. =)

http://www.webmd.com/depression/features...