I need a good reason to give my sister in law

Question

why I cannot attend her son's wedding, (overseas) in a few months. I live in Australia and the wedding is in India. If I give her my real reasons, which are, I've already visited that country 3 times in the past year; the cost of airfare is very dear; I hate leaving my cat home with my daughter- AGAIN, because she does not care for my cat the way I do, my sis-in-law will not accept them.

So if anyone have any good suggestions, please let me have them.

Thank you.

Answer 1

Cannot take the time off from work or you'll lose your job.  

Cannot afford airfare.  I suggest you really find out how much it is.

For me to fly home-- 600 miles ( in the US). It doubled from when I went home Oct 2007 and when I went in June 2008.

Airfare + all the other things is LOTS of money now !    

Cannot leave your house. There have been robberies in the area, and you need to stay there.  

Unexpected large expense.  I cant think of one, but you know what your own life could bring about.      Say, you must get a new car or something major like that.  

Answer 2

Who cares if she believes you or not - tell her the truth.  Its her problem if she doesn't accept them.   Or just say 'no'.  Why do we all think we have to justify to others why we say 'no'?  No means no.  You shouldn't have to justify your reasons if she cannot accept the truth.  Its selfish to expect someone to travel that far without being mindful of the cost especially since you have been there already in the last 3 months.  

Have a chat to your nephew and explain your reasons to him.  I'm sure he'd understand.  

Answer 3

youve visited 3x the past year?

wow that is insane. You need to just tell her that you cant afford to visit her this time around, and that you will make it up to her with a visit later. Seriously - she is asking a huge call - i think it is about time you make her realise it!

Its not her choice to accept them or not - jeez... some people (like yourself) just dont know when to stop giving.  

Answer 4

Asked if she is going to take care of the bill while you go to India, if she says she is then give her a list of the most expencive places you would like to visit while you are in India that will give her something to think about.

Answer 5

sitter

Answer 6

In a few months it would be peak season in airfares, since most people will be going overseas during the summer holidays in Australia. Say that you tried booking a flight to India, but all airlines are fully booked, and that you have been wait-listed. Then tell her, close to the wedding, that you couldn't get a seat. I'm sure this will work.

Also all the answers given above are great too.

Answer 7

Clearly you have decided not to go. And the answers already given are good. I can understand your unwillingness to leave the cat in your daughter's care. I have the same problem, and being a cat lover,  I am not entirely comfortable with the idea of boarding her/him in a cat motel, however good that may be.

Being an Indian myself I realise family commitments come way before personal reasons, and like someone said, why do we have to justify ourselves,,,,, but that happens in a perfect world, and ours definitely is not.

Bite the bullet, and go,  for a couple of weeks the most. Your family will appreciate that.

Answer 8

It is obvious you do not want to go, just say that you can not afford to go back there again at this stage, but could she send a video of the wedding to you please.She will have to accept it. If you lye about it you would  be caught out. Good luck.

Answer 9

All the previous answers are good, but I actually think the truth would be quite acceptable, you have some really good reasons to tell your sister in law to be honest with you.

Answer 10

i wauld blame work clashing with the date of the wedding it always works and is always acceptable,just tell her ur goin n then cancel with the work excuse at the last minute..hope dis helped

Answer 11

Tell her you can't afford it. That always works for me when I don't want to go on some family reunion trip.

Or if that doesn't work. Tell her you had a horrible time in India last time you visited and you just can't face it again for a long time.

Answer 12

just say you are out of money.

Answer 13

well just say you can't afford to go - surely she'd understand that, she can't force you to go if you don't want to go. if she doesn't accept it tell her that if she's willing to pay for your expenses then you'll go, i bet you she'll stop nagging you abou it.

good luck

Answer 14

Ok you have been in the past year 3 times to India?  Money isn't a probelm then...Your cat as an excuse isn't one either talk to a vet about local Pet Motels you can leave your cat at most of the time they are looked after better then when they are at home!

Is there a personal reason why you don't want to go?  I think attending your nephews wedding would be a fantastic experience one that you don't want to miss and you won't be able to get on another trip to India.

Answer 15

1. sick

2. just broke up with someone?

3. your friend needs you desperately

4. work deadline

goodluck xo

Answer 16

Your reasons seem pretty valid. Just state firmly that you regret you cannot attend the wedding. If she doesn't accept your reasons, you can leave it at that. There is no law that says someone has to "win" in a disagreement.