I need help can I ha e a few answers to my question please?

Question

How do I learn how to stand up for myself?As I don't speak up for myself enough!I am a nice person and prefer to get on with everyone but there have been times in my life when rude people have taken advantage of my niceness, what do I do as I have to sort this out as I am going to be 25 in two weeks time!!!

Answer 1

i found that taking karate gave me a new found confidence. i used to get picked on at school when i was younger, but as i went more i gained more confidence. i'm not saying you should fight people now lol. but it just gives you that extra confidence boost to say no to people every now and then. i know how you feel i'm exactly the same way, people ask me to do things for them and i find it so hard to say no.

i'm probably going to end up donating a limb or something one day lol.

Answer 2

Best thing really (and this may sound extreme, but it's not as bad as some people think) is to take up mixed martial arts. Aka cage fighting. It's not as brutal as some people believe and they teach respect and also self assertion without the arrogance. So you know, i was in your shoes once.

Answer 3

You don't have to cause trouble to defend yourself.  You know when someone is using you as a door-mat.  You also know where your breaking point is.  If a person is walking on you, put a stop to it.  You don't have to be hateful in doing so. You can politely say something like :Excuse me, I gave you a twenty and this is incorrect change (as an example). Don't be taken advantage of because you are a nice person.

Answer 4

I used to be a pushover too, but then someone took it too far and i promised myself i would never get used again. I do still try to be nice to everyone, but you've just got to remember that you can't please everyone and not everyone will like you.

you have to remember that you are worth just as much as everyone else, so do not let them order you around. That's what i tell myself if i feel I'm being taken advantage of. People will respect you more in the long run if you stand your ground and they will not try it on with you again!

good luck

x*x

Answer 5

The only way to stand up for yourself is when you say something is to mean it and be firm, you don't have to get in trouble with anyone, just be firm, you don't have to accept what everybody says, if you say no is no if you say yes is yes, also I have to say that carry on being yourself, do not change for anything or anybody else, hope this answer helps you to understand me and understand yourself. Good luck.

Answer 6

Hi,

I sometimes find myself saying yes to things, and then regretting it later!

I find a really good tip is to stop and think before immediately answering. Not for ages so you look silly, but maybe take a breath while considering. So if someone asks you an unreasonable question, before you say ' yeah, sure' have a quick pause and think and then say ' actually no, I can't.'

You might want to focus on the people around you who aren't like that, and give them your quality time instead of the people who take advantage.

But don't stop being nice, that's a really good quality and people should respect you for it.