I need advice for my life on how to stop my laziness, be more active and have the life i want.?

Question

Hey, I'm in high school and i need advice on my pathetic life. i am very lazy and fat. i really need to become mentally stronger to be able to take control of myself. i need to exercise but instead i just begin procrastinating and wasting time. i love to eat but i need to control my cravings and try to eat healthier. i basically have no self esteem and i have a great deal of trouble trying to talk to and hook up with a girl. i believe that if i do what i want to do to lose weight, i would be able to. i loove playing baseball and im told by everyone of my coaches that i have great potential to become great. with the help of my coaches, i would be able to become that fit person that i want to be, but my mom is totally against. she thinks that i will do good in swimming and that baseball has a lot of competition so there is no point of start getting seriously into that. the lack of support from my mother has greatly affected me. since i did bad in school last year, my mom wont let me do baseball. i have been doing terrible i my school work the past few years...basically since i got into high school. this is simply because of my laziness. instead of doing homework or studying for a test, i become to lazy and try to avoid and start procrastinating. this is ruining me. i start to think about how i wish my life was better or something and wishing i had my many wishes and start day dreaming about having a girlfriend or being the coolest guy around. i need to stop that because it is taking my mind off my studies. when my mom isnt around, instead of studying, i'm on the computer stocking people on facebook or playing video games. i really need to be able to concentrate on my work. also, my mom has too many expectations of me. she is pressurizing me by yelling at me for 3 strait days after i get a grade below 93. she expects me to get strait A+'s on my report card. she is the main reason why i dont have a social life. she is limiting the way i want to live my life. if i dont become an athlete in my life, i want to become a business man or like a something related to finance, im good at math, im 3 yrs. ahead of my class. but, my mom doesnt want me to become that, she wants me to have a profession in the sciences like engineering, but im not interested in science at all. i only want to get that over with in my academic career. how would i try to convince my mother to do the things that i want in life, not her? how do i fix my laziness in my life? should i meditate or something? also, my mother wants me to be an engineer instead of an athlete or business because a stupid indian fortune teller ppl who only take money for saying lies. like, one guy said that my fathers debt would end by 3 months ago, but it has became only worse. she believes in people who dont even know what will happen to them selves in the next 2 minutes. i need advice on what to do in my life. i love baseball, and my mom doesn't. Please help and answer seriously!!!

Thanks.

Answer 1

OK I understand what you're going through because I have a procrastination problem myself. What I do to keep focused is thinking of consequences that will occur if I don't stay focused. As for your grades, you're doing excellently. A grade of 93 is awesome!!!!! Really, anything above 80 is really good. At my high school, having an average of 80 or over would entitle one to Honors. With the marks you have you could get lots of scholarships.

Now, how to deal with your mom's high expectations. I think the best way to solve any problem is communication. Ask your mom if you can sit down and talk with her sometime. Make sure you allot about an hour to an hour and a half for this... you don't want to speed through it. Explain to her your viewpoint, and voice your opinion on what you want to be when you become an adult. In my opinion, only you should decide your future. If you let anyone else do it for you, you could end up not enjoying your career.

When you're speaking, make sure to be calm and controlled. Do everything you can to avoid an argument. For example, it seems like you don't like it when your mom yells at you. Try using the phrase, "When you ________, I feel ________." Fill in the blanks with "yell at me" and "sad".

You could also explain to her why you love baseball so much. Tell her that playing baseball makes you happy, and also mention that your coach has said that you have the potential to become great. One note though: don't settle on becoming a baseball superstar. I imagine it is very difficult to make it to the top. Being a business person or working in finance would also be a great job to have. And with your knowledge in math, I bet you could work in this area.

If you're mom doesn't allow you to play baseball right away, try to compromise with her. Show her how much you want to play baseball by working hard in school. For example, study hard for tests. When you do well, show her that you care about it by telling her what your grade was and how good it felt to be successful on the test. Even show a little excitement. This is to show how the work (studying) paid off.

Once you settle things with your mom (however don't get discouraged if she doesn't change right away... improving a relationship can take time) and you are doing better in school, you will likely find that you are a happier person. Use this new-found happiness to tackle another goal: becoming more fit. Tell yourself everyday that by exercising, you will become better at sports, and feel better about your appearance.

On the girls topic: not all girls are uptight and just want a hot guy. There are lots of girls that are not so shallow. Most importantly, be yourself, be polite, be considerate, be compassionate. Don't try to be something you're not. And don't get discouraged if your first guy-girl relationship doesn't work out. There are a lot of girls out there. It just might take some time to find the right one.

Don't forget, your goals may not come easily, you will have to work to achieve them. The first step is believing in yourself, and believing you can achieve your goals. Don't get discouraged if things don't work out exactly how you plan them to. There are also resources other than Yahoo Answers... your school probably has a counselor you can talk to. He or she will probably give better advice than me or any other person here.

I really hope this helps. Good luck.

Answer 2

You have to mentally put yourself in a place where you are ready for change- when you are ready for change and put the routine into motion it will become easier and the cravings and laziness will lessen.

You have to make a decision and you can't break it. You have to decide and stick with it. You have to want to change more than you want to be comfortable.

Forget your mom and do what you want to do and stick to it.